Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Teen Wolf - 4.10 - Monstrous - Best Scene Poll and Bingo Card

I wasn't able to finish my Perishable recap before Monstrous aired on Sunday, so it was too late to post on SpoilerTV. If you'd like to read it, find the recap here. Also you can find the official Bingo card for 1.11, links to 7 others, and directions for how to make your own Teen Wolf Bingo cards here. Enjoy! Let me know if you get a Bingo next week.

Teen Wolf Bingo - 4.11
Someone mentions GreenbergA new bad guy is revealedDoucheDad flashes his badgeSomeone kissesKira brings out a sword
Someone bleeds on hospital floorDeaton is no help at allSomeone liesSomeone's shirtless (Bonus if NOT Derek)Liam gets wet
Talk about money woesSomeone's eyes glowKira acts awkward or stuttersRecurring character bleedsThe vehicle Stiles drives breaks down or crashes
Someone plays lacrosseSomeone dies in school, woods, or hospitalAwkward talk in locker roomA scene so dark you can barely seeLydia finds something horrible
Big plot twistScott is thrown against a wallMalia looks confused and badassScott/Derek gives a stirring speechA formerly "dead" person appears

About the Author - Dahne
One part teacher librarian - one part avid TV fan, Dahne is a contributing writer for SpoilerTV, where she recaps, reviews, and creates polls for Sleepy Hollow, White Collar, Grimm, Teen Wolf, and others. She's addicted to Twitter, live tweets a multitude of shows each week, and co-hosts the Sleepy Hollow "Headless," and Teen Wolf "Welcome to Beacon Hills" podcasts for Southgate Media Group. Currently she writes a Last Week in TV column for her blog and SpoilerTV. ~ "I speak TV."
Recent Reviews by Dahne (All Reviews)

Monday, August 25, 2014

Teen Wolf - 4.09 - Perishable - Recap and Episode Awards

Previously - Lydia cried, The Benefactor released a dead pool list, Parrish was shockingly worth $5 million, Beacon Hills turned into an assassin haven, Malia found out Peter is her father over Stiles' objections, Scott guessed the Benefactor was a banshee based on really sketchy assumptions, and Lydia found her granny's dead pool code.

The scene opens to find Parrish zip tied to his steering wheel while DoucheCop, who harassed Teen Derek earlier, throws gasoline on the police car. Always knew you were a jerk. Didn't know you were a pyro too. Parrish awakens so DoucheCop throws gas on him too. With all the Beacon Hills money woes, this guy sure wastes a lot of good gas. To be fair, he expects to get $5 million for Parrish's steaming corpse so I guess it's an investment. Oh and DoucheCop is an assassin. I knew Beacon Hills couldn't afford to look too deeply into their employee's pasts. Only the shady would work here with its crummy insurance package and high death rate. They're lucky to get applicants at all. Parrish tries to reason with DoucheCop to no avail. "Hey listen, I mean I barely make $40,000 a year." DoucheCop: "I only make $36." Ha! Not helping. Parrish: "You're just going to stand there? You're just going to listen to a fellow deputy burn to death?" Nah, the douche is prepared. He puts in ear buds and I laugh. Stone Cold Cop Assassin tosses in a lighter as Parrish goes up in flames. I'd be worried but it's the cold open. He's not dying. Evidently resurrection is a season 4 theme since Stiles and Lydia convince Sheriff that Granny Banshee is alive and kicking too. They theorize that she's the Benefactor or working for him. I still call shenanigans, but they peak Sheriff's interest and he asks DoucheCop if he's seen Parrish. He's a convincing liar but needs to watch a cop show. You don't use your work laptop when arranging payment for a hit. To channel Hermione, "What an idiot!" Not that he's getting paid because an extra crispy Parrish comes to work and he's irate. DoucheCop goes for his gun but it's a one and done with assassination for him. Parrish takes him down but in the chaos Sheriff gets shot because NOTHING GOOD CAN HAPPEN TO HIM! Oh Sheriff. Parrish wails DoucheCop unconscious if not dead while the Benefactor denies his request for payment. This really didn't work well for you, Douche. Good. 4 minutes and someone's already died and been resurrected, one's beaten to a pulp, and another shot. Welcome to Teen Wolf.

