Welcome back to Last Week in TV, where the theme this week and next is marathoning. I still have the Halt and Catch Fire, Penny Dreadful, Defiance and Major Crimes to do. Week after that is Buffy season 2. So what are you marathoning this summer? Anything you think I should check out too? If so, nominate it. Speaking of, the nominated show of the week was Beauty and the Beast this week. Please remember that my opinions won't necessarily be yours since I have very strong opinions about romance on TV. If romance is your thing, you should check it out. Other than that, the Character Cup nominations have started and continue until Thursday at noon CST. I really hope you participate. It's going to be fun. Also if you watch Teen Wolf (and you should at least try it), we have a new Bingo game we're playing. Check it out and if you are live tweeting, tweet me when you have a Bingo. As always, drop a comment below to let me know how your TV week went. Until next week, happy viewing!
Overall Awards:
Yeah, I've said it before but it is a major pet peeve of mine when there's a shootout and the results are always lopsided. This is especially true this week when the bad guys often had far superior weaponry. It is especially apparent when you are marathoning action shows. Take 24. For terrorists with automatics, they were terribly trained. I expected more from your henchmen, Mama Psycho. Then you had the Al-Qaida with rocket launchers who managed to wound one person and that was with flying shrapnel. Rocket launchers. LA gang members didn't do much better on Gang Related. Perhaps it's a performance anxiety issue because they seem to do just fine whenever the police are not around. Heck, random dude with a gun on The Leftovers did better than most of the trained hitmen I watched this week. In fact the only "bad" guys who seemed to be kicking butt were berserkers on Teen Wolf and angels on Dominion. I'm not saying thebad guys should win. I would hate that. Just if you are going to have a shootout, they should hit what they are aiming for at least 50% of the time and they certainly shouldn't be so much better armed that it borders ludicrous when they lose. And before someone points out that these 2 in the picture got taken out by the superior missile power of a Navy ship, I still don't know how they couldn't take out anyone before the Navy targeted them.
Linden Ashby / Sheriff asks Stiles and Scott if they are now involved with time travel
In all honesty, this may end up being the best scene of the summer season. It was that good. Sheriff walks in on a conversation with his two deputies, who are stumped because the teenager in front of them has the same fingerprints as ex-wanted fugitive, Derek Hale, an adult. That sparks the best reaction shots of the week as Sheriff peers at Teen Derek and then the mug shot and back again. He leans close to the teen and then goes back to the screen. Throughout the whole exchange you can see his face growing steadily more disconcerted until his son Stiles and his friend Scott break into the station at a run. At that point, he just hangs his head. It's definitely supernatural. He pulls them into his office and proceeds to lose it, protesting that if time travel is real he's done. It is gut-bustingly funny...in ALL the rewatches. Add to it the reactions of the teens and you've got a classic scene. Then when the teens try to explain you can almost see Sheriff wishing that it was indeed time travel because Beacon Hills is about to go Crazy Town again. This scene was a pure joy to watch mostly because Linden Ashby nails every reaction. Here, check it out for yourself.
This episode of Taxi Brooklyn was a far cry better than the pilot. It started off rough with Cait being a douche as normal. They really do need to tone her character down a bit. However, the second episode was a whole lot more fun and didn't take itself so seriously. If we are going to believe that a NYC police detective is incapable of driving herself and has to partner with a cab driver, then it's safe to say that it should go to comedy on a frequent basis. High as a kite Cait was bizarre to say the least but from that moment on the show descended into fun and high speed driving. In other words, a summer show. I like that they went to case of the week here and I think a balance between this and the serialized story would serve the show well. I presume the rich family will be the ones who keep Leo in the country and also pay his salary for being Cait's personal chauffer. If not, there's going to be one huge plot hole to walk through. Now if we could just have a little more Frankie time. Please.
