Monday, October 24, 2016

Quote of the Week - Week of Oct. 16

A weekly feature highlighting the best quotes on TV as picked by the Spoiler TV team. We'd love to hear your picks too so please sound off in the comments below.

Agents of SHIELD -
1. Jemma: "You can't have it both ways, Daisy. You can't push us away and then come crawling back half-dead only when you feel like it. It isn't fair. You've already put a gun to my head. We are in this together now so suck it up!" (Swanpride)
2. Daisy: “Whoever’s working in the terrible ideas division is crushing it.” (Swanpride)
3. Robbie: "Funny, I was gonna say the same thing without the accent." (Swanpride)

The Blacklist -
1. Dembe: "It won't come." Red: "What?' Dembe: "Forgiveness for Kate, for what I did." Red: "You did nothing." Dembe: "Exactly."
2. Ressler: "You know who she is and you're gonna give her that?" Hitchins: "Yes, Agent Ressler, he does but apparently you've forgotten. 'She' is your boss' boss' boss' boss." Ressler: "Well my boss' boss' boss' boss is a killer. See I know you murdered Reven Wright and one day, I'm gonna prove it."
3. Liz: "You don't have to apologize for trying to find our daughter."

Brooklyn 99 -
1. Captain Holt: "Who do you work for, pizza man!? (Justyna)

Conviction -
1. Tess: "Don't throw it away because your boss is being a b**." (Marko Pekic, Zandarl, and Dahne)
2. Hayes: "Get the crime board ready I need to take a quick shower and change my underwear. Kidding. I never wear underwear." (Zandarl)
3. Hayes: "I'm sorry. Did I sleep through the repeal of the First Amendment? Being a hateful jacka** isn't grounds for four life sentences." (Dahne)
4. Frankie: "He's experienced enough to know it's not like making brownies. You don't just toss in an extra pinch of nitrogen." (Dahne)
5. CTU Guy: "I just wanted to talk." Maxine: "And you thought wearing a ski mask was a good ice breaker?" (Dahne)

The Flash -
1. Barry: "What’s Dad Cop?" Joe: "There’s good cop, bad cop and dad cop. Firm but reassuring. Cuts to the point." Barry: "I don’t think I know that one." Joe: "Yeah, I didn’t use it on you. Wally’s different from you. Barry, you’re like a second daughter. You overshare your feelings. Him I gotta be a little more nuanced." Barry: "Huh, cool." Joe: "I’m messing with you." (Prpleight)

Fresh Off the Boat -
1. Emory: "You signed me up for Karate Club." Eddie: "If you want to do karate, you should do karate." Emory: "And you're okay with that? I don't want to embarrass you." Eddie: "Who cares what I think? Who cares what anyone thinks? You do you, dawg. I'll just keep on putting those cracks in the jade ceiling."
2. Jessica: "Do you have experience with those? They are very delicate. They are arranged in a certain tableau. Each angle tells a different story." Mary: "Are they discussing the dust storm that just hit them?" Jessica: "They're covered in the fog of resiliency."
3. Evan: "Emory's not like you. He just wants to be himself and you're not letting him." Eddie: "Why? Because I'm blazing trails and breaking chains." Evan: "You're breaking your brother's spirit. He's just Emory. Stop making him feel bad for being who he is."

1. Michaela (to Drake): "Go anywhere near my bag or anyone else's in this room and your laptop won't be all you're missing, you spineless, tiny-balled, whiny excuse of a man! Walk away." (Laura Markus and Dahne)
2. Sam: "You were 13. You didn't know what you were doing." Frank: "I planned it for weeks, waited for the perfect moment. Looked forward to it and when it was over and he was under that car, screaming like an animal in a trap, my only thought was, 'You idiot, Frank. You couldn't even kill him right.' Now tell me I should get out of here." Sam: "You should." Frank: "Then you're even more of a sociopath than I am." Sam: "Sociopaths don't cry over what they did, Frank. Hey. You have good in you, okay? Just like all of us and I'm here to finally help you see that. You have good in you." (Dahne)
3. Annalise: "You sure you don't want the ashes? I mean we can cook them into slop, feed it to pigs, or just spread them in the worst place imaginable." (Dahne)

Jane the Virgin -
1. Narrator: “How does knowing the end affect the journey? Because some of you know how this is going to end.” (Emma)
2. Jane: “So sorry to bug you but the doctor just gave us an update and I think I was in shock and I didn’t ask anything but now I’m prepared. So I was wondering if I could talk to a doctor, any doctor. It doesn’t even have to be one of your good ones.” (Emma)
3. Michael: “Wait, who are you?... I’m just kidding.” (Emma)

Lethal Weapon -
1. Bailey: "Look, I just got a call from Riggs and I don't know if he's kidding, but..." Avery: "What is it?" Bailey: "He's asking for backup." Avery: "Send everyone - SWAT, hostage negotiators, everyone!" (Justyna and Dahne)
2. Trish: "Do you realize how many mistakes he made before lunch? Experience trumps youth every day of the week." Roger: "Tell that to my knees." (Dahne)
3. Riggs: "Hey, Rog?" Roger: "Yeah?" Riggs: "I kind of feel like talking some more." Roger: "Don't you dare ruin this moment." (Dahne)
4. Riggs: "I'm not leaving so you want to take them out, you're gonna have my blood on your hands, too."
Murtaugh: "Mine, too. You tried to kill me twice so I'm sure it doesn't have the same impact, but we're in this together." (Dahne)

Lucifer -
1. Lucifer: “So, I need a favor.” Maze: “Favors are your thing not mine.” Lucifer: "All right then what about a wager.” Maze: “What’s in it for me?” Lucifer: “Whatever you want.” Maze: “Your convertible.” Lucifer: “Fine, but you need to take the detective out and have fun. Three drinks should do it.” Maze: "Sucker's bet. Easy." Lucifer: "Yes, but you’re not allowed to tie her up and pour booze down her throat." Maze: "Less easy." (Prpleight)

MacGyver -
1. Mac: "I actually think I might have a solution to this, but it's... it's kind of risky." Jack: "What kind of risky?" Mac: "The 'it might derail the whole thing instantly killing everyone on board' kind." Jack: "Okay, good. We'll call that Plan A and not do that. What's Plan B?"
2. Jack: "Well you'll be happy to know that Thorton and I have talked about getting you some more field training, but don't worry. Once we're done with you, you'll make Jason Bourne look like Matt Damon."
3. Mac: "We're gonna have to move back to Plan C." Jack: "Plan C? Plan C went out the window 8 operatives and a helicopter ago. We're on, like Plan F right now, dude."

Supernatural -
1. Mary: "I just have so much about you boys to catch up on. Mother stuff, you know - first tooth, first crush." Sam: "Yeah." Mary: "I just have a lot of blanks to fill in." Sam: "Right, uh...Dad's journal. His writing, his words helped me fill in some blanks and answer some questions I didn't know I had and you know, it… keeps him with us sort of." Mary: "Thank you." Sam: "Good night." Mary: "Dean said you got out of hunting." Sam: "Yeah." Mary: "And yet here you are." Sam: "Well this is my family. My family hunts, you know? It's what we do. Mom, for me, just…um, having you here fills in the biggest blank."
2. Crowley: "What's the bloody hold up? He's the one and only Satan in the phonebook." Rowena: "It's witchcraft, not Google Maps."
3. Dean: "She was using a Chinese mind control technique. Hard to do when you're unconscious. Turns out this ape did read a book or two."

Westworld -
1. Bernard: "This pain, it’s all I have left of him." (Justyna)
2. Dolores: "There aren't two versions of me. There's only one. And I think when I discover who I am, I'll be free." (Darth Locke)
3. Bernard: "I guess people want to read about the things they want the most and experience the least." (Darth Locke)
3. Dolores: “You said someday. Not today or tomorrow or next week. Just someday. “Someday” sounds a lot like the thing people say when they actually mean 'never'." (Darth Locke)

Younger -
1. Taylor: "My manager says that dense historical fiction isn't trending so for now I'm stuck acting like a drunk child while I pay off the rest of my student debt."
2. Josh: "Did they all go to the same plastic surgeon? Because they all look exactly the same." Liza: "Inbreeding. The 1% likes to keep the bloodlines closed."
3. Liza (about the Stoopid Girls): "They're gonna save the publishing industry?"

About the Author - Dahne
One part teacher librarian - one part avid TV fan, Dahne is a contributing writer for SpoilerTV, where she recaps, reviews, and/or creates polls for Teen Wolf, The 100, Grimm, How to Get Away with Murder, The Librarians, and others. She also runs the annual Character Cup. She's addicted to Twitter, live tweets a multitude of shows each week, and co-hosts The 100 "Red-Shirted" and Teen Wolf "Welcome to Beacon Hills" podcasts for Southgate Media Group. Currently she writes a Last Week in TV column for her blog and SpoilerTV. ~ "I speak TV."
Recent Reviews (All Reviews)

Last Week in TV - Week of October 16 - Reviews and Awards

Hello and welcome back to Last Week in TV. This week was a mixed bag for me. I had the opportunity to catch up on some shows, decided to drop a couple, and of course, am behind on a dozen more. Some things never change. With the last couple network pilots airing this week, I should be narrowing down my weekly viewing list and that's always a good time. As such, I've added a short section at the bottom about shows that I will no longer be reviewing, or at least not until I marathon them. So have you added dropped anything from your list this week? Anything coming on the horizon that you are anticipating? As for the nominated episode for next week, something happened for the first time. The random number generator picked an episode that I have already reviewed - Sherlock's The Sign of Three. My review of it can be found here. Therefore I ran the generator a second time and I'm heading back to my TV past with an episode from season 6 of The X-Files that focuses on Skinner. I always liked that character. If you have an episode you would like to nominate, please fill out the short 2-question form below. Until then, happy TV viewing!

Best Show You're Not Watching

Pitch - 1.02 / 1.03 / 1.04 - The Interim / Beanball / The Break

Sadly, because I was behind on this show, episode 4 doesn't qualify for Episode of the Week but it still deserves kudos and it's not even the best episode of the bunch. Therefore, we're throwing back to an award I used to give out when the column first started. Pitch is the best show you're (probably) not watching. I think the whole concept is a hard sell because those interested in sports are less likely to be pulled in by the drama, while some into drama might be put off by the sports theme. I'm here to tell you that there is something here for everyone. First, it starts with good characters. I was less than thrilled with the characterizations in the pilot because they went long on build up and short on characters. The next 3 episodes more than make up for that. They have especially done a great job with the mentoring bond between Lawson and Ginny. Not only does it flesh out both characters well, but it also gives the story an anchor. Plus, it's not all one-sided, which helps tremendously. Ginny gets great advice on how to navigate stardom and someone in her corner, while Mike gets purpose and perspective. His character could have been a stereotype of the veteran threatened by the rookie, but they went so much deeper than that and made his character the heart of the entire team. It's a role Gosselaar feels born to play. The show also fleshes out some of the other main characters well like Al, Oscar, Blip, and Evelyn. We've only got the barest taste of Amelia but I find her compelling as well. In fact, this is a real shocker. I don't even mind that Amelia and Lawson are sleeping together. I have no idea why but they just click for me. Still Evelyn is my favorite character because she knows when to support and when to lay it all on the line. She's a lifeline for both Ginny and her husband and that's a thankless job that she takes on with both grace and laughter. If you are not watching this show or if you dropped it after the pilot, I'd suggest giving it a try. You don't have to like baseball to get wrapped up in the struggle to find yourself in the midst of instant fame or the universal story of what to do next when one stage of your life is ending.

Grade: B+

Best Reason to Watch - the character interactions
Best Aww Scene - Ginny's mom says she's there for Ginny no matter what when she's a kid
Best Character Interaction - Lawson and Ginny by an earth length
Best Speech - Lawson calling out his teammates for being idiotic babies / Evelyn tells Blip that she is by far the most supportive wife when he's being selfish
Best Motivational Partner / Best Wife - Evelyn
Best Brother - Will
Best Play - Al makes firing him about putting Ginny in a bad light and it's the smartest play of the day
Best Back Story - Al's pity date story
Best Reference - Jerry Maguire
Worst Reference - the movie Just One of the Guys
Worst Back Story - Ginny's mom's affair
Worst Apology but He's Trying - Al to Ginny
Most Gruesome but Poignant Symbol - the cut off head of a doll used as a ball
Most Awkward - Ginny gets the call up to the All-Stars instead of Blip
Most Misguided Knight - Trevor calls off the pitcher to walk Ginny instead of hitting her (bean bagging)
Most Multi-Talented - Al, who also speaks Korean
Most Likely to Play Hardball - Maxine
Most Needed Scene - Lawson with his ex-wife
Biggest Order - Al pretty much tells Lawson to fix the whole team
Biggest Jerk - Bill Baker, who basically orders Ginny to choose between him or her mom
The "Poor Baby" Award - Oscar and his daughter Daniella talking about her parents getting a divorce
The "I Call Foul" Award - This is obviously written by men who are jealous of the Cardinals' overall success. I'm not exactly unbiased either, but comparatively, the Cardinals have a whole lot better sportsmanship than most professional teams, especially those on the coasts. Let your jealousy flag fly, writers. :-P
The "I See Both Sides" Award - Rachel makes sense about using Ginny's stardom to discuss big issues. Ginny makes sense when it comes to her having to live every day in her new life.
The "Way to Make Everything Worse" Award - Katie Nolan for making Ginny's teammates out to be babies and misogynists. Like earning their trust isn't hard enough.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Wendie Malick from Rush Hour / BJ Britt, who was Trip on SHIELD / JoAnna Garcia Swisher from Privileged and Reba / Shamier Anderson from Wynonna Earp / Kelly Jenrette from Grandfathered / Darius McCrary from Family Matters

Best Quotes -
1. Lawson: "Do I look like I play golf?" Ginny: "You look like a cousin from Duck Dynasty." Lawson: "You love the beard."
2. Evelyn: "Yeah, she doesn't date ballplayers." Trevor: "Well she stuck me out 3 times tonight so clearly I'm no ballplayer." Ginny: "You're trying to strike out a fourth time?"
3. Ginny: "A woman's not responsible for her own sexual assault because she went in the wrong locker room. That's not only wrong. It's dangerous. We don't need to make sure that every girl goes in the right room. We need to make sure every boy knows it's wrong to rape."
4. Lawson: "So maybe...we all start working as hard as her. Maybe we start acting like a team instead of a bunch of spoiled brats and maybe I'll feel lucky that you guys are all I have. Yeah, lucky to be a Padre with every last flickering minute of my damn career."
5. Evelyn: "You came back." Blip: "Biggest moment of my life...June 6, 2007. I was playing on the USC baseball team. I bought a bacon burger from this sassy freshman at the concession stand. I wasn't even hungry. I just bought it 'cause I wanted to talk to the prettiest girl I'd ever seen." Evelyn: "What a coincidence. That was my moment, too."
6. Amelia: "I don't know much about baseball, but I do know that it's bad form to play an All-Star game without pants."
7. Evelyn: "Look at me, Sanders. The only all-star team that matters is mine and you're already the leading vote-getter there."
8. Evelyn: "Hey, hey, hey, keep it down. I'm trying to decide what theme park tickets we should get." Blip: "Go with whichever one makes the money magically disappear less."
9. Ginny: "You're abandoning me in my hour of need." Evelyn: "Mmm yeah, no. I'm immune to guilt. Chicken pox and guilt, neither of them get me anymore."
10. Reid: "You think I hired you as my GM just cause you're good at your job?" Oscar: "I hope so." Reid: "Well that and you look like Spanish Superman." Oscar: "I'm Mexican."