Back at his ramshackle loft, Derek takes up palm reading. Huh? No wait, he confirms Parrish is alive. No wait…oh who cares. They recap the open for anyone coming in late and Lydia and Derek discuss details but Parrish is a big picture guy. "I was set on fire. All of me should be gone." Ha! He's definitely no werewolf but Derek pulls a Deaton and has no clue what he is. Scott reminds us that he knew about Jackson and Kira but no dice for fans tonight. Parrish calls time out at the word bestiary and they laugh at his naiveté when he calls Lydia a psychic. Oh baby, you're about to dive head first in the weirdness they call Beacon Hills. Derek and Scott have a silent conversation (awww) when Parrish asks what they are, so Scott flashes his alpha eyes. Strangely they never show Parrish's reaction. Sheriff however reacts big time to the hospital costs of being shot. What the heck? He gets shot in the line of duty and his insurance doesn't pick up the tab? I call shenanigans! Leave Beacon Hills now. They don't deserve you. Apparently getting shot is no longer an emergency at Beacon Hills Memorial either since he has to wait until the next day for surgery. Again, "What the heck?!?" Stiles demands some respect for Sheriff, who's more worried about the bottom line so Stiles goes full blown, nail chewing worried. Sheriff: "Hey, stop that. I was just curious about the terminology. We're not in any kind of dire straits." Stiles calls his bull and admits to spying on him since, well at least the pilot. Sheriff is not happy. Stiles: "I go through all your stuff, especially when you keep things from me." Sheriff: "I keep things from you because you don't need to know everything." Stiles: "Yes I do. I have to know everything. How the hell else am I supposed to take care of you?" Yeah, wrong thing to say. Sheriff adamantly declares it's his job to take care of Stiles, not the other way around. I agree but theirs is not a typical situation. Stiles: "We're supposed to take care of each other." Awww, poor babies. Sheriff deflates and he says they'll be okay. Stiles: "How do you know, dad?" Sheriff: "I don't but the morphine's kicking in and I'm not all that worried about anything right now." Ha! Stiles isn't as lucky. That's one freaked out teen.

Parrish is one freaked out and confused adult. They really need a chessboard because kanima is throwing him for a loop. Scott bottom lines it with the dead pool list, but poor Parrish has no clue what he is. Derek: "I'm pretty sure they don't care." Ouch and true. Problem is it's not just pros anymore, since Parrish is sure DoucheCop is strictly amateur hour. The music ramps up when Parrish asks how many people have the list, so that's frightening but since the scene turns into mopey Liam, I officially don't care. Until his printer goes psycho, spitting out multiple copies of all 3 lists until he finally unplugs it. Well scratch eco-terrorists off the list. The Benefactor kills more trees than supernaturals. Seriously dude, try mass e-mail or text. Save the planet. In the most abrupt scene change yet, we flash in on Meredith at the lake house. Ah, it's a Lydia-exposited flashback of a random character. Every season has one. Granny Banshee's girlfriend died in a boating accident on the lake after she had her first supernatural experience while at work for IBM. (Smarts definitely run in Lydia's family.) The sound of rain kept getting louder until she screamed and a banshee was born. Sadly there's no banshee mentoring program so she turned to parapsychology, mediums, and psychics for answers. The white room was created for their pseudoscience study but things went poorly until she found Meredith at Eichen House, even though Granny doesn't look old enough and Meredith's the exact same. Do banshees age? While using Meredith as a guinea pig they almost killed her, leaving her in the hospital for over a year and nuts. Lydia: "My grandmother drove her insane and I drove her to suicide, and all she ever wanted to do was help." Urgh! Lydia hands Scott the code her grandma created but she's as helpful as everyone else in Beacon Hills so no cipher key. It's all over Parrish's head, who just sits in his police car staring at his hands. Helpful clue to what he is or more proof Teen Wolf directors have a hand fetish? You decide.

Meanwhile I air Gibbs slap Derek for leaving a hand gun on his bed. Guess Braeden forgot safety lessons. Scott picks it and questions Derek about it. He confesses that his werepowers are basically gone so Scott adds more bad news. "Your name broke the third list." Wait a minute! You didn't tell Derek his name is the third cipher key? Foul on that play! Foul on Derek for not sharing his becoming human problem too. Nothing good comes from these secrets, guys. What are you, Winchesters? Scott: "It could mean that you're in danger." Derek: "Scott, banshees don't predict danger. They predict death." Duhn, duhn…nope, not happening. Jeff Davis finally realizes how important you are Derek, so you live at least another season. I guess the conversation wrapped up quickly after that because it's another bizarre cut to Scott leaving his room. He gets distracted by Garrett's blood money duffle when he realizes the zipper's slightly undone. Did someone skip Personal Finance class because it's time to get a safety deposit box or open an account somewhere, Scott. He very dramatically counts the money and from the angle I can't tell if there's money missing or not. I assume Stiles took some. Regardless it is utter filler which will probably be discussed next week so it could have waited until then. So could Liam's berserker PTSD, but they have to get Mason and Liam's contracted time fulfilled. Amazingly the annual super important lacrosse bonfire we've never heard of before is tonight and Mason wants to find a man. Liam is uninterested but best friends totally override you when you're in a funk. It's their job. Coach's job is to discourage teen drinking by saying its stupid and putting Scott in charge of narcing. Nice. Way to put him on the spot. Scott's more worried about Liam's anxiety and tries to talk to him but they are interrupted when Coach's printer goes mad, spewing hundreds of copies of the dead pool list. It's revised. Derek's off the list and Liam is worth 18 million. Say what? Why? Let me guess…Liam's a true alpha. Blech!