Nominated Show:
Not every show is for every person and this episode touched upon two of my least favorite TV tropes - a romantic relationship as the central focus and amnesia. Ugh, I hate amnesia plots. (Looking at you Grimm.) As much as this show does have procedural elements and action, it is at its core a love story and that automatically puts me NOT in the target demo. While I liked the case of the week, it kept getting interrupted by Cat and Vincent relationship drama, which I found cloying, melodramatic, and worse momentum-killing. As an anti-shipper, I wished the times they were on screen would move along faster and I enjoyed each of them better apart. I would much rather follow the story from Tess' point of view because I thought she was great. She's a tell it like it is friend and I appreciate those characters. In fact, I am equally intrigued by her story and Gabe's as I am with Vincent's. I did find shooting at the National September 11 Memorial to be touching and the song that was playing there was fantastic as a song-to-scene. The lyrics felt like a summary of the episode. Still the best thing for me were the flashbacks that delved more into Vincent's past and helped me understand him better as a character. I won't be watching this one again, but I wish it all the best in the world and I can see how the center romance has legions of fans. It's a shipper's tortured romance dream.
Grade: C-
Ranking: 1
Best Scene - Vincent saves his nephew
Best Action - Vincent vs. the fire bug
Best Quote - Cat: "Okay my life is a mess. Are you happy?" Tess: "Only if you switch out of those earrings. They're too dangly. I can't. I just can't."
Best Reason to Watch - the beast of the week was interesting and I imagine there was a lot of back story to the Vincent character revealed here
Best Reason to Fast Forward - the woe of lost romance shenanigans, especially the hospital scene at the beginning
Best Character - Tess
Best Super Power - walking through fire
Most Interesting Back Story - Vincent's brothers died in the World Trade Center attack
The "Are You an Idiot?" Award - Aaron Keller, who is not just impulsive but suicidally reckless. Way to put everyone in danger. This isn't stubborn, buddy. This is moronic.
Welcome Back Award - Hi, Jai from Covert Affairs. Glad to see you landed yourself in another job just as shady as the last one. Better luck with this one.
Worst Idea - Not sure walking into a man's home unannounced is a great idea, Former Jai, especially when he's an amnesiac who was created to be a killing machine. You may not be long for this world if you do.
Biggest Hmm - Does everyone know about these beasts? Say what? Former Jai used to be a beast? How many of them are there?
Worst Career Move - If you're a cop, you probably don't want to punch out a judge in a bar fight. Just saying. It doesn't look good on the resume.
The "Are You Kidding Me?" Award - No way Vincent's vitals go that wonky without sparking a ton of hospital workers into his room immediately. What city are they in because they need to seriously consider an alternative way of dealing with budget cuts?
The "Say What?" Award - The Muirfeld company took an arsonist and diagnosed pyromaniac and gave him the ability to walk through and throw fire. Hmm. Who thought this was a good idea? Why not give a serial killer machine gun arms?
Worst Plot Device - amnesia, always
Best Music - Stealing Cars by James Bay. This is a pitch perfect song-to-scene. The song lyrics talk about second chances, lifelines, reigniting memory, walking down the street alone together, sirens and smoke. That's basically a summary of this episode.
New Shows:
It's 3 years after 2% of the population vanished without a trace and everyone is traumatized. That's pretty much all I understood so you're on your own from here. There are chain-smoking mutes in white playing live action trolls. The sheriff sees deer everywhere which may or may not be real. A crazy cult guy is hinting at Apocalypse after dreaming of his vanished son. Teens are idiots and a rampant STD epidemic is likely to break out at any minute. Oh and NOTHING happened for 72 minutes. Seriously, nothing. There was a parade and people got ticked at the creepy white cult. Some congressman went for crazy magic healing. A lot of people cursed. For 72 minutes! That's some slow pacing.
Grade: C
Best Scene - brother and sister breaking down at the same time in 2 different places
Best Quote - Mayor: "They're heroes because no one's going to come to a parade on We Don't Know What the **** Happened Day."