Nominated Episode

Prison Break - 1.01 - Pilot
~~~Coming soon, reviews of the original series by Bwhit

And people say the Winchester brothers are co-dependent? I think Michael and Lincoln will be right up there with them and they haven't even begun the bromance in this pilot. While I'm sure that plot holes start showing the further along this massive conspiracy theory goes, the pilot is tightly constructed to give a taste of one man's ultimate sacrifice to save his brother. The pacing is decent and covers the basis without staying in any scene for too long. It doesn't delve into the rescue plan at all or even give a solid reason as to why Michael's willing to take such a risk, but it introduces the key players nicely and sets up a bare bones of the story structure. In the center is Michael, the well-adjusted and successful engineer, who decides what he really needs to do is get thrown in jail to help his brother. Somewhere in the shadows is his death-row inmate and older brother Lincoln, who dispenses dime store wisdom to his soon to be juvenile delinquent son. (Seriously, he needs to dial down the Dr. Phil.) It's immediately clear that Lincoln's the Dean Winchester to Michael's Sam, right down to the debilitating self-esteem crisis. He actually compares himself to an anchor at one point, dragging down everyone in his life. My guess is that this is why the brothers seem to be estranged when they were obviously close earlier. To keep it all in the neighborhood, Michael's baffled lawyer is also Lincoln's former lover, Veronica. Michael asks her to go all conspiracy theory for Lincoln but she declines until an anti-death penalty priest is murdered, bringing in the requisite secret, evil government group. Overall, I liked the episode and the characters are intriguing even if I have zero idea how most of them fit into the narrative. I'm a bit more hesitant about the brother relationship at this time though because Lincoln never appears to be grateful or even that concerned about Michael. I do realize that this will change but the absence of much emotion from Lincoln in their big reunion did stifle it a bit for me. I'm also not sure that all the conspiracy is going to work in the long run. Call it being The X-Files gun shy, but I've been burned by excessive serialization before.

Grade: B
Ranking: 4
Audience - people who like serialized mysteries with a huge wallop of bromance thrown in
Bottom Line - I'm looking forward to watching more of this series if for the brothers alone, but it won't be until after the new version begins.

Best Reason to Watch / Best Character - Michael is very intriguing even if his methods seem extreme
Best Scene - Veronica tries to talk some sense into Michael but later ends up following the conspiracy theory like Michael asked her to
Best Action - prison yard fight
Best Plot Device - by giving Lincoln very little time to live, they ramp up the tension nicely for season 1
Worst Plan - Michael turns down the warden's offer to make life easier because he needs to get on Abruzzi's work team (???)
Biggest Huh? - Since when do death row prisoners get work detail? Shouldn't he be in solitary?
Biggest Surprise - Michael just voluntarily tells his cellmate that Lincoln's his brother
Biggest Product Placement - White Castle
Most Tense - Lincoln's relationship with…well, just about everyone in his life
Most Charming - Michael with Sara because medical is obviously part of the escape plan
Most Stereotypical - the guards are mostly corrupt
Most Shady - Kellerman and Hale
Most Gutsy - Michael rests his brother and his life on breaking them out of prison
Least Successful Criminal - LJ, who picks up drugs at a police bust
Least Likely to Cave - the bishop
The " Say What?" Award - Michael gave up everything for his brother but when they get a chance to talk, they don't sound like they even like each other. There's got to be some serious water under that bridge.
The "You Know You're Truly Evil When…" Award - you kill a Bishop because you're afraid he'll keep you from executing someone else
The "Poor Baby" Award - Michael when Lincoln tells him he is going to be executed
The "Welcome Back" Award - Wentworth Miller from the CW / Dominic Purcell from LoT / Stacy Keach from Mike Hammer and The Blue and the Gray / Sarah Wayne Callis from The Walking Dead / Amaury Nolasco from Telenovela / Robert Knepper from Cult and Arrow / Robin Tunney from The Mentalist / Anthony Starke from Make it or Break It / Rockmond Dunbar from The Mentalist / Peter Stormare from The Blacklist and Graceland / Chelcie Ross from Christy / Jessalyn Gilsig from Vikings and Glee / Camille Guaty from Scorpion

Best Quotes -
1. Lisa: "Oh where is this coming from, LJ? Last semester you were getting almost all A's and now you're…it's your father, isn't it?" LJ: "I don't have a father." Lisa: "It wasn't an immaculate conception, honey. Trust me."
2. Sara: "I've got news for you, Michael. 'Trust me' means absolutely zero inside these walls. The only way you're getting that insulin is if I'm administering it."
3. Lincoln: "You mean what you said earlier?" Michael: "I'm not here on vacation. Trust me."
4. Michael: "I'm looking for someone. Guy named Lincoln Burrows." C-Note: "Linc the sink." Michael: "That what they're calling him now?" C-Note: "Yeah as in he'll come at you with everything but the kitchen."
5. Veronica: "I deserve to know. I loved him as much as you did." Michael: "Past tense for you maybe, not me."

Featured Reviewers

Agents of SHIELD - 4.04 - Let Me Stand Next to Your Fire
BY Swanpride 

The show was on fire this week - pun totally intended, especially since this episode was so quotable. Nearly every line was a zinger without feeling forced. While Agents of SHIELD is perfectly capable of balancing multiple storylines at once, the show tends to work the best when most of them take a backseat to one big story. This week the Inhumans arc meets the Ghostrider arc in one big mash-up, which allowed a lot of action-packed opportunities to play out beautifully, if a little bit understated in certain points. I admit, I was a little bit disappointed that Lola stayed firmly on the ground. Where the show truly shined was in the character moments in-between, including a much needed telling-off Daisy got from multiple characters. But I was especially celebrating when the show passed up on a round of needless relationship drama. After three seasons of teasing, there is nothing more I want to see than Fitzsimmons being happy together with their hardwood floor and their breakfast nook, and I am incredible pleased that this is what we get.

Grade: A-

Best Reason to Watch - A firework of action and careful plotting.
Best Scene - Jemma recognizing Aida as android immediately
Best Character - Jemma is the boss!
Best Fight - Hellfire vs. Ghostrider, naturally
Best Team-up - I wanted to see Daisy and Jemma on a mission together for ages.
Best Effects - Ghostrider catching the flaming chain.
Best Prop - The Shotgun axe has a comeback, and it still looks absolutely bada**
Most Snarky - Coulson was on fire this week (pun still absolutely intended)
Most Welcome - The wayward daughter being back with the team
Most Obvious - Hands up. Who else wasn't surprised at all that James turned out to be a traitor?
Most Random Observation - Naturally May would like Aida. Though somehow the notion of an android which pretends to have feelings is more creepy than one which actually has them. After all, isn't pretending to act like a sociable human being what psychopaths often do?
Prediction of the Week - I am just waiting for the next shoe to drop regarding Aida. Though I don't worry about the lie detector test, I have the feeling that something will happen so that Jemma gets out of it. Otherwise I guess we are back to the Ghost story next week...time to prepare the tie-in for Doctor Strange, right?

Best Quote:
1. Jemma: "You can't have it both ways, Daisy. You can't push us away and then come crawling back half-dead only when you feel like it. It isn't fair. You've already put a gun to my head. We are in this together now so suck it up!"
2. Daisy: “Whoever’s working in the terrible ideas division is crushing it.”
3. Robbie: "Funny, I was gonna say the same thing without the accent."
4. Mac: "Did two fire dudes just drop into a warehouse full of fireworks?" Coulson: "Yeah, you had to have seen that coming."
5.Fitz: "That is an odd thing to say about a person." Jemma: "Fitz, she is an android. You know that she is an android, right?"

Jane the Virgin - – 3.01 – Chapter Forty-Five
BY Emma 

This season’s premiere had to juggle several storylines but as usual, our narrator gets us caught up on all the plot threads and we dive right in with Michael’s condition. Over the summer hiatus, most of the show’s buzz pertained to Michael’s survival. Since this is a telenovela and not a “death is normal dystopian” or “time-travel-will-fix-it” show, I was 99.9% sure he would not only survive, but have minimal long term physical complications. Good news, I was right on both counts but the even better news is the writers used the time honored amnesia trope to bring some humor to an otherwise heavy episode instead of introducing it as a tired subplot. We also see some real personal growth in Rafael this hour. Not only does he support Jane and take care of Mateo so she can focus on Michael, he ends things with Petra (well, who he thinks is Petra) instead of continuing a physical relationship with her to ease his pain over losing Jane permanently. The S1 Rafael would not have been so mature. Xo and Rogelio also had some great character moments – Xo came clean to Rogelio about her pregnancy, including who the father is and Rogelio remained supportive despite how much it obviously hurt him. Last but not least, Rose and Luisa are on a submarine and not likely to be caught anytime soon. However, Luisa seems to be unaware of how she got on the sub. Did she turn down Rose’s offer to run and Rose abducted her in her determination to have their Happily Ever After? Or was Luisa complicit in being drugged as a condition of them running away together? Either way, I am a huge Bridget Regan fan and her chemistry with Yara Martinez is off the charts so anything that keeps them together and on the run longer is fine by me. Overall, great premiere that hit all the major plot points with the heart and humor I’ve come to expect from this show.

Grade: A-
Number of Scenes that Made Me Cry/Teary: 2

Best Reason to Watch – the journey to finding out Michael is alive
Best Scene – Jane’s pep-talk to an unconscious Michael before he goes into surgery
Best Backstory – Jane and Michael’s first love triangle and how Michael fought for Jane
Best Twist – Rose and Luisa are on a submarine and Luisa doesn’t seem to know how she got there
Best Revenge (flashback) – Michael pulls over Jane and her date after she called off sick to go on a date with another guy and he sees her leave with him when bringing her soup
Best Effects – countdown to the Petra-chicken basting
Best Reaction – Michael holding Jane to her deathbed promise of getting a cat
Best Use of Flash-Forwards – adorable future cat pictures
Best Code – Fry the Onion Rings = take down Rafael / Baste the Chicken = Inject Petra with paralytic
Best Hashtag – #EsteBunInTheOven
Best Silver Lining – Jane and Michael’s mom find some common ground
Most Heartbreaking – Jane begging Michael to stay with her
Most Supportive – Rogelio, offering to be there for Xo no matter what she decides about the baby
Least Surprising – Xo doesn’t plan on keeping the baby
Biggest “Oops” – mistaking Rogelio for Erik Estrada
Biggest Laugh – Rogelio being mistaken for Erik Estrada
Weirdest Confession – Xo confesses she’s pregnant with Esteban’s baby when she says she can’t pee in a cup to give to two stoners because the testing facility would know it wasn’t theirs because of the pregnancy hormones
The “Well Played” Award – Michael’s pretend amnesia when he wakes up from surgery

Best Quotes:
1. Narrator: “How does knowing the end affect the journey? Because some of you know how this is going to end.”
2. Jane: “So sorry to bug you but the doctor just gave us an update and I think I was in shock and I didn’t ask anything but now I’m prepared. So I was wondering if I could talk to a doctor, any doctor. It doesn’t even have to be one of your good ones.”
3. Michael: “Wait, who are you?... I’m just kidding.”

Lucifer - 2.04 - Lady Parts
BY Laura Markus

That was a fun episode! The case was very chaotic and kind of a mess, but everything else going on behind the scenes was great to watch. It dug deeper into pretty much all of the characters, which is always nice to see. Maze and Chloe were the standouts I think, and it was great to see the girls having fun and the boys getting into some trouble. And that nasty cliffhanger, well, they just can't give Chloe a break, can they? This season has been pretty darn enjoyable so far and this episode was another outing of that.

Grade: B-

Best Scene - Maze tells Chloe that they're moving in together.
Best Reason to Watch - The girls' and boys' nights.
Funniest Moment - Maze yelling, "No one calls my skank a skank!" about Ella.
The "Oh, Snap!" Award - Chloe gets into a car accident, and then fade to black.
Most Interesting Dynamic Moment - Lucifer pouring Maze a drink.
Worst Aspect - The case and everything surrounding it.
The "I Need More Details" Award - Whoever Maze was 'screwing' when she was on Facetime.

Weekly Shows

The Blacklist - 4.04 / 4.05 - Gaia / The Lindquist Concern

Overall episode 4 was better than some of the previous ones this season but it still falls off on its pacing, especially since the crime of the week plot wrapped up way too quickly in order to have all the characters emoangst about each other. That rushed the best part of the episode but dragged out the worst parts. I am so sick of the Kirk storyline that they cannot end it fast enough for me and we need to get Tom to his new show quickly. To be honest, I am also okay if Agnes stays missing because I'm not sure how a baby would work on this show and I really do not want Kirk to kill her, although that would make Tom and Liz splitting make more sense. Navabi and Aram were by far the worst thing about this episode though and usually I like them the best. I maintain that Navabi has every right to be ticked at Liz and to not trust anything she says. She does not have the right to take that out on her co-workers. Aram was outright spiteful to Navabi so time-out for him too. As always, the best subplot is Mr. Kaplan. Here's to getting some answers quickly.

Episode 5 was just a complete mess. I no longer care about most of the characters, the subplots drag on and on, and nothing ever gets accomplished at all. There is the DNA test confirming Kirk is Liz's father but given the track record of this show, who can even trust it? This show knows how to take a 2-episode plot and pour it into 15 freaking episodes. I don’t' care about Reddington or Kirk or their spat. I don't care about the soul-sucking love triangle with Aram and Navabi. At this point, the only main character I like is Ressler and all kudos to him for not letting Hitchins off the hook for being a cold-blooded killer. I will watch the next episode because NBC keeps telling me it is the episode I cannot miss but when that ends up being false advertising, this show drops back to marathon status for me until the winter break.

Grade: B- / C-

Best Reason to Watch - the case of the week
Best Scene - ecoterrorist dies / Ressler confronts Hitchins
Best Awww Moment - Ressler says he doesn't want Navabi to leave and if he can do something to change her mind, he will
Best Reaction - Reddington to Dembe calling his mole a freckle / Ressler to Cooper giving Hitchins the data
Best Real Life Quote - Tesla: "I don't care that they stole my idea. I care that they don't have any of their own."
Best Twist - the murderer is trying to upload all the inventions he stole to open source so everyone can start making them and improve everyone's life