Thankfully it's back to Stiles and Lydia, who try to decipher Granny Banshee's new code. It isn't going well. Stiles tapes a picture of Granny and her girlfriend to the Plexi Wall of Death while Lydia guesses the cipher key. Stiles suggests Maddie, Lydia, and ScienceMom to no avail. ScienceMom makes no sense anyway given she's the daughter-in-law. I'd guess dad's name first. Stiles: "Do you have any beloved family pets?" Ha! Not helping. They get increasingly frustrated while the printer beeps, "Feed me." Stiles puts paper in while having a breakthrough - focus on Lydia instead of Granny since the code was left for her. So Lydia brainstorms reading The Little Mermaid with her. Stiles: "You read that movie?" (Facepalm and head shake.) Lydia sets him straight about Hans Christian Anderson and remembers making everyone call her Ariel. Bingo - another dead pool list comes up, this one including Granny Banshee's name. They take it to Parrish. "Well it's not another dead pool. More like an Already Dead Pool." He explains that everyone on the list committed suicide at Eichen House. Yikes, I'm not sure which needs to be salted and burned most - the high school, the hospital, the sheriff's station, or Eichen House. They are all storing some seriously bad mojo. Plus now they have to break into Eichen House, which is a whole lot harder than breaking out. Stiles thinks a bribe will work, which can only mean DoucheOrderly. Argh! Please go away. No such luck. He wants $1,000 and a chance to keep insulting Stiles to open the file room. At this time I expect Stiles to pull out the blood money, but it's Lydia walking around with $500 cash. Say what? I thought everyone was broke but apparently they just have never heard of banks. Who walks around with that much cash? Better question - why does DoucheOrderly have a mix tape on cassette no less? Stiles and Lydia exchange a silent conversation and then DECIDE TO FOLLOW HIM ANYWAY. Are you people nuts?

We interrupt this very important development to join yet another Teen Wolf rave. I can't even. This one takes place AT the high school. No way teens get drunk by a fire at a sanctioned high school event. In fact, no way a high school sponsors a bonfire anywhere anymore after the Texas A & M disaster. School district lawyers would never permit it. Still Malia is a balm for my suddenly throbbing head. (In my best granny voice: "Turn down the music.") She tries to cope with her 99 problems by getting drunk, but the writers Scott remembers all the way back to season 1 that they can't get drunk. Kudos! Flo the continuity fairy is proud. Malia's not the only one trying to drink her sorrows away as Mason tells Liam to drink up. "Maybe then when I ask you what's going on you'll be too drunk to lie." Ouch. Mason: "I'm not asking because I want to know. I'm asking because I want to help." Aww Mason, you're making it very hard to keep disliking you for replacing Danny. Why couldn't you be yet another douche or teen assassin? Instead it's Liam who's the douche. He looks over at Malia before going for another round. You deserve better, Mason. Malia deserves the truth but not tonight. Scott: "I just want to talk." Malia: "I just want to dance." Ha! Scott presses on about trying to protect her but she interrupts. "That's what Peter said you would say. And guess what he said next? That you were right. Does that surprise you?" Scott: "No, it makes me wonder what he wants." You and me both, honey. Malia cuts the conversation off when Scott brings up Stiles, which signals big emoangsting ahead but again not tonight since she stumbles, forcing Scott to catch her. Malia: "Is this what drunk feels like? It doesn't feel as good as I hoped." Scott: "I don't think you're supposed to." Nice PSA, MTV. I approve. Liam is also down for the count. For the love of my sanity, please tell me there is not wolfsbane or mountain ash in that bonfire.

Not to be outdone, Stiles and Lydia allow DoucheOrderly to lock them in the file room. When Lydia hands Stiles the list, he finds that she added his name. Never a good sign. They are too busy arguing to notice DoucheOrderly slip back into the room. Again not a good sign. He tases them and laughs about it. Two thoughts race through my mind. 1. They should have outed DoucheOrderly earlier. His maniacal laugh is chilling. 2. Will someone please give Stiles and Lydia self-defense lessons? It's been over a year since Scott turned. They've faced werewolves, hybrids like the kanima, evil druids, evil humans, and a nogitsune. It's beyond time they know how to inflict some damage before getting taken out. Maybe Braeden can teach them. She goes in to grill DoucheCop and ends up breaking his nose when he gets sassy. Two thumbs way up! Sadly the rave music also gets pumped up. Scott drags Malia to Liam, but before he can get them out he falls ill as well even though he abstained from alcohol. He makes another wild conjecture based on…I don't know what, and tells Mason the music is killing them. It's killing my head too. Enough Teen Wolf. Scott tells Mason to watch the others as he turns it off, but all werecreatures get rounded up by security and taken to the school hallway. Mason tries to come with but Head Security Assassin shoves him away. Obviously there's an Assassin Cop poker group because they came to burn on DoucheCop's orders. Huh? Another $7.85 in gasoline is poured over Scott's head. Immolation is all the rage in Beacon Hills these days. Yet another reason to move. As Head Security Assassin flicks his Bic in Scott's face, Mason shows a decided lack of upper body strength as he wrestles to unplug the amp and kill the music. I guess it's a very strong plug. Still he succeeds and the world goes blissfully silent. Alpha eye-ing out Scott takes the lighter to close it in the most dramatic fashion ever. You re-lid that lighter, Scott. Luckily Braeden and Derek arrive at that moment and the only action of the night breaks out. Derek takes down two assassins while Braeden makes sure Mr. Bic won't walk anytime soon. Awesome! Scott: "What happened to the gun?" Derek: "You're covered in gasoline." I adore Smart Derek. Being human suits him.