Best Reason to Watch - it's all a mystery so if you like puzzles, this one is packed full of them for you
Best Reason to Fast Forward - everything that happens at teen parties
Most Disgusting - feral dogs taking down the deer
The Welcome Back Award - Hello Alpha Twins. You haven't been gone long but it's good to see you again.
The "Well Spin the Bottle has Changed" Award - And not for the better. What the heck people?
Most Interesting Way to Bond - burying a dog
Most Interesting Visual - the white balloons shaped as doves being lifted away / college kid screaming underwater
The "You Know You're in Trouble When…" Award - the sheriff is so drunk he's dropping his gun in the middle of the street, attacking people, and shouting out the neighborhood
Reckless wants to thrive on sexual tension between the leads and sexual scandals everywhere else. It would do better for me if it would thrive on solid police work, but everyone's far too corrupt for that. Let's just say that the Charleston PD is about as competent as The Following's Feds, but at least the Feds aren't generally sociopathic rapists and thieves. It's definitely root against the "good" guys TV. The only real mystery is going to be how nice guy gentleman Roy is going to manage to stay somewhat clean after being promoted to deal with such filth. That is of course if he really is what he claims to be. Basically it feels like a chance to show Girls Gone Wild within a more respectable genre. Pass.
Grade: D
Best Scene - Jamie proves her client is innocent
Best Quote - Judge: "Now I don't know how they run their courtrooms up in Chicago or New York, but down here we don't allow our attorneys to play Perry Mason." Jamie: "Who's Perry Mason?"
Best Reason to Watch - This show is bound to get steamier than Charleston in August so if you're into love triangles and sexual scandal this is for you.
Biggest Douche - Terry
Best Detective - Jamie, who is better than all these cops put together
The "Man, I Hope You are Not Evil" Award - Er scratch that. You're as evil as the rest of them, Cruz.
The "Only in the South" Award - are law offices housed in gorgeous mansions
The "Good Old Boy Network Sucks Anywhere" Award - The head of the police department fires the inappropriate female officer but retains the pervert, probably rapist male officer. Ain't only in the South and it sucks out loud everywhere. Fire both and improve your department twofold.
Welcome Back Award - to Adam Rodriguez, who played Jesse on Roswell and Eric on CSI: Miami
Best Sign - Roy's house is full of pictures from and of his kids
Marathoned Shows:
Can't believe I'm saying this but 24:LAD, you should have killed the president. It would have made for a dramatic next episode. Now you're just another in a long line of TV teases. Plus now I'm stuck with subplot 3, which just isn't as thrilling. We went from saving hundreds of thousands of lives within 3 hours to saving software. Yes, I realize that the software could potentially hurt even more people, but let's face it. It's not near as visceral and a good action adventure needs that extra oomph. You've failed me here 24, and you only have 3 more episodes to get the intensity upright again.
Grade: Before Heller did not die, I would have said A. Now more like a B overall and rapidly falling. Subplot 3 isn't near as appealing to me.
Best Scene - President Heller elicits Jack and Mark's help in surrendering to Margot
Best Quote - President: "I am the President of the United States of America and I just gave you an order." Belchek: "I am not an American citizen; this is not America." / Jack: "The only death tonight on my head is yours."
Best Reason to Watch - a freaking missile took out a mansion / great plotting
Best Reason to Fast Forward - whatever this mess between Jack and Audrey was / torturing Kate
The "You Suck Out Loud" Award - the writers and show runners of 24 who could have blazed a trail of TV guts but instead pulled a fast one. Argh! And here I was lauding you for actually going through with killing Heller. A pox on you all.
Best Character - Jordan, although President Heller grew on me too
Best Move - Kate tries to knock her torturer out by choke holding him with her legs - total kick butt move
Least Surprising - Navarro and Adrian are both dirty.
The "Are You Kidding Me?" Award - Margo tells her daughter Simone that it isn't Simone's fault that Margo had a henchman cut Simone's finger off. No kidding, you psycho witch. It's your fault. Time to off Mama.