Best Laugh - Reddington's reaction to Dembe giving Glen advice on how to bowl better
Worst Subplot - love triangle hell with Navabi, Aram, and Elise
Most Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs - the ecoterrorist
Most in Need of a Divorce - Tom and Liz
Most Angry - Liz at Tom for going after Kirk
Most Frustrating - Reddington, whom I'm about to start throwing socks at for being obnoxious
Biggest Dichotomy - the classical music playing in the background as the kids run for their life
Biggest Douche Moment - Aram and Navabi verbal spat
Biggest Question - Who is the guy who has Mr. Kaplan chained up and what does he want?
Weirdest Sight - Reddington in a bowling alley
The "Not You Again" Award - Laurel Hitchins is back and as dirty as ever
The "People Suck" Award - people are trying to make things better with their inventions but corporations prevent the inventions from coming out by either shelving the patents or killing the inventors in order to keep their profits
The "I'm with You" Award - Tom decides to track down Kirk instead of waiting like Liz asked
The "Voice of Evil" Award - Kirk's assistant keeps telling him to risk Agnes' life to save his own
Best Music - Different Drum by The Stone Poneys
The "Welcome Back" Award - Glen Carter
The "Welcome Back" Award (actor) - Matt Servitto from Harry's Law / Leon Rippy from Under the Dome and Leverage

Best Quotes -
1. Dembe: "It won't come." Red: "What?' Dembe: "Forgiveness for Kate, for what I did." Red: "You did nothing." Dembe: "Exactly."
2. Navabi: "It's this place. You never know where you stand with anyone, whether they'll be there for you when you need them." Ressler: "If there's anything I can do to get you to reconsider, you let me know. I'll do it. You're a good partner."
3. Ressler: "You know who she is and you're gonna give her that?" Hitchins: "Yes, Agent Ressler, he does but apparently you've forgotten. 'She' is your boss' boss' boss' boss." Ressler: "Well my boss' boss' boss' boss is a killer. See I know you murdered Reven Wright and one day, I'm gonna prove it."
4. Liz: "You don't have to apologize for trying to find our daughter."
5. Aram: "In Gaia's mind, he protected people." Ressler: "Yeah well, tell that to the parents who lost their kids." Cooper: "So he kills innocent people to make a point that innocent people are in danger."
6. Reddington: "Picasso said it took 4 years to paint like Raphael but a lifetime to paint like a child. They live in a delightful space somewhere between dreams and reality. They taste color, hear shapes, see sounds. We should all have such special needs."

Fresh Off the Boat - 3.02 - Breaking Chains

And she finally did it. Jessica has now reached the Beverly Goldberg standard of crazy. Many have tried but few make it. That was a world-class freak out over a gift. It reminds me of when Murray bought Beverly the microwave but with much more noble intentions from Louis. Usually Jessica is my favorite part of Fresh Off the Boat, but I had trouble relating to her this time because I would love to get a housekeeper. I did like how the episode gave her time to make her case however so we saw her viewpoint too. Plus it gave us another great Louis and Jessica scene. Still, it is the brothers who are the real treasures of this episode. It was a great change to see siblings trying to make the first day of school better for each other instead of bullying each other like most shows. Plus it showcased Emory's personality more than most episodes do. He gets neglected as the middle child much of the time. Evan standing up for Emory was a beautiful thing but it was actually Eddie that surprised me the most. Not only is he smart enough to play the system like he did, but he also gained some sympathy from me with his speech to Emory about his first day of school. I rarely remember how hard things can be for him because he hides it under layers of brattiness and goofiness. He is very right about schools not knowing much about other cultures in the 90's and how they tended to not want to rectify that. I don't buy his breaking chains theory about why he used his culture to get out of doing what he didn't want to do but he seems to believe it. That's what makes his gesture at the end to Emory more poignant.

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch - the brothers actually do try to make things easier for each other
Best Scene / Best Scolding - Evan tells Eddie off on behalf of Emory
Best Idea Even if Not Appreciated - Louis gets Jessica a housekeeper so she has more time
Best Canon - they kept true to Eddie's first day as far as I remember
Best Nostalgia - the Magnificent Seven of gymnastics
Worst Nostalgia - Cinemax
Biggest Change - the brothers here are much nicer than Barry and Erica were when Adam started high school on The Goldbergs
Biggest Laugh - Eddie's aging up of his crew in his fantasy world
Most Interesting Philosophy - Jessica roots for whichever team is likely to win in the Olympic sport
Most Crazy - It's a tossup between Evan and his refusal to let anyone sit next to him on the bus and Jessica wigging out over the cleaning lady and then taking her hostage in the car to get cleaning tips.
Truest Statement - Emory: "Eddie's kind of the problem."
The "Um, Okay…." Award - Evan puts up a shrine to Emory in his bus seat
The "He Has a Point" Award - I'm am definitely NOT Eddie's biggest fan but I did like his speech to Emory. He shouldn't be taking advantage of the system but he does have to face challenges that other kids don't. Sometimes I forget that and only see the brat.

Best Quotes -
1. Emory: "You signed me up for Karate Club." Eddie: "If you want to do karate, you should do karate." Emory: "And you're okay with that? I don't want to embarrass you." Eddie: "Who cares what I think? Who cares what anyone thinks? You do you, dawg. I'll just keep on putting those cracks in the jade ceiling."
2. Jessica: "Do you have experience with those? They are very delicate. They are arranged in a certain tableau. Each angle tells a different story." Mary: "Are they discussing the dust storm that just hit them?" Jessica: "They're covered in the fog of resiliency."
3. Evan: "Emory's not like you. He just wants to be himself and you're not letting him." Eddie: "Why? Because I'm blazing trails and breaking chains." Evan: "You're breaking your brother's spirit. He's just Emory. Stop making him feel bad for being who he is."
4. Jessica: "A family is supposed to do things for each other, not hire strangers to do them." Louis: "But we don’t like doing those things. At Cattlemen's, I hire people to do things I don't want to do." Jessica: "I don’t want to run our house like a business. No, I don't love cleaning up after everybody but they need me to. I like that they need me to. I don't want a stranger taking care of my family. I want to be the one taking care of them and then resenting them for not appreciating it."
5. Eddie: "So, you want to be what everyone thought I was when I walked in on the first day. You want to undo all the work I've done over the past two years." Emory: "You mean all the work you've done so you could just be lazy." Eddie: "They're ignorant about who we are and where we come from. Why shouldn't we take advantage of that? They see me coming down the hall, they're nervous. I'm keeping them on their toes, blazing trails, breaking chains. Then they see you coming in your gi with your violin and your camera, and we're back to where we started!"

How to Get Away with Murder - 3.05 - It's about Frank

The pacing was way off in this episode. There were filler scenes and some parts moved too slowly for me. However some of the most dragged out scenes also ended up being my favorite because it filled in the back story of both Frank and Annalise. That was particularly important when it came to Frank because he has always been the most mysterious character. It was interesting to see his vulnerability as a young man and to get some hints of the deep-rooted psychological issues that he has. Even more intriguing though was Sam. I cannot reconcile this Sam with the one who was verbally abusive and who ordered the death of a college student. As the prison scenes played out, Sam's words seemed so sincere and it was particularly touching when he told Frank that there was good in him. I can see no angle for Sam to be playing here so it makes me wonder if maybe Sam wasn't always the highly manipulative sociopath that the show wants me to believe he is. Perhaps he was more gray at a time too. Of course, I'm pretty sure he took emotional advantage of Bonnie, Annalise, and Lila so maybe not. I found a lot of Annalise's personal grooming and bender to be a drag on the episode but it's hard to fault the show for giving Viola Davis extended screen time when she always turns out such a layered performance. It was good to see Wes take care of her for a change though and I liked that he refused to leave. In fact, he and especially Michaela were both much improved in this one. If Michaela becomes more sassy like here and less whiny, she might rise in my character rankings. Shutting down Drake like that when she knew perfectly well that she took his laptop was a bold move and let's face it, someone needed to tell that douche to stuff it. He's actually more irritating than Asher and that's hard to do.

Grade: B-

Best Reason to Watch - back story
Best Character - This one was hard, mostly because there were several characters vying for and losing it within the span of the hour. However Michaela wins this week by the sheer fact that she surprised me, had me clapping, and made me laugh out loud. Now this is a Michaela I can get behind.
Best Character Interaction - Frank and Bonnie in the first part / Annalise and Sam in the second half
Best Smackdown - Michaela to Drake
Best Back Story - Frank
Best Cameo - Mary J. Blige
Best Reference - Dead Poets' Society
Worst Reference - Wizard of Oz
Worst Plan Ever - Bonnie has sex with Frank
Most Creepy - Annalise won't stop touching Wes' face
Most Fantastic Sass - Michaela
Biggest Surprise - Hargrove is at Annalise's AA meeting too
Biggest Ewww - close up of Annalise vomiting
The "There's No Cone of Silence" Award - now Connor is talking about how they all have murder in common while in the midst of other law students
The "Welcome Back" Award - Brett Butler from Grace Under Fire

Best Quotes -
1. Michaela (to Drake): "Go anywhere near my bag or anyone else's in this room and your laptop won't be all you're missing, you spineless, tiny-balled, whiny excuse of a man! Walk away."
2. Sam: "You were 13. You didn't know what you were doing." Frank: "I planned it for weeks, waited for the perfect moment. Looked forward to it and when it was over and he was under that car, screaming like an animal in a trap, my only thought was, 'You idiot, Frank. You couldn't even kill him right.' Now tell me I should get out of here." Sam: "You should." Frank: "Then you're even more of a sociopath than I am." Sam: "Sociopaths don't cry over what they did, Frank. Hey. You have good in you, okay? Just like all of us and I'm here to finally help you see that. You have good in you."
3. Annalise: "You sure you don't want the ashes? I mean we can cook them into slop, feed it to pigs, or just spread them in the worst place imaginable."
4. Wes: "Laurel needs to tell you something." Annalise: "She can't speak for herself? That's not the Laurel I know, letting a man speak for her."
5. Frank: "I've always been kind of a moron."

Lethal Weapon (1.02 -1.05)

Lethal Weapon is a fun popcorn show but it is also notable for its characters. I love the bromance between Murtaugh and Riggs but Trish and Murtaugh are fantastic as well. In fact, they are competing with Randall and Beth from This is Us for best new couple of the year. I haven't liked a couple more since White Collar's Peter and El. Usually, the action is also good with decent pacing in the middle. Basically, it is just an all-around fun show…until it isn't. That's usually the point where Riggs is having a breakdown or acting insane. I realize that his mental issues are a major part of the show but it also is starting to drag down the momentum. I'm not saying to cut those scenes out. They can't because they help the audience justify Riggs' actions. I do think they need to be better placed within the episode and better written, especially the parts that come off hokey instead of sincere. Insanity cannot be his only defining characteristic. Riggs needs to be more well-rounded than that so I wish they would play up his loyalty, humor, compassion, or anything else more. They also need to show that Riggs is making some progress at some time. It is a bit too mopey for about 1/3 of every episode and that's a lot of screen time devoted in what is basically a popcorn show. Cut back a bit on the brooding crazy and that leaves ample time to put some more fun, action, and bromance in its place.

Grade: B-

Best Reason to Watch - the bromance between Murtaugh and Riggs
Best Scene - Riggs and his father-in-law talk about him coming to dinner
Best Aww Moment - Murtaugh covers a sleeping Riggs with a towel
Best Reaction - the Murtaugh kids when their parents start talking about having handcuffs upstairs
Best Save - Riggs pushes Murtaugh out of the IED range
Best Punishment - Murtaugh and Riggs have to go to couples therapy
Best "Don't Even" Face - Trish Murtaugh, who can stop a lie in 2 seconds flat with it
Best Character Interaction - Murtaugh and Riggs of course
Best Back Story - the Murtaughs met when he pulled her over for speeding
Best Advice - Riggs tells RJ to tell his parents the truth
Best Reference - Miami Vice / Tango and Cash / Peaches and Cream / Starsky and Hutch / Cinderella / Scorsese / Airplane / Butch and Sundance
Worst Home Decorating - the decapitated heads of pot dealers
Worst Time to Chat with Your Wife - in the middle of a police chase with someone shooting at you.
Worst Trash Talk - Cruz, the guy who used to be in the gang task force
Biggest Surprise - no one can shoot, not the cops or the gangbangers
Biggest Overreaction - Murtaugh goes after Riggs because his son was stupid when really he should be blaming his son
Least Needed Subplot - the junior detectives fighting to get Daddy's (Murtaugh's) approval
Least Realistic - jumping from one building into the window of another / the armored car door just pops open and it doesn't have run-flat tires / falling out of a high rise and into a pool you can stand in would end in your death big time
Most Like Keystone Cops - trying to arrest the Gigantor in the shower
Most Romantic - Murtaugh pulls his wife over for speeding again in order to start date night
Most Sweetly Awkward - Murtaugh tries to read his love letter to Trish from his note cards, word for word
Most Long-Suffering - the police captain and it's only been 3 days
Most Likely to Die Trying to Prove Himself - Cruz
Dumbest Argument - the meaning of "there"
The "Welcome Back" Award - Kristoffer Polaha from Ringer and Backstrom / Ellen Hollman from Into the Badlands / Jordana Brewster from Secrets and Lies / Michael Raymond- James who played crazy on Game of Silence too

Best Quotes -
1. Bailey: "Look, I just got a call from Riggs and I don't know if he's kidding, but..." Avery: "What is it?" Bailey: "He's asking for backup." Avery: "Send everyone - SWAT, hostage negotiators, everyone!"
2. Roger: "I'll tell the waiter we're leaving." Trish: "Oh no, no. You're leaving. I have a bottle of wine and a babysitter." Roger: "I respect that."
3. Riggs: "Hey, what are you doing? Why didn't you take the shot?" Murtaugh: "Because he's driving a propane truck. I didn't want any collateral damage." Riggs: "And you want to be spicy salsa."
4. Trish: "Do you realize how many mistakes he made before lunch? Experience trumps youth every day of the week." Roger: "Tell that to my knees."