Back at the precinct, Parrish realizes all the suicides were co-signed by DoucheOrderly. Couldn't catch that before Stiles and Lydia were tied up in the File Room of Predicted Banshee Death? Lydia weakly screams for help. She must be losing her voice because we all know she can scream louder than that. Stiles says it's a waste of time anyway because a lot of people scream in Eichen House. For those not4 paying attention, Lydia spells out that the alleged suicides were actually murders. The rest of us already knew because we're smart like that. Lydia: "She predicted her own death. She knew I'd figure it out…" DoucheOrderly: "Once you were able to predict your own. But they weren't murders. I am not some serial killer like Ted Bundy, going around cutting up college girls." Stiles: "Nah, you're just an angel of death." DoucheOrderly: "I don't think you understand my level of commitment to my work here, Stiles." Jeepers, he's creepy. I like it. CrazyPants Orderly it is. He continues the delusion by saying he showed those patients mercy. "There are people here who don't simply need treatment. They need release. I helped them. I helped Lorraine." Lydia: "You killed her." CrazyPants, holding a cassette: "I helped her and now you can help me because there is something on it that has always bothered me." I cannot stress enough how awesome he is here. The acting in this scene is topnotch as CrazyPants forces Lydia to listen to a tape of her granny dying. Stiles voraciously protests. "Lydia, look at me. Don't listen. Okay, don't listen to it. Just focus on my voice alright? You don't listen to it. Block it out, okay? Lydia. Hey, turn it off." CrazyPants punches him, but I love when Stiles and Lydia pep talk to protect each other. They have a beautiful friendship. As CrazyPants holds Lydia's face, she listens to her granny beg, "Please don't hurt her." When CrazyPants asks who, she replies, "Ariel." That's one powerful banshee. Even more powerful is the acting. Not a word is spoken, but volumes are said by all three.

Lydia refuses to gratify CrazyPants with an answer, so he moves to Plan B. "We get a lot of teenagers trying to break into our drug cabinets. Most of the time they don't succeed, but you two look pretty clever to me." At least he's not underestimating them. CrazyPants is the Crowley of Teen Wolf. As he preps the syringe, he snarks, "I'll admit Stiles, I don't have any unusual talents like Lydia, but somehow I just knew we were going to get a chance to do this again." As CrazyPants goes to inject Lydia and Stiles yells, it is Parrish to the rescue. "Drop it. Take your thumb off that needle and slowly withdraw from her neck." That may be the weirdest cease and desist phrasing ever but it distracts CrazyPants, who decides taunting Parrish is his best plan. Okay. Because he is from Beacon Hills where it isn't a plan unless it ends spectacularly badly. CrazyPants: "Young deputy, you're just a kid. I bet you've never even fired a…" Bang! Parrish shoots him while I wonder where CrazyPants thinks he's been living. The Sheriff's office sees more combat action than a war zone. Of course he has experience even without the military background. Lydia and Stiles get Parrish up to speed while untying themselves, but CrazyPants has one more surprise for them. "You think it was me? That I was controlling her." He laughs through bloody teeth, sufficiently creeping me out. CrazyPants: "She was controlling me." As he dies coughing up blood, Lydia realizes the truth. Lydia: "It's not him. He's not the Benefactor." That is zero surprise but it still can't be good. Around the corner, a voice mutters, "No and he wasn't on my list but he was a bad person." Ladies and gentlemen, rising from the dead, we give you Meredith, the Benefactor. Duhn, duhn, duhn.