The "Bureaucracy Sucks" Award - So Kate is the only one to believe Bauer and finds proof of a drone attack and they are going to bench her to do paperwork because of policy violations? Even on TV bureaucracy sucks.
Best Reason to Watch the Entire Series - I have no idea why the Russians are so peeved at Jack that the President wouldn't let him try to stop a missile attack on an ally.
Biggest Hero Award - Naveed for at least trying to stop his crazy mom-in-law
Best Turnabout - Simone tries to save her husband's family from her mother
It is very hard for me to like a show when I can't root for the main character. I know that I am supposed to find TC charming and wounded. I find him a walking disaster with narcissistic tendencies. More importantly though, the show takes great pains to portray him as the only doctor who can do no wrong medically. He makes seriously shady decisions and he never gets called on them, except by the bureaucrats whom we're supposed to hate. This is the kind of attitude towards a character that is guaranteed to make me dislike them more. It's a shame because there are a whole lot of characters I do like in this. Topher is amazing and he's the funniest, always important. Alas, I'm not sure how much more I can take of TC. There is no way he would still be practicing medicine without having to go through intensive therapy. Nor should he. It's time for someone to take him down for being the mess that he is. The walking wounded are only appealing when they are taking steps to get better.
Grade: C
Best Character - Topher
Best Quote - Jordan: "You're making patients now?" Drew: "Well he was trying to do the same thing to me." / Drew: "Hey the nerds of today are the husbands of tomorrow."
Best Reason to Watch - these guys have the best pranks of all time
Biggest Awww Scene - Topher calls his daughter
The "Most in Need of Administrative Leave/Prozac/Intensive Therapy" Award - TC, who no way should operating on anyone
Biggest Surprise - TC's friend received his brother's heart in transplant / Landry's dad shows up with a knife sticking out of his chest / Raposa plays doctor
Best TV to Watch While Dieting - anytime they are with patients basically. Either the graphics or the conversation is likely to put you off food for awhile.
Most Disturbing - the elderly sex club complete with STDs
The "Say What?" Award - I thought transplants were based on things like blood type and you couldn't just randomly dump one person's heart into another's.
The "Oh the Joys of Texas" Award - drunk night feral pig hunting
The "High as a Kite" Award - Ragosa is a delight under the influence of ecstasy and by that I mean funny as all get out
While the first episode was a run of the mill and somewhat boring case, the last 5 minutes and all of the second episode were not. Death of a younger person is always hard to take. Suicide is worse. It's hard for me to separate the character death on the show from the real death of an actor I had seen working since he was a kid. I can't imagine how hard this must have been for the cast. Frankly I was glad to have a case that was intriguing in its own right to distract me from all the heartbreak of the episode. This one was hard to take. My heart goes out to the cast and crew of Rizzoli and Isles and to the family of Lee Thompson Young. While I tend to snark in these reviews, this is not the place. If you are struggling, people can help. Call 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or go to http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org You aren't alone.
Grade: C+ / A-
Best Scene - Jane breaks Ray by appealing to him as a father / the eulogy
Most Heartbreaking Scene - Frost's mom comes to the station and Jane volunteers to help with the service / the funeral
Biggest Awww Moment - Anytime anyone cried or teared up
Worst Moment - Frost dies in a car crash, which brings up all the sadness of Lee Thompson Young's death again
Best Quote - Jane: "So in this moment when there feels like there is none, here is the good news. Death may have taken Barry but it can't take our memories of him. Those wonderful and perfect and beautiful memories. Those thank God are ours to keep."
Least Surprising - The girlfriend did it. As I pegged the second from the first time she was questioned with Ray in their apartment
Weirdest Moment - Maura flosses the suspect's teeth. I know that means something but what are the chances that she bit the person she thinks she murdered?