5. Trish: "Martin, no matter what I say to Roger, he's gonna follow you down any rabbit hole you go and that's okay. It's what he needs as a cop and probably as a man, but I can't imagine what I'd do if I lost him so I need you to promise me one thing. At the end of every shift, make sure he comes home to me." Riggs: "Yes, ma'am. I'll do the best I can." Trish: "From what I hear that ought to do."

MacGyver - 1.04 / 1.05 - Wire Cutter / Toothpick

Out of the 2 episodes, the first was definitely more my speed. It focused on humor and friendship along with action while the second had more romance in it. But in the end, as it does with most episodes of this show, it came down to which secondary, guest characters I liked better. You just can't get any better than two estranged KGB friends who squabble before healing a decades old rift. The Russians and Thornton were definitely the highlights for me. I also felt the first one had better pacing, while the second should have been more action but ended up dragging in some parts. I guess there just should have been more tension than I ended up feeling when killers are on a train so I ended up bored in some places.

Grade: B / C

Best Reason to Watch - Thornton is particularly impressive in these 2 episodes
Best Scene - the two Russians talk about the past
Best Aww Scene - Riley watches The Price is Right with Alexi
Best Character Interaction - the two old Russians
Best Product Placement - Uber, which has been all over TV this week
Best Music - Mother Russia by Iron Maiden
Best Save - skateboarding Alexi away from gunfire
Best Tag Team - Riley and Katarina take out the bad guy / Mac and Jack try to pull the train apart
Best Burn Notice Flashback - the rolled up cat magazine used to inflict bodily harm
Best Throwback - "Oh boy!"
Best Reference - Grand Theft Auto
Worst Rendition - Jack doing Push It
Worst Flashback - Hairspray in the eyes really does hurt. Anyone who walked down a high school hallway in the 80's can attest to that.
Worst Time for a Heart to Heart - while running for your life on a train full of people sent to kill you
Most Funny - the old Russian enforcer with all the guns that Jack keeps having to take away
Most Hands On - Thornton, who actually seems to spend more time out in the field than anyone else
Most Likely to Make Everyone Paranoid - Viktor
Most Interesting Improvised Tool - the Glock bullet wrench and lock pick
Biggest Surprise - it's the first time Y2K was ever good for anything except to sell paranoid people a bunch of junk they didn't need
Biggest Huh? - Why have they stranded the car with the witness on it in the middle of the tracks without a bodyguard when the killers have a helicopter to come pick her off?
Biggest Mystery - Who is Thornton's mom and how did she get a reputation for being a butt kicker?
The "Priorities, Priorities" Award - Jack, while you are busy telling the guy to get his pants, how about grabbing his shoes as well? If this train crashes, he might need them.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Elya Baskin from any show that needs a guest Russian character / Olek Krupa from The Americans

Best Quotes -
1. Alexi: "You really kept one? But the orders were to destroy them all." Viktor: "Sometimes orders are stupid." Alexi: "So you had your doubts too?" Viktor: "Of course I had doubts." Alexi: "Why didn't you tell me this before?' Viktor: "You gave me no warning. You defected without warning, left me behind."
2. Mac: "I actually think I might have a solution to this, but it's... it's kind of risky." Jack: "What kind of risky?" Mac: "The 'it might derail the whole thing instantly killing everyone on board' kind." Jack: "Okay, good. We'll call that Plan A and not do that. What's Plan B?"
3. Riley: "Apparently 2 grumpy old Russians aren't enough. We also need a grumpy old computer."
4. Viktor: "I killed 27 people to keep that secret and now is on World Wide Web for whole world to see." Alexi: "Even secrets get old, Viktor."
5. Jack: "Well you'll be happy to know that Thornton and I have talked about getting you some more field training, but don't worry. Once we're done with you, you'll make Jason Bourne look like Matt Damon."
6. Jack: "Unless this plan ends with me eating a thousand pancakes, I don't like it."

Supernatural - 12.01/12.02 - Keep Calm and Carry On / Mamma Mia

When it comes to Supernatural these days, I both look forward to and dread the season premieres. For years it was the most exciting day of the TV year for me. Everything changed in season 8 when Jeremy Carver, whom I looked forward to having as show runner, destroyed the brother relationship in one fell swoop. So with our new fearless leader, Andrew Dabb, I approached this season premiere with extreme caution. Ends up, I need not have been nervous. While Supernatural will never relive its glory days of the first 3 seasons, the first two episodes of season 12 were solid. I loved Mary and so far her return has been a boon instead of a curse. That might change if she becomes a plot device to destroy the brother bond later, but for now she is an amazing asset. I liked how she not only can kick butt when needed but they humanized her as well. She is having trouble adjusting, not just to the new technology but also to her grown sons, whom she remembers as babies. Azazel took so much away from her family and her. Plus she has the added guilt of knowing that she was the catalyst for it all. Watching her catch up will be both touching and heartbreaking I suspect. I've never watched a show that got 12 seasons before but resurrecting Mary is a great way to make the story seem fresh again. The subplots though dragged down the pacing. To be honest, Lucifer, Cas, and Crowley's storylines closed in season 5. While I love Crowley (partly for the actor if I'm being honest), I can admit that this Lucifer plot feels a lot like dragging something out just to keep him on. It's like every time they put angels on the screen to justify keeping Cas. It's time to let all these sideshows go and concentrate on the Winchester family reunion. And no, that does not include having Castiel tag along.

Grade: B+

Best Reason to Watch - inserting Mary into the Winchester world
Best Scene - Mary and Sam talk at the end when he brings her John's journal and they hug
Best Awww Moment - Mary calls the Impala sweetheart just like Dean does
Best Action - Mama Winchester vs. Lady Bevell
Best Surprise - Vince has a back story that is very similar to Nick's before both become Lucifer's vessel
Best Back Story - how John and Mary met
Best Canon - Mary did start this whole thing and I'm glad they didn't forget that even if I am not happy that it is canon to begin with
Best Friend - Tommy, who tries to get Vince to move on from his dead lover
Best One-Shot Character - the demon who used to be a teenage girl cracked me up
Best Plan - Sam pretends to commit suicide so he can try to escape
Best Villain - Bevell, because she's someone I can hate but still respect as a villain because she's smart and snarky
Best Advice to the Writers - Cas: "Don't make things needlessly complicated…"
Best Flashback to Better Years - Dean and Mary talking about how her ghost saved them in Home
Worst Recap - Amara and God, which would be a storyline best memory wiped
Worst Torture - making any Winchester relive their past because their dark spots are really dark to paraphrase Sam in Nightmares
Most Interesting Casting - Rick Springfield as Lucifer
Most Likely to Become the Theme - good vs. evil monsters given that the British kill all monsters regardless of whether they are likely to cause problems or not, while the Winchesters tend to wait and see
Most Overused - torturing Sam is beyond a little old now / Spice Girl references are thrown out a lot here
Most Worthless - the British segment of the Men of Letters during the first apocalypse storyline
Biggest Change - Lucifer is less honest with Vince than he was with Nick and Sam
Biggest Shout Out - they are going back to my home state of Missouri
Biggest Mystery - Why is Rowena still on this show? I like the actress and sometimes the character, but her story ended awhile ago.
The "This Just Got Awkward" Award - Mary doesn't say any words and still implies that Dean was conceived in the backseat of the Impala
The "Still Miss You" Award - Benny
The "Welcome to the Modern Century" Award - Why is Rowena lying about being a star in the Royal Ballet if all it takes is a quick Google search to see she's lying?
The "I Don't Think So" Award - Mary is in the backseat while Cas is in the front? Nope, you don't do that to your mama.
The "Aww, Poor Baby" Award - Mary, who keeps looking at her hands after she kills British Xena to save Dean / Baby gets nailed again
The "Welcome Back" Award (object) - green jacket / John's journal
The "Welcome Back" Award (character) - Mary Winchester
The "Welcome Back" Award (actor) - Elizabeth Blackmore from Legends of the Seeker

Best Quotes -
1. Mary: "I just have so much about you boys to catch up on. Mother stuff, you know - first tooth, first crush." Sam: "Yeah." Mary: "I just have a lot of blanks to fill in." Sam: "Right, uh...Dad's journal. His writing, his words helped me fill in some blanks and answer some questions I didn't know I had and you know, it… keeps him with us sort of." Mary: "Thank you." Sam: "Good night." Mary: "Dean said you got out of hunting." Sam: "Yeah." Mary: "And yet here you are." Sam: "Well this is my family. My family hunts, you know? It's what we do. Mom, for me, just…um, having you here fills in the biggest blank."
2. Dean: "Listen, b**. I don't care who you are. I don't care what you want. You have my brother." Bevell: "Dean Winchester? I heard you were dead." Dean: "Well you heard wrong. Now I'm gonna give you one chance - just one - to hand Sam back." Bevell: "Sorry, not possible." Dean: "Oh, you think you can run from me? Try it. Because when I find you, and I will find you, if he is not in one piece, I will take you apart. Do you understand me?"
3. Crowley: "What's the bloody hold up? He's the one and only Satan in the phonebook." Rowena: "It's witchcraft, not Google Maps."
4. Sam: "You want to get mad? You want to get mean? I've been tortured by the devil himself so you, you're just an accent in a pantsuit. What can you do to me?"
5. Dean: “You okay?” Mary: “No. I'm sorry I just...I spent my life running from this, from hunting and I got out. I never wanted this for you and Sam.” Dean: “Mom, I get it. I do. If I had kids I wouldn't want them in this, but Sam and me - saving people and hunting things - this is our life. I think we make the world a better place. I know that we do.”
6. Dean: "She was using a Chinese mind control technique. Hard to do when you're unconscious. Turns out this ape did read a book or two."

Younger - 3.04 - A Night at the Opera

This episode flew by but it also felt like nothing much happened. I would have liked to spend a little more time with Liza and Josh at the opera, maybe even seeing their reactions to the show instead of a toss off remark from Josh at the end. It would have been interesting to see his take as a musician as well. I guess I was hoping for something less stereotypical and less love triangle. The YouTube culture could have been illuminating too but instead it was just a farce about the worst of social media. I know it is supposed to show the difference between old media and new media again but in this case, new media was especially pungent and repulsive. Time to try a little subtlety and maybe make these characters a little less defined by their generation. It's the third season so the same tired theme is getting a little old and a lot stereotypical.

Grade: C

Best Reason to Watch - Taylor
Best Twist - one of the Stoopid Girls is actually very smart
Worst Puns - Diana's sexy talk with the plumber
Worst Product Placement - the YouTube conventions actually look less fun after watching this episode than they sounded before it
Most Destructive - Diana, who breaks the pipes in order to get the plumber back to her building
Most Annoying - the Stoopid Girls
Least Flexible Neighbor - Diana, who makes them stop construction even though she is already up and almost ready to go
Least Grumpy - Diana after banging the plumber
Biggest Douche - Bryce, who is getting less interesting and more irritating
The "I'm with You" Award - I agree with Liza. Period sex is messy and less fun.
The "Over Your Dead Body" Award - There is zero way that Bryce is going to fire Diana. Zero. She'll have his corpse buried in a fashionable spot in the woods and never seen again before that happens.

Best Quotes -
1. Taylor: "My manager says that dense historical fiction isn't trending so for now I'm stuck acting like a drunk child while I pay off the rest of my student debt."
2. Josh: "Did they all go to the same plastic surgeon? Because they all look exactly the same." Liza: "Inbreeding. The 1% likes to keep the bloodlines closed."
3. Liza (about the Stoopid Girls): "They're gonna save the publishing industry?"
4. Maggie: "Now come on. It's our heavy flow day. I want to get home before I get mauled by a bear."
5. Josh: "Babe, am I underdressed? People are wearing capes." Liza: "That's cause she's a vampire."

Dropped Shows

I didn't get a chance to watch everything I wanted to this week and that means more things need to be dropped. Luckily both Speechless and Frequency annoyed me so much that they will open up some much needed space on my weekly viewing list.

As for Speechless, I cannot take Maya for another second. I like Minnie Driver but this character drives me insane. She is so focused on one child that she is completely out of touch with everyone else's needs. She is way too demanding at school and as a teacher, I resent the way she speaks to the people there. She's willing to make everyone else's life miserable for her son, but she's not willing to pitch in and help make the needed changes. Instead of railing at everyone, maybe she could have come up with the alternative party and not be a complete witch. Also, she is mentally damaging her other kids. The fact that they feel guilty about having fun when their brother isn't there is not only unfair to them but likely to make them harbor long-lasting resentment of their brother. That's not funny. That's emotional abuse. I have no desire to ever see another episode of this show again.

Frequency is the biggest disappointment of the week. What ended up being my favorite pilot of the fall season turned quickly into an emoangsty mess with the biggest douche character of the week. Raimy is equally as obnoxious as Maya and by far the biggest hypocrite. I know I should feel sympathy for her and on paper, I do. However she spends 2 whole episodes railing at people who do not deserve it. Even more frustrating is how she treats her dad. She's constantly yelling at him about things and then not doing them herself. The final straw was when she blamed her dad for not stopping her when she almost killed a man. He wasn't even in the same decade. Are you kidding me? I know she's under pressure and I know things are spinning out of control for her, but she needs to stop whining and bratting out. She's too old for that. At this point, I want her to give the ham radio over to Rayna and let him work with her father. He'd do a much better job of it. As it is, I have not given up hope on this show. I think it could right itself and become fantastic. I just don't have that kind of time right now. It's dropped to marathon later status.

Speechless Grade: D for dropped completely
Frequency Grade: D, but on hold to marathon later

Soon to be Dropped - American Housewife, The Blacklist, No Tomorrow, and Scorpion
Priority Shows Next Week - pilots, This is Us, Designated Survivor, Timeless, Scorpion, Eyewitness

About the Author - Dahne
One part teacher librarian - one part avid TV fan, Dahne is a contributing writer for SpoilerTV, where she recaps, reviews, and/or creates polls for Teen Wolf, The 100, Grimm, How to Get Away with Murder, The Librarians, and others. She also runs the annual Character Cup. She's addicted to Twitter, live tweets a multitude of shows each week, and co-hosts The 100 "Red-Shirted" and Teen Wolf "Welcome to Beacon Hills" podcasts for Southgate Media Group. Currently she writes a Last Week in TV column for her blog and SpoilerTV. ~ "I speak TV."