All in all I liked this episode and I have no idea why. All I know is any show that can take my least favorite character and turn him into the most riveting thing about an episode gets an air high 5 from me. This episode was all about Senor CrazyPants DoucheOrderly for me. They should have made him insane earlier and I would have rooted for more of him the whole time. Don't get me wrong. I'm ecstatic he's dead…or well, about as dead as anyone on Teen Wolf really can be. I hope he doesn't come back, but he absolutely stole every scene he was in tonight. Considering he was on screen with both Stiles and Lydia, that is a feat of work. I am also fine with Meredith being the Benefactor. I have no idea how logically they can get around her doing all this stuff unless she has an army of minions, but I love the idea of her being a criminal mastermind capable of fooling everyone. Smart villains are always more fun. I hope she escapes and plays a cat and mouse game for the remaining episodes. The biggest flaw of Perishable was all the filler though. There were lingering shots complete with dramatic music on the most random things and much of it felt like it could be cut or held for another episode. I also miss action. Season 4 has been too light on action sequences and it is throwing the pace off, making this the first Teen Wolf season that feels like its dragging a little. Usually Teen Wolf moves so fast it makes my head spin and I'm left gasping, trying to process everything that happens in an episode. This time there have been several episodes when I've looked at the time, wondering when it will end. That's not Teen Wolf so I hope we get action-packed soon. They are running out of episodes to pick up the pace.

Grade: B-

Best Reason to Watch - Benefactor revealed

Best Awww Scene - Stiles worries about Sheriff / Stiles worries about Lydia

The "Poor Baby" Award - Sheriff, who keeps getting hurt by the supernatural

Best Character Interaction - Stiles, Lydia, DoucheOrderly

Biggest Cliffhanger - What is Parrish?

The WTH Award - have to wait until next day to get bullet out of you

The "Mega Minor Drama" Award - for all those times when the drama and music outweighed what was actually going on in the story: unplugging printers, Parrish hands, counting money, lighter reclosing, super strong amp wire. You were like that cat that jumps out at the beginning of a horror movie. All build up and no pay off.

The "So Much For Money Woes" Award - Lydia, who carries $500 on her person in cash

The "Oh for the Love of My Sanity" Award - someone get Stiles and Lydia self-defense lessons

Biggest Leap - Scott decides it's not wolfsbane but music

The "Dude, It's Beacon Hills" Award - Seriously DoucheOrderly, cops at Beacon Hills get more combat experience than those on a warfront. Even if Parrish wasn't a vet, he's no rookie.

The "It's Not Just Werewolf Powers" Award - Evidently banshee powers go wonky as well. Granny Banshee couldn't predict that Derek would lose his werewolf powers. Maybe she mixed up Derek and Peter.

Screencaps by TV Den, Hypable, TV Unfiltered, Team TSD, Teen Wolf Wikia, Pinterest, and Forever Young Adult.

About the Author - Dahne
One part teacher librarian - one part avid TV fan, Dahne is a contributing writer for SpoilerTV, where she recaps, reviews, and creates polls for Sleepy Hollow, Arrow, White Collar, Grimm, Teen Wolf, and others. She's addicted to Twitter, live tweets a multitude of shows each week, and co-hosts the Warehouse 13 "Endless Wonder", Sleepy Hollow "Headless," and Teen Wolf "Welcome to Beacon Hills" podcasts for Southgate Media Group. Currently she writes a Last Week in TV column for her blog and SpoilerTV. ~ "I speak TV."
Recent Reviews by Dahne (All Reviews)

Sunday, August 24, 2014

Quote of the Week - Week of August 17

A weekly feature highlighting the best quotes on TV as picked by the Spoiler TV team this past week. We'd love to hear your picks too so please sound off below the article.

Doctor Who -

1. The Doctor: "Have you seen this face before?" Barney: "No." The Doctor: "Are you sure?" Barney: "Sir, I have never seen that face." The Doctor: "It's funny, because, I'm sure that I have. You know I never know where they come from, the faces. They just pop up, zap, faces like this one. Come on look at it, have a look, come on, look, look, look." (He wanders over to where a broken mirror.) "Look, it's covered in lines, look at it - but I didn't do the frowning. Who frowned me this face? Do you ever look at yourself in the mirror and think, I've seen that face before?" (Sandi and Bradley Adams)

2. Eleventh Doctor: "However scared you are Clara, the man you are with right now, the man I hope you are with, believe me he is more scared than anything you can imagine right now, and he needs you." Twelfth Doctor: "So who is it?" Eleventh Doctor: "Is that the Doctor?" Twelfth Doctor: "Is that the Doctor?" Clara (To both of them): "Yes." Eleventh Doctor: "He sounds old. Please tell me I didn't get old? Anything but old! I was young. Oh, is he grey?" Clara: "Yes."
Eleventh Doctor: "Clara please. ‘ay, for me, help him? Go on, and don't be afraid, he's alright. Good-bye Clara. Miss ya." (Sandi)

3. The Doctor: "You can't see me, can you? You look at me, and you can't see me. Have you any idea what that's like? I'm not on the phone, I'm right here. Standing in front of you. Please, just…see me!" Clara (looks at him, searching his face for...something...then smiles): "Thank you." The Doctor: "For what?"
Clara: "Phoning." (She hugs him) The Doctor: "I, I, I'm not sure I'm a hugging person now." Clara: "I'm not sure you get a vote." (Sandi)