Worst Sign - Jane is seeing ghosts, which is seemingly fine on Cold Case but not so good on Rizzoli & Isles
Best Character Interaction - Jane and Frankie
Best Music - the instrumental version of What a Wonderful World
Gang Related is its own addiction. You know it's bad for you, you try to get away, but somehow you end up in the old neighborhood again and suddenly you're back on it. There are so many moments in this show where I think it's not for me and I should walk away. Then they go and do something so right or so wrong that I cannot look away. I despise all the characters and yet I am strangely fascinated by their predicaments and wonky loyalties. I want everyone of them to be arrested, especially some of the cops, but I can't look away from the train wreck of their decision making. I find them absolutely unredeemable until they do something that shocks me or we get a piece of their back story. I don't want to like this show. I don't like this show. And yet it compels me to see it through until the end. So yeah, I'll be here next Thursday getting another hit.
Grade: B
Best Scene - Ryan stands up to Javier over the Russian pimp
Best Quote - Vee: "If I find out you killed me, I'll be back to return the favor." / Ryan: "What the hell is this?" Cass: "Home Makeover: Russian Mafia edition." / Vee: "You all might not hit a girl but I will knock a b** out."
Best Reason to Watch - This is not your typical cop show when the main character is stepping over the line in pursuit of warped justice. This guy is firmly on the gang's side and that makes it unique. Watching Ryan try to juggle 2 loyalties makes everything grey area.
Biggest Shock - I actually felt sympathy for Carlos and found his dad's speech about taking care of him moving. I'm generally a "you deserve what you get" TV viewer so for me to feel for this psycho means someone did one heck of a job writing this. Granted 10 minutes later I wanted them all dead again. But it was touching.
The "Patience is NOT a Virtue" Award - You have the ability to take Carlos out of play and you convince them to wait. Not cool, Ryan.
Best Back Story - Vee has a Russian brother locked in prison / Tae killed a guy when he was 12 / Javier's parents died in a factory fire
The "Your Whole Family's Doomed" Award - If Carlos is the future of this gang, either they will all be in jail and the gang will be gone or crazy is the new way of the streets. / If Daniel is your money guy, you'll all be broke in 6months after he invests it all in a Ponzi scheme.
Mama for the Win - Marciela convinces Javier not to retaliate because she doesn't want any more of her children in the crossfire
The "Congratulations, You Started a Gang War" Award - Not only did Ryan NOT get Carlos killed but he ignited a gang war as a bonus. Nice night's work, buddy.
Most Interesting Twist - I never really thought about used needles being an issue for cops raiding a drug bust. I've never seen this addressed before so it adds freshness to a stale genre.
The "Are You Kidding Me?" Award - Why the heck are they allowing that kid to use her cell phone? That's the first things you confiscate. I swear Mary and Marshall from In Plain Sight would read you the riot act. Then they let the family stand around outside to hug each other when any good sniper could take them out.
Most Disgusting - the guy with the missing eyeballs
Weekly Shows:
It's impossible to count how many head shakes and eye rolls this episode received. In fact, my eyes are still rolling. This is a classic case of a show not knowing when to end. The death of Margot should have been the finale. Now we've got Chinese massacre, Russian hit men, nuclear sub missile launch, and who knows what else. If they save the world from aliens by uploading a computer virus, I won't be surprised. After all why not aliens? They've thrown in everything else.
Grade: C
Best Scene - Kate threatens to kill Navarro in order to break him
Best Quote - Jack: "Just so we're clear, I wasn't asking. That was me being courteous."
Best Reason to Watch - It's now hit defcon 2 in ludicrous so from here on out it's all about how ridiculous it gets. Yep, 24:LAD has now become a comedy.
Biggest Shock - the dead geek squad
Best Reason to Fast Forward - I think I would like Mark's subplot better if it weren't based on being jealous of his wife's ex. There are plenty of legitimate reasons to hand Jack over to the Russians. Use one.
Most Manipulative - Adrian, who if he's a true believer is scary. If he's not, he's brilliant and psychotic.
The "Are You Kidding Me?" Award - Once again, if half the world wants the device Navarro has, why isn't everybody on the case? British and American troops should be swarming all over.