Recent Reviews (All Reviews)

Sunday, October 23, 2016

How to Get Away with Murder - 3.05 - It's about Frank - Best Scene Poll

About the Author - Dahne
One part teacher librarian - one part avid TV fan, Dahne is a contributing writer for SpoilerTV, where she recaps, reviews, and/or creates polls for Teen Wolf, The 100, Grimm, How to Get Away with Murder, The Librarians, and others. She also runs the annual Character Cup. She's addicted to Twitter, live tweets a multitude of shows each week, and co-hosts The 100 "Red-Shirted" and Teen Wolf "Welcome to Beacon Hills" podcasts for Southgate Media Group. Currently she writes a Last Week in TV column for her blog and SpoilerTV. ~ "I speak TV."
Recent Reviews (All Reviews)

Monday, October 17, 2016

Last Week in TV - Week of Oct. 9 - Reviews and Episode Awards

Hello and welcome back to Last Week in TV. In an effort to get the column back on a regular schedule, this edition is going to be a little short. I'm caught up on The Blacklist and Lethal Weapon but I didn't have time to transcribe my notes. Let's just say that I am happier with Lethal Weapon than The Blacklist. I'll cover both of them next week, along with Speechless, Designated Survivor, Frequency, MacGyver, Pitch, and Supernatural. I'm partway through my Pitch marathon but shockingly, I didn't have time to watch the Supernatural premiere yet. Here's hoping Mama Winchester isn't causing too much trouble. Next week, work is a bit easier so I'm crossing fingers that I can get caught up. How was your TV week? Anything really stick out to you? I'm really excited about next week's nominated episode because my dad has been raving about his Prison Break marathon. Since I haven't seen anything but bits and pieces, I'll finally be able to discuss the show with him. Well, the pilot at least. If you have an episode to nominate, please fill out the short 2-question form below. Until next time, happy TV viewing.

Episode of the Week

This is Us - 1.03 - Kyle

Again, This is Us delivers a strong, heartwarming, character-driven episode that had me caring about each one of these characters. That is nearly impossible to do. I even care about Kevin, who is often self-centered and narcissistic. I thought this was going to be the episode when I did not feel for him but in the end, he pulled through with his speech, firing Kate. It has to be the sweetest firing ever. Randall continues to be amazing as well, but so is Beth, who is the most perceptive wife on the planet. She has his back every step of the way, even when it is Randall who needs the push. Still, this was Mandy Moore's episode. She shines as an overwhelmed mother dealing with the grief of losing a child while still having to take care of three more. It's a nuanced performance that shows just how far she has come as an actress. I especially like her gumption in finding William and how through that we get to know William and his story better. I wondered why Randall didn't have a name that started with a "K" so I am glad that they addressed it. Plus, it just fits that Randall was given a name tied to William. I certainly hope that he never realizes that his mom and William have met before because I don't want to see that bond break or his trust shatter. The reason this show works so well is that it is melodramatic for sure but it doesn't falter into emoangsting or sappiness . It's a balance that tugs at my heartstrings but keeps me from rolling my eyes, and I can't wait to see more of these characters.

Grade: A-

Best Reason to Watch - all the amazing heart they put into these characters
Best Awww Moment - Kevin fires Kate
Best Detective - Rebecca when she tracks down William via the bus
Best Way to Show the Past - William goes from a healthy young poet to an addict that can't take care of his son through a series of vignettes of him on the bus
Best Confidence Builder - Toby bringing Kate to the nursing home to sing
Best Reference - Cyndi Lauper
Best Back Story - how Randall got his name
Best Speech - Dr. K to Jack
Worst Plan - stopping by to see your kids unannounced
Most Talented - Kate's singing
Most Presumptuous - Kevin thinks Kate is going to move to New York with him
Least Romantic - making out in the janitorial closet
Biggest Turn Around - Toby immediately accepts Kate's apology when she whips out a condom
Biggest Twist - Rebecca already knew William and made a deal with him
Smartest Woman in the Room - Beth, who gets Randall so much and gives great advice to him
Strangest Address - Randall calls his mom 'Mommy' when he's about to tell her about William
Best Music - Never Been to Me, which I loved as a kid / Blues Run the Game by Jackson C. Frank
The "Welcome Back" Award - Doctor Katowsky, who was one of the best parts of the pilot

Best Quotes -
1. Rebecca: "If you hurt him…" William" I won't." Rebecca: "Fine then. But know this, my son, who I raised, is gonna put everything he has into trying to save you because that's who he is. It's gonna come in front of his job, in front of his marriage, and in front of his time with his kids so you better damn well be worth that."
2. Toby: "Alright, I booked you in their prime slot - 3:oo pm. It's right after Jell-O but before their nap. Perfect place to break your seal, right? Now remember, most of them will probably be asleep, the rest won't remember this tomorrow, and most of them lived through World War 2 so no matter how bad you are, they've seen worse."
3. Randall: "Hey babe, have you seen my keys?" Beth: "I think you left them in the plan you never made."
4. Jack: "What if she doesn't find her way?" Dr. K: "She will." Jack: "How do you know?" Dr. K: "For the same reason that I know you're gonna give her the space to find it…cause I believe in good people. Of course, I voted for Nixon so you've got to take everything I say with a grain of salt."
5. Randall: "Look this doctor.." William: "Isn't gonna tell me anything I don't already know." Randall: "But he might." William: "But he won't." Randall: "But he might and something tells me he might be a little more thorough than the doctor at whatever free homeless clinic you've been going to to get your free medical counsel at. To say nothing of the fact that I had to kiss up to the biggest d-bag at my firm just to get you this appointment. So yes William, you are getting in the car right now and we are going to this doctor's appointment, and then and only then will I give you permission to hobble off like Hobo Joe without saying so much as goodbye." William: "Starting to not feel so bad about leaving you at that fire station."

Nominated Episode

Brooklyn 9 - 1.01/1.02 - Pilot / The Tagger

This comedy is not for me. It's not a bad comedy but to find these two episodes funny, you have to see the humor in incompetence and overgrown man children. I find neither funny. My biggest problem is Andy Samberg, who admittedly always rubs me the wrong way. I have yet to find him funny and his aggressive insubordination and childish behavior here make me wish for his downfall, even if he is one of the few competent detectives in the precinct. Still I loved Jake standing up the police commissioner, whose bratty son is a direct result of the commissioner's bad parenting. I think enjoyment of Brooklyn 99 begins and ends on whether you find Jake Peralta charming or annoying. For me, it's annoyance. I do, however, like Andre Braugher as an actor so when I originally checked out this pilot, it was for him. While he plays the comedic straight man well, his character was also too brusque and unbending for me too. Good leadership requires some give and take, which is missing in this character. If I didn't dislike Jake so much, I would be on the side of anyone taking down the micro-managing new boss. While most of the characters bugged me, I did really enjoy Rosa and Terry. Rosa because she's her own unique person, who doesn't take anything from anyone but is also competent and interesting. Terry because he defies stereotypes and provided some of the more funny moments. As far as the cases go, I found them to be interesting if a bit rushed. However, that falls more on the format of the sitcom than it does on the show or its writers. The cases are not meant to be the focus. In the end, I think that Brooklyn 99 would appeal to many people, especially those who like workplace comedies that lean towards the farce category. As for me, I prefer Angie Tribeca for my over-the-top cops.

Grade: C
Ranking: 1+
Audience - people who find the characters funny instead of irksome, which should be a lot of people

Best Reason to Watch - Rosa
Best Scene - Jake arrests the commissioner's bratty son
Best Character - Rosa Diaz
Best Compliment - Rosa tells Boyle that she likes his company because he's sweet
Best Reference - Highlander
Best Names - Jeffords named his twin girls Cagney and Lacey
Best Revenge - Holt brings everyone in to see Jake in his underwear when he tries to be a joker
Worst Parent - Deputy Commissioner
Biggest Opportunist - Santiago, who makes herself look good in front of the deputy commissioner while he's upset with Jake
Biggest Say What? - Unless that ham is lined with gold flakes, why would anyone spend $6,000 on a ham?
Most Annoying by a Country Mile - Jake Peralta
Most Worthless / Second Most Annoying - Gina
Most Uptight and Somewhat Unreasonable - Holt
Least Helpful - the custodian who refuses to move for the cops
The "I'm with You" award - I think Citizen Kane is highly overrated too, Rosa.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Andre Braugher from Homicide: Life on the Street / Terry Crews from Everybody Hates Chris

Best Quotes -
1. Gina: "She's got a type, which is really anyone but you." Boyle: "Yeah, that was my ex-wife's type too."
2. Peralta: "We? You're coming with me? Sir, with all due respect, I don't need backup." Holt: "It's not backup. It's babysitting."
3. Jeffords: "Jake Peralta is my best detective. He likes putting away bad guys and he loves solving puzzles. The only puzzle he hasn't solved is how to grow up."
4. Santiago: "I'd like a list of your employees, whoever had access to the store. I'd also like to apologize for my partner. His parents didn't give him enough attention."
5. Rosa: "You know what they don't teach you at the academy. It's better to be a criminal."

Guest Reviews

Agents of SHIELD - 4.03 - Uprising
BY Swanpride

I guess after classics like "It's a magical place," "Happy to comply," and "Discovery requires experimentation", the tagline of this season is "A team divided is a team defeated." And I can't express enough how happy I am about it. I was kind of afraid that the show would be so distracted with finding ways to tie in the mystical side of the MCU that it would overlook the greater theme of Phase 3, which is, after all, the fallout of Civil War. With its Inhumans, Agents of SHIELD is the show most primed to address and discuss such issues, and this episode brought up a slew of points. Mainly it showed why putting people on lists can have terrible consequences, especially if said list ends up in the wrong hands. But there is also some really settled parallel storytelling going on there, for example when the question is asked "How do you cure fear?". While the line refers to May, it also ties into the bigger illness which ails the world, with humans being afraid of powered people, and powered people having to go into hiding. Thus said, the whole storyline with crazy May feels like a pointless detour at this point, unless there will be consequences later on. Especially since the power going on in the crucial power was the most predictable thing which happened in an episode which was not that difficult to predict otherwise already.

Grade: B+

Best Reason to Watch - Choose a side!!!
Best Scene - SHIELD being officially back! I was kind of teary eyed.
Best Character - Fitz, who is sciencing the sh... out of needles and bowls of water.
Best Fight - Team Coulson taking out the watchdogs
Best Team-up - Mack, Coulson and Fitz for the win!
Best Effects - The way they showed off Elena's power was easily the highlight
Most Iffy Science - Shouldn't an EMP fry the electronics for good? But I guess this one was designed to not do permanent damage but to just suppress them for a while? Even Mack says that there is something not right about this.
Worst Friend - Honestly, even before she rejected Elena, Maria really annoyed me with her self-absorbed attitude. With those friends, you really don't need any enemies.
Most Missed - Joey. I hope he is okay and not on the casualty list.
Most Pleasant Surprise - Elena getting her own storyline this time around. I hope she'll become a regular or at least a regular guest.
Most Random Observation - It was treated nearly as a side-note, but it is chilling that 17 peaceful Inhumans were hunted down and killed during the blackout. Well, or at least 17 people the watchdogs thought were Inhumans. In any case, it is such a useless loss of life and that is not even counting all the people who get hurt during the riots.
Prediction of the Week - I wonder if using Aida's energy source to cure May will somehow have a negative effect on Aida.

Best Quote:
1. Coulson: "Does the backseat science department care to weigh in on this?" Fitz: "She is at a bachelorette party. She's probably having a good time dancing and drinking with a lot of sexy Latino guys." Mack: "I am not taking that beat."
2. Fitz: "Yeah, no big deal, just rudimentary science, maybe saving the day."
3. Jemma: "Hell no, I am not ready! We are about to kill May!"

Criminal Minds – 12.03 – Taboo
BY Emma

Everything is right in my world again. Emily Prentiss is back and she’s staying. She doesn’t exactly get off on the right foot with Luke but during a stakeout they seem to find some common ground. Speaking of Luke, I knew Roxy was a dog, and a beautiful one she is! I couldn’t find anything online about the pup (please share links in the comments if you’ve seen anything) but she looks like a purebred Belgian Malinois – which would make sense given Luke’s military background. I love how Luke dotes on her but I’m sure my Veterinary Nutrition professor would be pitching a fit about her diet. This was the first episode without Hotch and his absence was explained by having “temporary duty” elsewhere. I hope he is permanently written off by deciding to make the temporary duty permanent to spend more time with Jack instead of him being killed while on this temporary duty. Hopefully, we find out in the next couple episodes and this isn’t dragged out until midseason. Paget has taken his place in the credits and the line-up and if we hadn’t already gotten casting news for the new unit chief, I would’ve assumed she was taking the job. As for the case – pretty straight forward. I saw the twist coming from a mile away and there was no obvious tie in to the escaped serial killer.

Grade: B+ (B without Emily’s return)

Best Reason to Watch – Emily is back!
Best Scene – Luke’s morning routine that appears to revolve mostly around his dog
Best Character Interactions – Emily and Luke
Best Addition – Luke’s dog, Roxy. She needs to start traveling with the team
Biggest “Oops” – Emily profiling Luke whilst he stands behind her
Worst Place for a Romantic Evening – illegal dump site also used by a serial killer to dump bodies
Worst Way to Find Out Who Your Birth Mom Is – when she rejects your sexual advances
Best Mystery – why Luke wants to keep his Ranger unit info quiet
The “Welcome Back” Award – my dearest, loveliest Emily Prentiss (Paget Brewster)

Best Quotes:
1. Emily: “If I never do another stakeout again, it’ll be too soon.” Luke: “Like ‘em that much, huh?” Emily: “Let me count the ways; the a** numbing boredom, the greasy fast food, the cold coffee and may I tell you how much I hate peeing in the woods?”
2. Luke: “Can you send us his home and work addresses?” Garcia: “Ugh, noobie. Already sent.”
3. Luke (voiceover): “Three things cannot long stay hidden; the sun, the moon and the truth. Buddha”