4. Strax: "And we will not melt him with acid." (Bradley Adams)

Mystery Girls -

1. (entering the detective’s office) Holly: "Freeze! You have the right to remain sexy." Charlie: "She’s been practicing that the whole way here." Detective: "Don’t you knock?" Holly: "But you never knock." Charlie: "Yeah, you just say 'knock knock,' which technically isn't knocking." Holly: "Whatcha working on?" Detective: "None of your business." Holly: "Oh, looking at porn, huh? So what's your kink? Footplay, nurses?" Charlie: "Tennessee dumpling?" Holly: "Tennessee dumpling?" Charlie: "Yeah, you start with a washboard and a jug…" Holly: "Oh..." (Samy Bgs)

The Strain -

1. Gus' friend: "Where are we, man?" Gus: "One story above hell." (Tonya Papanikolas)

2. Setrakian: "You want to help fix this? You want to help me stop all of this?" Cab driver: "You can't fix crazy, man!" (Tonya Papanikolas)

Teen Wolf -

1. DoucheOrderly: "But they weren't murders. I am not some serial killer like Ted Bundy, going around cutting up college girls." Stiles: "Nah, you're just an angel of death." DoucheOrderly: "I don't think you understand my level of commitment to my work here, Stiles." (Dahne)  ~I am surprsied by how much DoucheOrderly captured my attention in this episode, considering how much I hate him.  Great work all around in this scene.

2. Mason: "I'm not asking because I want to know. I'm asking because I want to help." (Dahne)  ~I really want to not like Mason since he basically replaced Danny, btu he keeps saying things like this.

3. Scott: "What happened to the gun?" Derek: "You're covered in gasoline." Scott: "Oh yeah."  (Dahne)  ~The return of SmartDerek.  Oh yeah!  Please stay.

4. Stiles: "Lydia, look at me. Don't listen. Okay, don't listen to it. Just focus on my voice alright? You don't listen to it. Block it out, okay? Lydia. Hey, turn it off." (DoucheOrderly punches him.)  ~I love the friendship between Stiles and Lydia.  They are great working together to solve mysteries, but even better when they are protecting each other.

Young & Hungry -  The best part of the episode was Sofia impersonating Yolanda but that didn't translate through the quotes alone so I went with these.

1. Yolanda: "I think if I let him go, I'm not going to be the main woman in his life anymore and he's going to run off into the sunset with some new girl on that tandem bike." Josh: "Come here. He's not going anywhere….you pay all of his bills." (Dahne)  ~Awww, it's hard for a mom to let go and let her child grow up.  It's even harder to get them to pay their own bills.

2. Gabby: "Are you okay that I manipulated you into calling Cheryl? I had to. It's true love." Yolanda: "I know but it doesn't mean that I don't love you. I would be lucky to have someone like you in my family." Gabby: "You already do." (Dahne)  ~It's this family dynamic that makes Young & Hungry my favorite summer comedy.

About the Author - Dahne
One part teacher librarian - one part avid TV fan, Dahne is a contributing writer for SpoilerTV, where she recaps, reviews, and creates polls for Sleepy Hollow, Arrow, White Collar, Grimm, Teen Wolf, and others. She's addicted to Twitter, live tweets a multitude of shows each week, and co-hosts the Warehouse 13 "Endless Wonder", Sleepy Hollow "Headless," and Teen Wolf "Welcome to Beacon Hills" podcasts for Southgate Media Group. Currently she writes a Last Week in TV column for her blog and SpoilerTV. ~ "I speak TV."
Recent Reviews by Dahne (All Reviews)

Monday, August 18, 2014

Teen Wolf Bingo Cards

Updated with tweaked and new squares: DoucheDad flashes his badge, Someone bleeds on hospital floor, A formerly "dead" person appears, A new bad guy is revealed, Bromance moment

Here are the Bingo card choices for episode 4.11. If you would like to generate your own, go to Bingo Baker.  Click on Clone and Edit.  Scroll down and delete where it says Scott thrown against wall in the last square.  If you don't you might get it on your card twice.  Click on Generate.  Click on Play Online.  Viola - your own personal Teen Wolf Bingo card.