The "What an Idiot!" Award - Chloe's big plan was to flag down a trucker and scream? Really? All while Adrian is standing 50 feet away. Channel your inner Hermione and say it with me. "What an idiot!"
Most Ludicrous - Take your pick. The Chinese massacre, the Russian truck ramming, the fact that the bad guys can never hit anything, nuclear submarine fire orders, etc. It's like the writers couldn't pick one story and go with it so they took every spy novel ever written. I seriously would not be surprised if a bad guy let Kim's cougar out to roam the streets of London.
The Last Ship continued its intensity and even improved the pacing this week. Definitely my favorite new show of the summer. While this one wasn't as much character development as last time, Danny especially got his moments. They also brought on a new character, Tex, who so far is a lot of fun. Plus I really liked him as James on Burn Notice so that is a plus too. Mostly though it was the explosions and gunfire that made the night. I think it was a wise plan to spread the action out into 3 different areas. Not so sure about Al-Qaida still being around though. Here's hoping that The Last Ship continues to thrill as we learn more about the virus and the state of the world.
Grade: A-
Best Scene - the warehouse standoff
Best Quote - Tom: "Well now see we've got a bit of a problem with that because there's one thing from the old world that still applies today. Something that will never change. We don't negotiate with terrorists."
Best Reason to Watch - the continued great pacing and intense situations. Plus mega explosions, emergency surgery, and gunfire. Woo hoo!
Best Aww Scene - the prayer vigil via glow stick and cell phone pictures of their loved ones / Danny breaks down to Kara
Worst Plan - Out of all the people you can bring on this vital mission, you take the guy who keeps messing up? Are there no qualified people?
The "Are You Kidding Me?" Award - 80% of the world is dead and we're still dealing with Al-Qaida
New Tag Line - Stay frosty!
The "Just Take Everything" Award - Why are you wasting time by picking and choosing things? Get as many huge bags as you can. Dump everything in. Take them out. Get more bags. It's simple.
Most Disgusting - Rats eating bodies? Nope, did not need to see that. Really did not.
Hokiest Line - Tom: "Revenge is best served cold." Tex: "Let's eat."
In all honesty, I was about to give up on this show. It has all the elements of bad hospital dramas. The screwed up doctor, the stupid love triangles and general neuroses, the hyperbolic situations and ludicrous plots - yep, all present. But this episode was different. Better. It's not even the hyped up coming out episode, although that was done well. It was that for once I cared about many of the characters enough to stop playing Free Cell to get me through the episode. Now sure I still want to fast forward through all things TC and Jordan, and alas, even Scott. But I was fascinated by the subplot of the private screwing up his courage to ask Krista out and her agreeing. I was moved by both Drew and Krista's breaking down scenes. If Night Shift could be more human drama instead of annoying Grey's Anatomy Light, I'd want to continue watching. As it is, I'm only watching for Topher and Drew now.
Grade: B+
Best Scene - Drew breaks down to Krista about feeling helpless
Biggest Aww Scene - the mariachi band plays Tops as they wheel out Private Wilson's body and Krista breaks down
Best Quote - Ragosa: "I met my wife in high school." Kenny: "Yeah well unless you want to get arrested, you need to meet the next woman someplace else."
Best Reason to Watch - Drew's conflicted feelings
Biggest Reason to Fast Forward - the freaking love triangle and more potential love drama
Biggest Ouch - Rick goes to grab Drew's hand but he won't let him
Best Speech - Krista telling Drew to man up and he does
Taken as a whole, this episode makes zero sense logically. Not even a little. There is more plot hole than actual substance, so much so it topples in the slightest of winds. But let's face it, it was fun and that's the #1 thing I ask of Teen Wolf. It could be the the premiere dud makes me like it even more, but I'm handing kudos out to Sheriff for bringing the fun and the writers for snappier dialogue. Plus there are so many confusing moments they all kind of blur together into one Jell-O-y mess and therefore kind of fade into the background. Besides since the chances of anyone explaining what happened in this episode are about the same as Derek winning another fight next week, we get to speculate on everything. Teen Wolf, living in the Cave of Dropped Plot Points since 2011. I will say that this episode has sparked a renewed desire to rewatch season 1 and 2 again, since I could have sworn that Derek and Kate got together after high school.