Modern Family - 8.04 - Weathering Heights
BY Laura Markus

This episode surprised me in a few different ways. Phil's story with Rainer Shine was a bit cliché, however it did remind us that Phil Dunphy is no straight guy. I found great enjoyment from that, at least. The show continues to hammer home that Alex is nothing without her intelligence, which bothers me to no end. Really hope one day they'll put a stop to that. Mitch and Cam, once again taking in Dwight, dealt with very appropriate backlash from Lily. They were completely ignoring her, and sure, it was played for laughs like everything else, but this was pretty serious. They embrace at the end with a hilarious tea party scene. Joe had to go to speech therapy, and as someone who actually went through speech therapy, this was an interesting approach. Of course it turned out that Gloria was some of the problem. And lastly, Manny was trying to film his video for application to Juilliard. There wasn't a lot of great substance for this, that was until the end. That last scene with Manny on voiceover with pictures of his childhood, talking about how he is the son of an immigrant, but his businessman father also took him in, was beautiful. It's scenes like this where Modern Family is best. I hope they remember this, because that was refreshing to see.

Grade: B

Best Scene - Manny's final video for Juilliard.
Best Reason to Watch - Also Manny's video. Even if it was short, it was so sweet.
The Welcome Back Award - Nathan Fillion.
Funniest Moment - The tea party / Dwight carrying Mitch to avoid getting his new shoes dirty.
Best Accidental Reference - Cam hired a "Hot Cop". I remember those from _Arrested Development_.
Worst Aspect - Claire and Luke cheating at Scrabble to make Alex think she got dumber from her Mono.

New Shows

American Housewife - 1.01 - Pilot

Two words - grow up. Or maybe 3 - get over it. I won't lie. This pilot was rough. Most of it wasn't funny and sassy comes off as whiny and neurotic when it's paired with low self-esteem and a general feeling that everyone in your neighborhood is working against you. No wonder the kids are a mess. Well, at least 2 of them. I'm not sure what Taylor's issues are going to be. Maybe a bulimia very special episode in the future? To be fair, Greg has his own mental health issues with his germophobia. Not that I can't relate. The whole household just comes off more sad than funny. I'm not sure this is what the people campaigning for more neural atypical diversity in TV were looking for. Not everything is bad though. I think that Mixon has the chops to be a good leading lady, once she gets better and less repetitive material to work with. Plus Bader has already proven his comedy chops and it is great to see him as the most normal one in the mix, if a little weird. In the end, this could be a modern times The Goldbergs if they tighten up the story and make Katie come off as less paranoid and less self-destructive. Running off potential new neighbors is taking things way too far.

Grade: D
Rating: 2
Audience - those who are patient TV viewers and wish the Drew Carey Show were told from a female point of view and took place in the Hamptons instead of Cleveland

Best Reason to Watch - the fish out of water making no attempts to fit in story has potential even if it doesn't live up it
Best Scene - Greg reassures Anna Kat that she will make friends later
Best Advice - "Friends are more important than germs."
Most in Need of Therapy - Katie, by a long shot, and Anna Kat is OCD
Most in Need of Being Dropped - the voiceovers
Most Annoying Kid - Oliver, the unfunny Alex P. Keaton, so far but I'm guessing Anna Kat will top him soon
Most Shameless Product Placement - FitBit
Phrase Most Needing to Go - any variation of the word fat, which is said about every 3.6 seconds
Least Timely Joke (By 2 Decades) - Katie: "It was right in front of me the whole time. If it was OJ, it would have murdered me in front of my own dog."
Biggest Laugh - when Take My Breath Away comes on
Biggest Insult - apparently "being real"
Biggest Double Take - I originally thought Taylor here was Dana from The Goldbergs. And I thought Teen Wolf was bad with actors that look alike.
The "I Don't Get It Either" Award - Why DOES someone need 2 Fitbits?
The "Welcome Back" Award - Diedrich Bader from The Drew Carey Show and apparently every show, movie, and animated anything that has ever needed voice work / Katy Mixon from Mike and Molly

Best Quotes -
1. Katie: "My fulltime job is to make sure that 2 of my kids fit in less and one fits in more."
2. Oliver: "Mom, I've thought about it and I refuse to participate in the school food drive on principle." Katie: "And what principle is that?" Oliver: "Westport homeless people have better stuff than we do. Nude Norman rides a bike that's worth more than our car."
3. Katie: "I'm straight up mentally healthy in the germ department."
4. Greg: "So you're acting crazy…"
5. Anna Kat: "Would now be a good time to ask for a pet owl?" Greg: "I don't know if there's ever a good time for that."

Weekly Shows

TBBT - 10.03 / 10.04 - The Dependence Transcendence / The Cohabitations Experimentation

These were fairly typical episodes of The Big Bang Theory. Each had a scene or two that raised their grades but a lot of it was ultimately forgettable. In the first one, I loved how panicked they were at not being able to meet their military deadline and then how quickly the Colonel shrugs it off. Talk about panicking for nothing. The best scene though was definitely Raj's dad comforting Bernadette when she's not excited about having the baby. I tend to like both Raj and Bernadette better when they are together…or at least when Bernadette isn't being a complete harpy to Raj. Seriously, tone her down please. She used to be so nice. In the second episode, I like the setup to Sheldon and Amy moving in and how Amy isn't going to always take Sheldon's attitude. It ought to be interesting to see if Sheldon can indeed compromise. While I didn't understand any part of their science fight, it too made me laugh. I'm with Penny here. I also like how this gives Penny and Leonard time to be a couple too. It's about time.

Grade: B-

Best Reason to Watch - the touching moments
Best Scene - Raj's dad comforts Bernadette
Best Product Placement - Pringles
Best Pun - Penny's granite joke
Best Revenge - Amy uses flash photography on Sheldon after he knocks her out of bed
Worst Babysitter - apparently Bernadette
Worst End Card - Lorre is pouting about people saying TBBT uses a laugh track instead of a studio audience. The effect is the same. It still sounds like a laugh track, it still works like a laugh track, and it's still as distracting and annoying as a laugh track. This isn't the 70's. Time to stop telling viewers when they are supposed to think something is funny. I promise I can figure it out on my own.
Weirdest and Worst Hallucination - Fake Flash peer pressures Sheldon into having an energy drink like it was a drug
Most Impressive - Leonard's Dance, Dance Revolution moves and Penny's ability not to laugh
Most Spastic - Sheldon on energy drinks
Most Confusing - Sheldon and Amy's fight leaves me feeling like Penny to be honest
Biggest Laugh - Sheldon loopy on energy drinks / Leonard and Penny dancing in their underwear
Biggest Break Through - Sheldon admits that he can't figure out the math for the project
Strangest Reference - Sound of Music
Person Who Knows Sheldon Best - Leonard because he convinces Sheldon to stay with Amy via Star Trek while Amy tries to use science
The "About Time" Award - Penny and Leonard are going to live with each other without Sheldon for 5 weeks
The "Welcome Back" Award - Bert, the geologist / Raj's dad / Colonel Williams

Best Quotes -
1. Raj's Dad: "Look, some people are baby people and some people are not baby people. It doesn't mean you won't love your own baby." Bernadette: "But I thought I's be more excited." Raj's Dad: "Oh being excited isn't a guarantee of anything. Rajesh's mother was thrilled when she was pregnant with him. After he was born, she doted on his every move, and you know what happened? He broke her heart, moved halfway around the world, and dates only poor white women. So you never know." Bernadette: Thank you. I feel better now." Raj: "I don't."
2. Colonel: "You think you're the first government contractor who isn’t gonna deliver on time? We're still waiting for a big space laser Reagan order to beat the Commies."
3. Sheldon: "I accept this 5-week mission to share a living space with my girlfriend." Amy: "Oh, this is so exciting." Sheldon: "Well now, don't be surprised if like Star Trek, it's canceled in three."
4. Sheldon: "Ah then again, what are the odds of someone attacking me?" Amy: "Rising rapidly."
5. Amy: "What?" Penny: "You tell me about your foot fungus, but this is a secret?" Amy: "I'm sure it's just because I'm dating Sheldon." Bert: "Actually I think Sheldon's popular because he's dating you." Penny: "Now Sheldon's popular? What is happening?"

Bull - 1.03 - Unambiguous

This is my favorite episode of Bull so far. First, the client was super sympathetic, making it the best case they've had yet. It's hard to not feel for her and her plight. It's also hard not to cheer for her when she gets up the confidence to defend herself against the prosecutor. Plus, there was no doubt about her innocence even from the beginning because Bull had no doubts. This show will get really interesting if he's ever wrong about a current client but I don't see that happening. The second reason why I liked this better is because I liked Bull better. Getting a tiny glimpse into his past helps me understand him and I think his abusive childhood is an angle they need to explore more to make Bull more accessible. I didn't find Bull to be obnoxious or douchey at all in this one. Instead, he was extremely helpful, especially during Reese's panic attacks. This gives me hope that the show might stick around longer than I expected on my TV schedule. Other positives include getting more of Benny's background, even if they need to share that love with the female characters. Currently Benny is my favorite character by sheer fact of his integrity, which also makes him a character that I root for. I love how his confidence at the end of last episode carries over here, even when he's going against someone he really cared about. Then there's the rest of the team and how everyone respects each other for what they bring to the group. It's here where Bull really shines because he gets the best out of each member without bullying them. Instead he encourages and nurtures their self-confidence so they can do their best. All in all, this show is growing on me.

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch - the teamwork, which may end up setting this procedural apart from others
Best Scene / Best Speech - the rape victim stands up for herself after the prosecutor bullies her
Best Plan - go after the podcaster, who turned their client into a pariah
Best Distraction - Chunk choreographs a spontaneous dance to keep reporters away from their client
Best Reference - Jerry Maguire
Best Slogan - Cable's t-shirt says, "Say no to drugs and yes to pizza."
Best Back Story - still Benny
Most Needed - background on some of the females
Most Interesting Solution That May or May Not Be True - you can stop a panic attack by repeating numbers out of order
Most Honest - Benny admits that he would get back with Amanda "in a heartbeat"
Biggest Huh? - Why would someone taking steroids, who is having a great career that might go further, suddenly decide to tell on his coach and teammates? That doesn't make any sense to me, especially since the rapist obviously didn't have a lot of morals guiding him.
Biggest Hint - Bull's father(?) was abusive
Biggest Twist - the podcaster is murdered when she agrees to release the research
Saddest True Statement - Woman: "Doesn't matter if you really did it. All that matters is that people think you did it."
Weirdest Name - tossup between Cable and Chunk
The "It's All in the Family" Award - Benny and Bull are ex-brothers-in-law

Best Quotes -
1. Reese: "You're right. I couldn't stand Mike, but I was the last person who wanted him dead. I wanted him alive because I wanted him to pay for what he did. I wanted him to go to prison. I wanted him to feel what I felt and I wanted to ask him, "How powerful do you feel now?" And I'll never get that chance. He is the one at peace, not me. Yes, I get these panic attacks because I was raped and bullied, which is exactly how you're making me feel. I couldn't stand up for myself then, but I am stronger now. So, ask your questions, Ms. Prosecutor. I have nowhere else to be. I did not kill Mike Tasker."
2. Benny: "I quit when I realized I worked for a place that cared more about getting convictions than having them."
3. Chunk: "Reese, you're going to appear in front of the jury today. What you wear in court is as important as what you say. You're wearing…I don't know what you're wearing but it's at least 3 sizes too big." Reese: "They're comfortable." Chunk: "That's not comfort, Mama. That's camouflage."
4. Bull: "You know, if hacking doesn't pan out for you, I think you have a career as a shoddy journalist."
5. Bull: "You've been running since your senior year of college and I have some news for you. What happened to you isn’t going to change, but you can't let it define you."

Code Black - 2.03 - Corporeal Form

Okay, I am saying this right now. If Mike dies in 2 weeks, I am going to be ticked off. Just saying. This episode of Code Black is really hard to grade and review because parts of the episode were so great but others were mind-numbingly bad. What I like about Code Black is how it takes all these different stories and weaves the essential heart of each of them into a more realistic view of hospital life. The penis subplot had zero heart, just idiot. But the other two stories were full of heart. I felt so much empathy for the father who thought he overdosed his son. The actor who portrayed him (Jamil Walker Smith) did a fantastic job of showing the heartbreak and guilt. The boiler room story also worked for me because it showcased Noa so well. She came off even better than last week. Ethan also scored high points in this one for his compassion and sticking to his convictions no matter what. The new characters this season are phenomenal. Sadly, their awesome makes Campbell and Heather's utter suckitude even more glaring. Not kidding, they need to go! Now! Every scene they are in drags down the episode with unnecessary, contrived drama. We don't need that kind of pointless drama because the cases provide enough drama on their own. Campbell is no longer a foil for Rorish. He's just a straight up douche.

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch - everyone who gave Campbell what's what
Best Scene - Angus tells his dad to stuff it
Best Character - Noa
Best Back Story - Elliot was put into the foster care system when he was two
Best New Character / Best Problem Solver - Nolan for bypassing the psychiatric rules for the medical to keep the patient in the hospital for a longer time
Best Life Hack - Putting your tongue to the roof of your mouth steadies your hands? Interesting…if it's true.
Most Ingenious Solution - Noa uses a skateboard to get to her trapped patient
Most Likely to Fight for Her Students - Rorish, who doesn't want Charlotte sidelined
Biggest Smack Down - Noa to Heather over Barry
Biggest Mystery - Ethan's death
Biggest Heartbreak - the kid OD'd on cough syrup because he didn't want his mom to yell at his dad over him getting sick
Biggest Shock - Campbell seems halfway human when he's worried about the baby and starts smiling when she takes her first breath
Biggest Brat - the teen who got jumped into the gang
Dumbest Storyline - Adding a supernatural element with ghost patient. What the heck?