8 Different Bingo cards here - ready to print in pdf

Official Card below - online link

Teen Wolf Bingo - 4.11
Someone mentions GreenbergA new bad guy is revealedDoucheDad flashes his badgeSomeone kissesKira brings out a sword
Someone bleeds on hospital floorDeaton is no help at allSomeone liesSomeone's shirtless (Bonus if NOT Derek)Liam gets wet
Talk about money woesSomeone's eyes glowKira acts awkward or stuttersRecurring character bleedsThe vehicle Stiles drives breaks down or crashes
Someone plays lacrosseSomeone dies in school, woods, or hospitalAwkward talk in locker roomA scene so dark you can barely seeLydia finds something horrible
Big plot twistScott is thrown against a wallMalia looks confused and badassScott/Derek gives a stirring speechA formerly "dead" person appears

If you have anything to add for our Bingo cards, please comment below. Current Bingo Squares include: Scott/Stiles asks if someone's okay, Deaton is no help at all, Malia makes inappropriate comment, Kira acts awkward or stutters, Werewolf powers go wonky, Big plot twist, A parent is helpful, Someone dies in school, woods, or hospital, Peter or Stiles snarks, Lydia finds something horrible, Scott/Derek gives a stirring speech, Someone lies, Lydia stares blankly into space, Stiles says "What??", Derek frowns, Malia looks confused and badass, Derek gets beat up or tortured, Someone's shirtless (Bonus if NOT Derek), A teen skips school, A scene so dark you can barely see, Kira brings out a sword, Someone's eyes glow, Someone in school when shouldn't be, Liam gets wet, Scott is thrown against a wall, Scott is thrown against a wall, The vehicle Stiles drives breaks down or crashes, Someone growls, Stiles makes a funny face, Someone kisses, Someone mentions Greenberg, Recurring character bleeds, A party breaks out, Talk about money woes, Someone plays lacrosse, Awkward talk in locker room, Coach terrorizes students, Music played way too loud, DoucheDad flashes his badge, Someone bleeds on hospital floor, A formerly "dead" person appears, A new bad guy is revealed, Bromance moment

About the Author - Dahne

One part teacher librarian - one part avid TV fan, Dahne is a contributing writer for SpoilerTV, where she recaps, reviews, and creates polls for Sleepy Hollow, Arrow, White Collar, Grimm, Teen Wolf, and others. She's addicted to Twitter, live tweets a multitude of shows each week, and co-hosts the Warehouse 13 "Endless Wonder", Sleepy Hollow "Headless," and Teen Wolf "Welcome to Beacon Hills" podcasts for Southgate Media Group. Currently she writes a Last Week in TV column for her blog and SpoilerTV. ~ "I speak TV."
Recent Reviews by Dahne (All Reviews)

Sunday, August 17, 2014

Teen Wolf - 4.08 - Time of Death - Recap

Previously - Scott roared, Benefactor exposited, dead Meredith was in Lydia's lake house, FedDad (formerly DoucheDad) saved Stiles, and Malia learned about Peter despite Stiles hiding it from her. It rocked.

Over in Supernatural Crime Squad Central, Stiles tosses and turns hopefully from a guilty conscience for not telling Malia the truth. I have little sympathy for him right now. He flashes back to Malia sleeping soundly in his bed. Apparently he used to sleep in the middle but with Malia there, it's not an option. Of course she could sleep in her own freaking house. Just saying. He completely douches out by waking her. No wonder she kept scratching him. I'd bloody his nose. You don't get between a girl and her sleep time. Malia cares not one jot about invading his personal space and rolls back over. They snuggle side-by-side with her head on his shoulder but he's still not in the middle. Malia suggests spooning (by name even though it's not a vocab term coyotes likely hear often) with Stiles as the big spoon but that puts his arm to sleep. Next it's back-to-back. Stiles: "Well I don't like this." Malia: "I'm going to kill you." And no one would blame you, Malia. He apologizes and stares adorably at her so she decides to be the big spoon. Rather forcibly. Ha! Stiles: "I think this is good. Yeah this is good." Now wait a minute. Foul on that play. You are all into this position so no fair whining about it to Scott a few episodes ago. Sad Stiles awakes and realizes Malia is not in bed with him. He looks all woebegone alone in the middle of his bed. Good. One because he deserves to be dumped. Two because they are in freaking high school. Having to worry about what position to sleep in with your significant other is a problem for much later in life.

FedDad has much bigger worries though, like explaining why he shot Evil Scientist in the head with Stiles' head right next to him. He records his statement while Scott werelistens and we get a recapitation. Better than the yellow vomit from last week's recap. FedDad finishes and tells Scott he'll miss the first lacrosse game as he has to make an incident report in San Fran. Scott is fine; FedDad is not; I'm bored with endless apologies. Just pay for the darn electricity already. Scott looks at his gun in the evidence bag and FedDad assures him that he had to kill Evil Scientist. On first watch I had no idea why they had this conversation when it was obvious Stiles would be dead without him. Afterwards I realized it was an anvil dropping. Nice soft approach, Teen Wolf. Scott asks if he's killed before and the answer is twice, but it's never easy. Scott is so going to be forced to kill someone this season. No way this episode brings it up 19 trillion times if he doesn't. To belabor the point, Scott asks how FedDad deals but his coping mechanism of getting stone cold drunk is probably not the best. Compartmentalizing and logic is the new plan. Scott and FedDad hug and I let an awww slip out. I swear I'm getting soft these days, but I'm inching toe by toe into tolerating FedDad's presence on this show. Now go to San Fran and give me Mama McCall time. But not before telling Scott the jig is up. FedDad: "One more thing. When I do come back, we have to talk about some stuff. You and your friends, the way you guys handle things. It doesn't seem to faze you like it should. It's think you guys know something I don't. When I get back, I'd like to be in the know." Scott's "oh no" face would give it away if FedDad wasn't already suspicious. I don't care if I eventually grow apathetic to you FedDad, you don't get in on the secret this easily. Just no.