Grade: B+
Best Action - the pack versus berserkers
Best Quote - Peter: "Can't someone in this town stay dead?" Malia: "I think they were hoping you would."
Best Reason to Watch - if you don't, you won't know all the many, many questions you should be asking right now
Best Awww Moment - Teen Derek leaps to Scott's rescue even if he doesn't know who he is
Biggest Shock - They actually let Derek win a fight / Beacon Hills High has a Bat Cave
Biggest Continuity - Lydia deathwalks / Stiles names Derek Miguel again
Least Stealthy - Scott should use his werewolf sight instead of stumbling around and waking DoucheDad
Wonkiest Class - Beacon Hills history went from WW2 to Jimmy Carter and then back to WW2 and now it's Lincoln. History is now called Plot Device 101, since its prime function is to teach the lesson of the day.
Biggest Huh - After the kanima, alpha pack, Darach, Mummy Mouth, and DarkStiles, this season the Big Bad is…a thief? Say what?
The "Just Shut Up Already" Award - Stiles manages to make this dinner about 10,000 times more awkward
Best New Addition - berserkers, who make all the logic pain go away with a good fight
Best Entrance - Kira and her swordplay before she's taken down too
The best thing about this episode is that Jane is no longer sneaking around about the pregnancy. It means characters can stop tip toeing and make progress. While the case of the week was a lame, the family dynamics worked. Jane has a great support system and now that they all know it should be fun seeing how much help Jane can stand from them.
Grade: B-
Best Scene - Jane and Maura at the yoga class
Best Quote - Frankie: "Can't a brother just give a sister a hand?" Jane: "Yeah, if he wants to lose it."
Best Reason to Watch - everyone trying to help Jane in their own way / catching everyone up on pregnancy
The "Say What? Award - the officer get shot in the leg and he looks like he's smiling through it as he casually gives details. Shouldn't that hurt?
Hardest Moment - Korsak gives Jane a file of people to replace Frost
Funniest Moment - Tommy and Maura talk about putting together baby equipment
Best Moment - Jane tells Korsak she's pregnant / Jane and Maura jump and click their heels
Most Surprising - Korsak was in a band that actually produced an album
Best Character - Korsak
Best Threat - Jane threatens to name the baby after her mother's hated cousin if she blabs to anyone
That was one of the weirdest episodes of Perception I've ever seen. Cannibalism - check. Stupid criminals - check. Family trauma - check. Bank robbery, learning disabled kid, burning corpses - check, check, and check. Plus commentary on the Roman Catholic church and Daniel's dad showed up. To say this episode was packed is an understatement and yet part of the pacing felt off. Mostly though this felt like one of those "shocker" episodes where the crime is so farfetched that you know they only wanted to push buttons. It's a shame because this episode would have benefitted from toning down instead of ramping up the crime of the week. The real highlight here is Daniel's relationship with his father and more time should have been focused on that.
Grade: B-
Best Scene - Daniel's dad tells him he has Alzheimer's
Best Aww Moment - Dillon hugs Daniel even though he clearly doesn't want him to / Daniel and Dillon play together
Best Quote - Shane: "Yeah but I looked on the internet. Everything matched." Daniel: "Yeah did ya? Next time try talking to an actual human being, preferably one who went to medical school."
Best Reason to Watch - Daniel and his dad
The "Um, huh?" Award - Just when I thought nothing could be more confusing than Teen Wolf this week, Perception gives me two people robbing banks to give the money to a dead kid's dad to make up for scamming him years ago. And they ate the kid's flesh.
Cutest Kid - Dillon
Stupidest Criminal - He decided to take up bank robbery after self-diagnosing on Web MD? Idiot!