The "Most Right and Yet the Most Wrong" Award - Campbell is dead right that they cannot have someone under review practice medicine without opening themselves up to a huge liability case. However, he is a dead wrong douche about every other thing he does in this episode.
The "What an Idiot!" Award - there is nothing romantic about putting an engagement ring on your penis, even if it doesn't get stuck there
The "Just Go Away" Award - Campbell and Heather, who about ruined the episode for me
The "Welcome Back" Award - Kathleen Rose Perkins from Fresh Off the Boat and Colony / Angus' dad

Best Quotes -
1. Noa: "I got stuck like this once. I was scuba diving in some caves." Barry: "How'd you get out?" Noa: "Just kept kicking toward the light." Barry: "You seriously telling me to go towards the light?" Noa: "I'm telling you to keep kicking."
2. Angus: "Mike was with me when I was in rehab. He was the only person who was there for me during my darkest time. I will not abandon him when he is at his."
3. Ethan (to Campbell): "Do you want to treat anyone at this hospital?"
4. Ethan: "See. I think you're missing the obvious diagnosis. She's a ghost." Nolan: "Then she's a ghost with depression or a psychosis."
5. Ethan: "Soy taco? What the hell's that?" Charlotte: "This is Los Angeles. It's not uncommon." Ethan: "This is occupied northern Mexico, young lady. I'm not saying we should give it back, but please. A little respect."
6. Heather: "This might be the coolest procedure you ever do here." Noa: "And here I am worried about Barry…the patient?"
7. Campbell: "I need to do something about him." Rorish: "Is it Willis you don't like or the fact that he's right?" Jesse: "It's probably both."

Conviction - 1.02 - Bridge and Tunnel Vision

After the pilot, I needed Hayes to grow on me fast. Instead, I found her more appalling in this episode than the first one. She is way too bratty for me, going after a case just to screw with her boss. It would be different if justice were even a part of her consideration but instead she seems to focus solely on how much pain she can cause others in her life because she's unhappy. GROW UP!!! While I like the team and the cases have been interesting thus far, Hayes is deal breaker for me. I have no time to devote to an adult who acts more childish than my elementary school kids.

Grade: C-
Bottom Line - dropped due to Hayes being a bratty douche

Best Reason to Watch - the case
Best Scene - Hayes and Jackson dance
Best Played - Conner takes credit for Hayes re-opening one of his old cases
Best Reaction - no one on the team cares if the only reason the Senator knows their names is because a staffer briefed her on them
Best Gesture - Maxine gives Tess the location of the man she falsely put away even if Tess throws it back in her face
Biggest Douche - surprisingly it is the media instead of Hayes for going after the attack victim
Biggest Good Guy - Sam, even though Hayes is a witch to him
Biggest Dilemma - let all three people go free when you suspect one is a psycho or let all three stay in jail when you think 2 are innocent
Biggest Smoking Gun - the lying schmuck whom Zadie slept with
Most Manipulative - Harper visits Hayes so she can tell Conner what Hayes is working on
Most Uncomfortable - Hayes when her mother says she's proud of her
Most in Need of Furniture - Frankie
Most Tenacious - Lisa, the reporter who's determined to bring down Hayes even when Sam sticks up for her
Most Scary - when the psycho kid grabs Hayes' arm and says the beads are his
Most Bratty / Most Vindictive - Hayes wants to only go after cases Conner prosecuted just to hurt him for…giving her positive press???
Most Wonky Science - Timing the assault victim and the attackers because they have nothing to base how fast the victim walked or if she went directly to the spot they are timing. No one walks home as fast as Maxine is going.
Funniest Moment - Hayes sees a stranger in her bed and checks his pulse to make sure he isn't dead
The "I Don't Get It" Award - Why did they change the brother? The one in the screener was fine.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Daniel Franzese from Recovery Road / Frederick Waller from In Plain Sight

Best Quotes -
1. Hayes: "Next time you want to check up on me, find a different spy because I'm never sleeping with someone already in bed with my mother."
2. Frankie: "So much for keeping Wallace in the dark." Sam: "We've been pulling files, asking questions. Word gets around." Hayes: "Says the guy who probably helped it get around, but what's done is done. Let's get back to getting these kids off." Sam: "Says the woman who claims to have no agenda but the truth."
3. Conner: "Checkmate."
4. Harper: "Conner Wallace is our friend." Hayes: "We're Morrison's. We don't have friends. We have supporters." Harper: "We also have enemies. Don't turn Wallace into one."
5. Hayes: "She only knows your names because a staffer briefed her." Sam: "I don't care."

The Flash - 3.02 - Paradox

Let's face it. The first half of this episode pretty much sucked. Felicity telling Barry to get off his keister, stop lying, and fix his mess was about the only plus. Well, and Tom Felton who is always a welcome sight. Here's hoping he doesn't end up being Alchemy or another bad guy. It is a switch that someone is anti-Barry and I don't need that to be a big, glaring sign that he's evil. Barry lying to everyone was a straight up course in what NOT to do in any sci-fi/fantasy show. The team was emoangsty with drama or irrelevant to the story (looking at you, Wally). Plus, the whole mood of the show made me wonder if I was watching Arrow, and not just because Felicity showed up. Team Flash was a huge downer in this first half, and I don't ever need mopey Cisco again. Good thing the second half fixed everything in trademark Flash style. Have a problem; resolve it in 30 minutes or less. While I tend to make fun of this facepalm way of writing, I was glad for it here because everyone is reunited again and in 2 episodes we are so close to being back to where we were last season. Not excited about the hint that Alchemy is going to restore everyone's superpowers because that means Wally is going to become the umpteenth speedster on this show. At this point, everyone should just become one and level the playing field.

Grade: C

Best Reason to Watch - the second half
Best Meta Ever - Henry Flash stops Barry in 1998 and Dawson's Creek is playing on the TV. John Wesley Shipp, who plays Henry here, also played Dawson's dad.
Best Tag Team - Cisco and Barry, which leads to their reconciliation (I hope)
Best Workout - Barry running between Iris and Joe to make dinner plans
Best Sounding Board - Felicity, who tells Barry to tell his family and friends the truth, which would be a whole lot more helpful than trying to guess how things changed
Best Speech - Henry Flash to Barry Flash
Absolute Worst Rewrite (plot) - Making Joe and Iris estranged over her mother. The very best thing about Iris last year was that she forgave Joe instantly because she realized he was just doing what he thought was best for her. To erase that, even if only for the span of one episode, undoes all the great insight from last season.
Worst Rewrite (character) - mopey Cisco may be a meatier role for the actor but it sucks for me as a viewer
Single Worst Plan Since the Last Time Barry Had a Plan - Going back in time AGAIN. That's it, Barry. You don't get to make the plans anymore. That's now Wells, Caitlin, or Joe's job.
Most Green Goblined - Rival
Most Repetitive - all the freaking speedsters
Most Needed - Cisco banter
Most Awkward - Barry's team dinner party
Most Ridiculous - These crossovers. I don't watch Arrow so did Diggle have a baby daughter for a few episodes on Arrow and now he suddenly has a son? Or did they ever say on Arrow what gender the baby was? I hope it's the latter because how are they going to explain the change on Arrow to people who don't watch The Flash? These crossovers need to go almost as much as time travel does.
Biggest Blech - It's not even the romance at the end. It's that Jesse the Brat is coming back. Didn't we finally get rid of her? Sigh.
The "Oh Thank Goodness" Award - Iris and Joe reconcile so we don't drag out this estrangement any longer
The "Welcome Back" Award (character) - Felicity from Arrow / Henry as The Flash
The "Welcome Back" Award (actor) - Tom Felton from Harry Potter

Best Quotes -
1. Barry: "Why have these powers if I can't go back and fix what I broke?" Henry Flash: "We're not gods. We're men, who, for whatever reason, have been given extraordinary abilities. The question you need to ask yourself is, what kind of hero are you gonna be? Are you just gonna take a do-over every time you make a mistake or will you live with them and move forward?"
2. Felicity: "There's a whole new guy at work that you didn't even know about?" Barry: "Yeah, he's worked there for almost a year and he doesn't like me very much apparently." Felicity: "Well, that's impossible. Everybody likes Barry Allen. You're like pudding. Everybody likes pudding." Barry: "Not everyone."
3. Cisco: "Stay away from my friend."
4. Felicity: "Okay well, you're gonna figure it out. If there's one thing I've learned from you, it's that with you anything is possible." Barry: "Why? Cause I'm The Flash?" Felicity: "No, because you are Barry Allen, and sweet, loving, kind Barry Allen that everybody likes. The Barry Allen who's just like pudding can fix this, so go and fix this."
5. Cisco: "Epic fail, party of 6."
6. Julian: "You've really got this good guy routine thing down, haven't you? And everyone just buys it. There is something not right about you, Allen. They don't see it... but I do." Barry: "Is that right?" Julian: "Yes. You know why I don't actually like you, don't you? I don't trust you and I don't like things that I don't trust. See you tomorrow, roomie."

Fresh Off the Boat - 3.01 - Coming from America

Fresh Off the Boat is often my favorite current comedy because of Jessica so it's no surprise that the heartwarming scene between Jessica and Louis is my favorite. This episode gave us a chance to see Jessica in her native land, but it isn't what she expected. Life is different there now, but she soon realizes it is because she was seeing Taiwan through rose-colored glasses. She has changed and she isn't afraid to admit that to Louis when he's feeling down because his brother is doing so well for himself. That, by the way, was the worst part of the episode. Watching Louis sulk and whine because his brother was doing better than he expected was a big letdown. Generally it is Eddie who is the big baby but Louis took that spot in this episode. It's a good thing they reconciled at the end or I would be tempted to throw all the socks at him. The kids didn't have much to do in this one but Eddie took up his fair share of time on the pointless shoe video. Time which could have been spent on Evan, Emory, or Grandma. I would have liked to see more about what Grandma thought about being back in Taiwan. After all, she lived there longest.

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch - I missed Jessica
Best Scene - Jessica reassures Louis that they are doing well
Best Reaction - Eddie to hearing that the Lakers drafted Shaq
Best Recap - Louis telling the customs agent why he's coming to Taiwan
Best Reference - Ghost and Richard Marx
Worst Job - playing message runner between the two brothers at the hotel
Most Prepared - Evan, who went to AAA to see what he needed to pack
Most Interesting - Taiwan customs includes "family members wronged me" as a reason for visiting
Most Obnoxious - Louis to meeting Margaret
Most Jealous - Louis
Most Ubiquitous / Biggest Product Placement - McDonald's
Biggest Waste of Time - Eddie's music video about his shoes
Weirdest Reason to Reconcile - Gene is impressed that Louis paid for last minute tickets direct to Taiwan
The "Welcome Back" Award - Wai Ching Ho from Daredevil

Best Quotes -
1. Louis: "I'm sorry I couldn't give you a life like the one Gene and Margaret have here." Jessica: "What are you talking about?" Louis: "You've always said how much you miss Taiwan. Maybe we should move back. Things would be easier." Jessica: "No, they wouldn't - it's hot, crowded, there's mosquitoes, a sick obsession with the movie Ghost. Everybody here knows everybody else's business. Even shopping at the Night Market isn't as fun as I remembered." Louis: "You're just upset because of what happened with Eddie's sneakers." Jessica: "No, that's not it. I know I've been saying how different things are here. How they've changed, but it's not true. They're the same. I'm the one who's changed and I'm homesick for Orlando. You know what I miss, bagels. I want a bagel. I didn't even think I liked bagels but I want a bagel."
2. Evan: "Dad, are we poor?" Louis: "What? No, of course not. American middle class is like Taiwan rich so..." Emory: "I'd rather be Taiwan rich."
3. Louis: "Well, I still think we'd be able to afford a better life in Taiwan." Jessica: "Through shortcuts and connections, yes, but you have worked hard for everything you have. You've earned it. No one's given you anything. We did it, Louis. We moved to America and we made it. We are the success story." Louis: "I guess we are. I mean we did fly Economy Plus." Jessica: "Besides no one loves America more than you. As soon as we move back here, you would miss it over there." Louis: "And as soon as we go back there, you know you're going to miss it over here." Jessica: "Well maybe we won't feel completely at home in either place."
4. Jessica: "Give up the dance, Gene. The song is over."
5. Big Auntie to Jessica: "Your negotiating muscle has atrophied."

The Goldbergs - 4.02 / 4.03 / 4.04 - I Heart Video Dating / George! George Glass! / Crazy Calls

The Goldbergs is pretty much my standard for a comedy. It makes me laugh each episode but it also adds a little something special. In this case, it's a whole lot of heart. On that note, these episodes all delivered. Still the best part of the show so far is that the Goldberg parents don't seem to be giving into their kids' every wish like the last two years. Thank goodness. I love that Murray did not give Barry the car to go to the concert, especially since Barry has a van of his own and needs to learn to take care of it. Erica also gave in when it came to the answering machine, while Murray told both kids "no" when it came to changing the message. This is a more realistic view of parenting in the 80's and it is a welcome change. In fact, it is a wish list item fulfilled so far. The only kid that got their way was Adam and to be honest, he should have. No one needs their mom messing with their high school existence, especially when he found somewhere to belong. While I don't care for Erica pining so hard for Geoff and the middle episode had a lame fake boyfriend story, overall I am very happy with this season of The Goldbergs so far.

Grade: B / C / B+

Best Reason to Watch - it always ends on a high note of heartwarming family bonding
Best Scene - Murray concedes to Mexican food for Beverly
Best Meta - the two Mike Levy's from the real Adam Goldberg's life play computer technicians here
Best Gesture - Adam gets a fake boyfriend for Erica
Best Reaction - Beverly to seeing that Pops is into video dating
Best Teamwork - Erica and Barry when trying to change the message
Best Reference - Jane Fonda / all the people Barry names for Live Aid / Oregon Trail / Trapper Keepers
Best Memory - Apple 2e and dot matrix printers
Best Puns - Adam's dating video
Worst Reason to Miss a Concert - fighting over a parking place
Worst Plan - using Village People as a foundation for a dating video / making up a fake boyfriend
Least Likely to Understand Boundaries - Beverly
Most in Violation of Child Labor Laws - no way Zoe was old enough to be waitressing even in the 80's
Most Enthusiastic - Coach to becoming Barry's mentor
Weirdest Interference - Beverly pays the jocks in waffle fries to let Adam sit at their table
Biggest Moron - Johnny Atkins
Biggest Oxymoron - Fighting Quakers
Biggest Huh? - Why is Barry being a gym coach a bad thing? It actually makes sense for Barry's personality. Best Music - Listen to Your Heart by Roxette / God Only Knows by The Beach Boys
The "Welcome Back" Award - Bill Lewis and Pop-Pop

Best Quotes -
1. Murray: "Look, I'm a stubborn b**. I always will be, but I realize the most important thing for me to be stubborn about is making you happy."
2. Dating Service Guy: "I don't know who this Geoff guy is, but I think he may have dodged a bullet."
3. Adam: "Um, maybe I could sit with the preppies?" Glascott: "Come on, man. You want to walk around in boat shoes with no socks? You want to invite that kind of fungus in your life?"
4. Barry: "Okay, you know how all the awesome stuff happens in New York and LA and Florida but never here…" Murray: "You do know that Philadelphia is the birthplace of our country, right?"
5. Bill: "A robe is just a long jacket made of towel. Lots of people wear these." Lainey: "Not to other people's homes." Murray: "In this house, we keep it loose."
6. Beverly: "I didn't do those things for me, Murray. I did them for the people I love. So yes, I'm stubborn when it comes to my family, but you…you're only stubborn for the things you want and that's not just being stubborn. That's just being plain selfish."

HTGAWM - 3.04 - Don't Tell Annalise

Grade: B

Best Reason to Watch - back story and an update on Frank
Best Scene - Frank kills Bonnie's dad
Best Character Interaction - Bonnie and Asher
Best Back Story - Frank in jail
Worst Twist - the teacher and student are having sex and the teacher is pregnant
Worst Advice - Bonnie tells Laurel not to tell Annalise that Frank killed Bonnie's father
Biggest Blow Back - the client, who reams Bonnie for not looking out for his future child who will now be born in prison
Biggest Child - Connor, for trying to hurt Oliver by hooking up with others in front of him
Biggest Confession - Annalise tells Eve that she spent Sam's insurance money to hire a hit man to kill Frank
Biggest Waste of Time - Conner's ménage trois
Most Nervous - Asher
The "Welcome Back" Award - Eve

Best Quotes -
1. Bonnie: "Blame me. None of this is on you." Asher: "No, I don't blame you. I'm proud of you. You made him see the person she really is."
2. Annalise: "You people want a fight, I'll fight." Hargrove: "Listen…" Annalise: "You forget that my ability at kicking a** is precisely why you hired me." Hargrove: "Shut up, Annalise! You come in here, yelling at me, your boss, and you think that's gonna get you what you want. It won't, so let me put this simply for you. There's a saying where I come from. 'Whoever can't hear must feel.' " Annalise: "So do it. Make me feel." Hargrove: "Somebody already did and now you've lost your license to practice. Hurts, doesn't it?" Annalise: "You can't fire me because of this." Hargrove: "Check your contract. Without your license, your tenure gets nullified. Next time you want to meet, make an appointment with my assistant."
3. Eve: "better to just make a statement in private. Promise to go to anger management classes." Annalise: "I'd probably hit people there too. I really need to retire."
4. Michaela: "Oh, give me your phone. I'm really good at picking out guys." Laurel: "Since when."
5. Nate: "You're an alcoholic." Annalise: "Of course I am, and that's not just the vodka talking. That's the me I've always been."

No Tomorrow - 1.02 - No Crying in Baseball

What I really liked about this episode was the ending. The second half was so much better than the first, which kind of dragged on and had some pacing issues. It was also very awkward, but I really, really like how they pulled it all together in the end. The foam party was awesome. I want to do that too. I also liked Timothy and Hank's interactions even if I'm not fond of love triangles. They were fun and less annoying than most things Jesse. My biggest problem with Jesse is that he plays the quirky best friend but we already have quirky in almost every single character. That's a quirky overload. Plus, he reminds me of those terrible Geico caveman commercials. I'm glad that he's been (dumbly) shipped off but I worry that he'll come back again before the show is canceled. And it will be canceled. I just haven't decided yet whether that is a good thing or not. Mostly because just when the show gets too silly for me, they rescue it with the heartwarming scenes that made up the entire end of this episode. Besides, they have the start of a great sister relationship between Evie and Mary Anne here and how often do we get that?

Grade: B-

Best Reason to Watch - the sister relationship went from Mary Anne putting Evie down in the pilot to an equal and supportive friendship
Best Scene / Most Fun - Xavier and Evie dancing in the washing machine bubbles
Best Character Interaction - Hank and Timothy, who are super fun together
Best Relative - Xavier, who sticks by his cousin even if it is not in his own best interest
Best Ex - Evie, who keeps reassuring Timothy even though they broke up
Worst Plan - shipping Jesse to a foreign country
Least Romantic Topic - talking about the apocalypse while creating a romantic setting
Least Noble - taking a broker's fee for all the embezzled funds you gave to charity
Biggest Douche Move - taking back the batteries in your ex's smoke alarm
Biggest Surprise - Timothy can actually carry off the hipster look in a way most people cannot
Biggest Mystery - Xavier's past
Most Considerate Gift - Deirdre buys Hank an ergonomic chair
Most Likely to Be Half Naked in Every Episode - Xavier
Most Heartless - Kareema and Hank, who bet on whether a laid off co-worker cries or not
Most in Need of Screens - Evie, who apparently doesn't care how many bugs she lets into the house
Most Awkward - lunch when Deirdre joins them
Second Most Awkward Conversation - Timothy and Evie
The "Awww" Award - pictures of Xavier and Jesse as kids

Best Quotes -
1. Timothy: "You sure he dresses like this?" Hank: "He's so fashion forward, it's like he's in the past and in the future at the same time."
2. Evie: "You're risking everything on a hunch!" Xavier: "Well some risks are worth taking, Evie. We all get to decide what's important to us, end of the world or not."
3. Timothy: "Hank says that he's super handsome and dangerous." Evie: "Well you're handsome too." Timothy: "But not dangerous?" Evie: "You always made me feel safe and that was one of my favorite things about you."
4. Xavier: "Look. It's one thing for me to take a risk, but I can't put you at risk. You matter to me."
5. Mary Anne: "I'm trying out nicknames for him." Evie: "Yeah and you're 0 for 3." Mary Ann: "Hey wait….um, seriously. I'm…I'm really happy that you're so happy about this guy."

Scorpion - 3.03 - It Isn't the Fall that Kills You

This episode was a complete waste of my time. Only Cabe and Sylvester saved part of it between the long, drawn out pandering to shippers and the completely unbelievable plot. You only get one more episode Scorpion before I drop you to "marathon later, maybe" status.

Grade: D-

Best Reason to Watch - You got me. I wish I hadn't.
Best Advice (Toby) - Leave this episode alone. Pretend it never existed.
Best Advice (me) - Scorpion writers, immediately exit social media and stop pandering to the loudest fans
Best Pep Talk - Toby to Paige
Best Continuity - Admiral Pace from last episode is referenced in tonight's episode even if he is not seen
Best Plan - Paige kicks everyone out so they can't hear what she says to Walter
Worst Safety Precautions - if lightning can ignite your rocket and launch it, you need to add more safeguards before you put people in it
Worst Time to Be Put on Hold - when you are falling out of an aircraft with no parachute
Most Incredibly Far-Fetched - this entire episode and that's saying something considering that they are on the third season of incredibly far-fetched episodes
Most Honest - Paige would do anything for any of the team members, not just Walter
Most Disturbing - Walter has clocked Paige and Tim's moments to the minute so he can avoid them
Biggest Mulan "Boy was I a fool in school for cutting gym" Moment - Walter doesn't get Tim's reference to cradling a football
Biggest Hero - Cabe
Weirdest Moment - watching Sylvester, Toby, and Walter meditating
The "Only Walter" Award - no one but Walter could take baked Alaska and turn it into a science lecture
The "Me Three" Award - I'm with Happy and Cabe. The dialogue in this episode is making me sick too.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Richard Elia

Best Quotes -
1. Walter: "Okay, this is where a plan would be useful. Please tell me you have one." Sylvester: "Hold please."
2. Sylvester: "We really shouldn't be listening to this. He doesn't know what he's saying. He's sick." Happy: "What he's saying is making me sick." Cabe: "Making me sick too."
3. Toby: "We covered this in medical school. Falling thousands of feet without a parachute, it's bad for your health." Tim: "I'll catch him." Toby: "Um, I don’t think they make baseball gloves that big."
4. Happy: "Last time you did this?" Cabe: "30 years ago." Happy: "Wow, I'm not even 30." Cabe: "Shut up."
5. Toby: "If Walter knew we were seeing this, he'd choose to remain in space."

Timeless - 1.02 - The Assassination of Abraham Lincoln

I like Timeless but I don't love it. My biggest problem is that they are far too reckless with history. They already know that what they do in the past could affect their futures but I see no more caution in them in this episode than they had in the pilot. They don't seem to care that their actions could change everything and they don't seem to be learning from their mistakes. I want them to do everything in their power to stay more historically accurate in future episodes. As it is, I didn't like this episode as much as I liked the pilot. I do like the characters, so that's a start, but the Rittenhouse thing feels like a stock distraction that will be drawn out for the longest possible time, making me less interested in it every episode. It doesn't help that it makes Mason seem like an even bigger douche when he has zero competition for the crown right now. At least screw him over by having Rufus tell his time-traveling team about it sooner rather than later so they can all work on finding info and taking down Mason together. That would put them on the same playing field and keep us from having too much betrayal drama in the future. To be honest, I think I would like this show better without the overarching serialized elements that cast a big shadow over the episodes but may very well go nowhere fast. On a plus side, the costuming and scenery people need to get bonuses for doing such a standup job. Whoever is fact checking the episodes also deserves kudos because I am learning more about American history here than I did minoring in it in college and in a much more entertaining way. All the Lincoln stuff was intriguing.

Grade: C+

Best Reason to Watch - the standalone elements
Best Pep Talk - Wyatt to Rufus
Worst Subplot - Lucy's father isn't her biological father
Least Stealthy - this trio who have a big conversation while tailing John Wilkes Booth, making no effort to stay quiet
Least Needed - they don't actually need to tail Booth because Lucy already knows where he is going
Least Fortunate - getting shot in the Civil War era, which isn't exactly known for their medical knowledge
Least Surprising - Mason knows about Rittenhouse and continues to be the shadiest character
Most Surprising - Rufus knows about Rittenhouse, which is most disappointing
Most Composed - Lincoln's son while telling Lucy that his father is dead. It's disconcerting really.
Most Helpful - Jiya, who offers to help Lucy figure out why her sister was never born
Most Needed - Background info on Flynn, because right now he feels crazy for crazy's sake and that is never interesting for long. He can say he's trying to save America from Rittenhouse but right now I have no reason to believe either are pro-America.
Most Sad - Rufus having to write up the notice for the soldier looking for his formerly enslaved wife, knowing that Lincoln's death ends any hope that African-Americans would have at equality for a century
Most Interesting Tidbit (IMDb) - the guy who plays Abraham Lincoln has played him in 5 other shows
Most Intriguing Tidbit (history) - Edwin Booth actually did save Robert Lincoln's life a few months before his brother took Abraham Lincoln's life
Biggest Surprise - Lucy's fiancé, whom she has never met, which gives her the opposite problem to Raimy on Frequency
Biggest Idiot - John Wilkes Booth, and not even because he shoots Lincoln but because he is more concerned about the theatrics of it instead of the logistics of it
Biggest Dis - Who on this production doesn't like Donnie Wahlberg?
Biggest Huh? - Why did they open with Booth shooting Lincoln? That's fairly common knowledge. It's not like they were going to lose us by not explaining it.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Neal Bledsoe from The Mysteries of Laura

Best Quotes -
1. Wyatt: "Trick-or-treat." Rufus: "Trust me, no one is more aware than I am that I am not a real soldier." Wyatt: "Where did these getups even come from?" Rufus: "A Civil War re-enactors' club." Wyatt: "No wonder they smell like sweat and loneliness."
2. Wyatt: "An actor?" Lucy: "Pretty well known too, but his brother, Edwin, was literally the most famous actor in America. John never quite measured up." Rufus: "So this is like if Donnie Wahlberg assassinated the president?" Lucy: "Pretty much, actually."
3. Lucy: "You need a real doctor." Wyatt: "To do what? Leech me?"
4. Wyatt: "Rufus, I don't know you well but in the last 2 days, you helped us break out of jail, you held a knife to a Nazi's throat, and you pulled a bullet out of my gut without puking. You won't freeze." Rufus: "I'm scared." Wyatt: "I wouldn't go into battle with you if you weren't."
5. Lucy: "Since we got back from 1937, what has changed for you?" Rufus: "I just had an unsuccessful evening with a girl so nothing, really."
6. Rufus: "This is gonna be the worst game of Operation ever."

Younger - 3.03 - Last Days of Books

Grade: B-

Best Reason to Watch - Bryce vs. Diana
Best Scene - the book club
Best Way to Stop a Flirtation - tell the interested party that your fiancé just died
Most Improved - Charles
Most Awkward - Liza tries to hug Diana
Most Fun - Liza and the Great Wall
Most Interesting Metaphor - Kelsey and sharks
Biggest Save - Bryce's douche move
Biggest Laugh - the VR meeting
Biggest Uh-Oh - Lauren cheats on Maggie with a guy she met at camp when she was a kid
The "So Millennial" Award - Instead of Code Red, it's Code Bread
The "Welcome Back" Award - Michelle from the book club

Best Quotes -
1. Kim: "And let's not let ego get in the way. If you need me, you know where to find me." Diana: "Where's that? Narnia?"
2. Max: "Should I get us a drink before we start talking Color Wars?" Lauren: "Yeah, yes. I have a lot to say about that actually. That Blue Team was definitely doping."
3. Charles: "He's giving us a lot of money. I think he just wants to be heard." Diana: "Well I hear him. The question is should I be listening."
4. Maggie: "Look Lauren, I mean this with love. Stop trying to be so interesting." Lauren: "Excuse me." Maggie: "Just date the guy."
5. Liza: "Sounds messy." Maggie: "Speaking of, how's Josh?" Liza: "I'm lying and he's wasting his youth, but I think we're happy." Maggie: "Enjoy it and don't think about it so much."

About the Author - Dahne
One part teacher librarian - one part avid TV fan, Dahne is a contributing writer for SpoilerTV, where she recaps, reviews, and/or creates polls for Teen Wolf, The 100, Grimm, How to Get Away with Murder, The Librarians, and others. She also runs the annual Character Cup. She's addicted to Twitter, live tweets a multitude of shows each week, and co-hosts The 100 "Red-Shirted" and Teen Wolf "Welcome to Beacon Hills" podcasts for Southgate Media Group. Currently she writes a Last Week in TV column for her blog and SpoilerTV. ~ "I speak TV."
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