Most in Need of Tact - Daniel, always
Best Smooth Talker - Donnie, who says everything right which would normally make me very suspicious
Young & Hungry works best for me when Yolanda and Sofia take up most of the screen time. Since that will never happen, I need the other characters to step in. Sadly while Yolanda had some great scenes, Sofia wasn't in it much. More Sofia please, let's tone Caroline down a bit, and for the sake of my sanity either out the secret fling or stop referencing it. Friends pretty much sucked when they were "on a break" too.
Grade: C+
Best Scene - video of Elliot snatching the ring
Funniest Scene - Gabi air pumping the duck. Is that really a thing? Who knew?
Best Quote - Gabi: "I just wish I'd had a tad more notice and been a tad more truthful on my resume."
Best Reason to Watch - Yolanda
The "Yeah, Never Touching What You Cook" Award - the 5 second rule should never be part of a chef's vocabulary. In fact no one over 8 should use it.
The "Shut Up" Award - Gabi keeps talking herself into trouble instead of out of it
Most Distractible - Caroline, who makes ADHD kindergarteners look laser-focused
Biggest Personality Shift - Josh, who suddenly went from teddy bear to finally telling Caroline to knock it off
It's a really bad time to be in Vega. You end up with dead sister drop offs or constant threats. The lion has more fun than you do and eats better too. You just might be bartered for a Bill of Rights. Anyone else find that ironic? It's not much better outside the city proper. There you get beheaded or your weepy angel companion get stabbed. Actually this particular future just sucks out loud. I blame angels, especially Gabriel who is crowned King of the Douches and he has a full court. I can't be the only one who finds Gabriel's moustache twirling annoying, right? Other than that we got a real reason for Alex to return, a faint whiff of mytharc, and a surprise re-engagement. Oh how I fear for you all.
Grade: B+
Best Scene - Claire confronts her dad about the detention of V-1s and he finally tells her he's sick
Best Quote - William: "Good for Sampson and good for those cubs. Surely they will be raised by their mother and not actually know their father. Nature is kind every once in awhile, isn't it?"
Best Laugh - Michael calls shotgun
Least Surprising - Gabriel takes offense to Furiad trying to off his brother
The "If That's the Initiation, Then No Thanks" Award - Cracking someone's ribs just doesn't seem like a good welcome party.
Most in Need of a Bell - If Alex is the Chosen One, shouldn't someone keep track of him?
The "You've Turned Me Off Pudding" Award - Oh Gabriel, I now see pudding as an after massacre snack. It's revolting, especially after Dean Winchester made pudding mean something altogether different.
Coolest Reason to be an Angel - Wing shields make you bulletproof
Biggest Hmmm - Do you find New Delphi by following the yellow brick road? Is it in wonderland? I bet it's flowing with milk and honey. Alex honey, you're building this place up too big in your mind.
The "You Know You've Read Too Much Joseph Campbell When…" - you think the only way someone can be a hero is by being orphaned and abandoned
The "Back in the Middle Ages" Award - Nothing like bartering yourself for politics. Claire, I think you might be a 15th century princess.
Grade: B
Best Scene - Cab ride with Leo, Cait, a criminal, and Cait's mother
Best Awww Scene - Cait calms Leo down about his claustrophobia
Best Quote - Criminal: "Hey how you doing sweet thing?" Frankie: "Excuse me, I am old enough o be your mother." Criminal: "I'm cool with that if you are."
Best Reason to Watch - Leo's driving
Best Character - still Frankie
Most Bizarre - roofied Cait
Biggest Douche - Cait, I have no idea what her freaking problem is but someone needs to Gibbs smack her.
The "And There's the Crux of the Problem" Award - Cait: "I'm a cop. I can do whatever I want."
The "If You're Going to Run from Cops, You'd Best be in Shape" Award - Seriously dude, if you're panting you might as well quit right now.
The "Way to Ruin Your Own Cliffhanger" Award - So you have Leo getting taken out by ICE but then show him driving the cab in the promos for next week. I'm guessing he's not detained for long.
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