Speaking of secrets, Scott and Stiles must have spent some of Peter's money to supply them all with Macs given the pandemic financial difficulties in Beacon Hills these days. They talk about "doing it" tonight so based on 4 years of Teen Wolf, "it" must be a spectacularly bad plan. The fact that Liam thinks it's too bat-guano crazy doesn't bode well either. Liam: "But isn't it kind of dangerous?" Stiles: "Yeah, it's incredibly dangerous and borderline idiotic." Liam: "Have you guys done something like this before?" Stiles: "Something dangerous or something idiotic?" Kira: "I think it's a yes to both." Yeah, a definite, emphatic both to yes. Run while you still can, Liam, because this is the norm. Scott says he can back out. Liam: "I'm not scared." Stiles: "Well then you're borderline idiotic." Again, no borderline here. I do snicker at Stiles' wink. Not reassuring at all. Stiles questions the logic of the plan so even worse. I question why Lydia isn't here because she's usually the voice of reason. Plus, I miss her actually working WITH the pack instead of parallel to them. Basically the plan is to kill Scott and make the Benefactor come to them for visual proof. Oh where do I begin? Facepalm and deep sigh. Liam's hot dad is a small balm to my frayed nerves already but given he's the ER doctor on shift when Scott comes in, it's his job to pronounce Scott dead. Time of death - 9:02 pm. (I have no idea why the defibrillators didn't work though, given that Kira does the same thing they do.) Even worse, he has to tell Melissa that Scott's dead. Sucks to be him. Sucks to be Melissa more, whose screams break the hospital quiet. What the hell? They didn't tell her the plan? No freaking way Scott would hurt his mama like that. Foul on that play! All kudos to Melissa Ponzio here. Best acted scene of the night and possibly the season.

Apparently MamaFox knew though. Flashing back a few minutes earlier, Kira and she look over Scott while Liam again questions this idiotic plan. How in the world did Angry Blond become the voice of reason? Kira asks Scott to reassure Liam but Scott understands she really wants reassurance herself. Scott tells her he'll be alright. Aww. I swear this episode's in an alternative timeline, because main characters are ticking me off but for some reason I like Kira, Liam, and MamaFox here. Crazy Opposite Day shenanigans. Liam asks MamaFox if she's done this before but she's only seen it, which isn't even close. Kira: "Mom, you're not inspiring confidence." Mama Fox: "Good. This is a terrible idea." Oh MamaFox, if you only knew the other heart-stoppingly stupid plans they've carried out. Teen armored truck heist, anyone? Kira threatens to go ahead without her, so she gives directions. Basically Kira electrocutes Scott's heart…but not before he asks what'll happen. MamaFox says it'll feel like dreaming, whether those dreams are good or bad depends on him. From Scott's reaction, he knows it'll be bad because dude, it's Beacon Hills. Nothing goes well there. We both sigh as Kira juices him. Back in the present, Mama McCall wipes her eyes and breathes deeply, entering the morgue. "I still hate this plan. I mean this is pretty significantly terrifying. He looks dead." Team Flashback plus Stiles circles an unconscious Scott. I'm so glad they told her. Now she's the one I want to Gibbs-smack. How could you let Scott go through with this? MamaFox tries to reassure her that Scott's indeed alive, but she looks to Stiles first. He puts his hand on her back and says it's okay to give MamaFox her hand. Awww. I love Stiles and Mama McCall scenes. With MamaFox's help, she feels Scott's sluggish heartbeat. They have 45 minutes to find the Benefactor before Kira must revive Scott or he dies for real. Say what? Guess you neglected to mention that part to Mama. Devil's in the details. I'm back to wanting to Gibbs smack everyone. If I were her, I'd demand Kira bring my child back right now! After all, they only have to keep Scott hidden to perpetuate the myth that he's dead. Why not?

Over in Derek "I used to be a multimillionaire but live like the homeless" Hale's loft, Braeden (aka Mystery Motorcycle Chick) wakes to find herself in the bed and Derek on the couch. What a gentle…hey, wait a minute. Derek has a bed AND a couch. Honey, you're supposed to splurge before being robbed. Braeden tiptoes over to look at Derek's wound, waking him. Derek: "What are you doing?" Braeden: "Protecting my investment." Ha! Love the return to previous dialogue these days. She asks why Derek's not healing but he hedges. "Some wounds take longer." Braeden: "And some leave scars, but not for people like you so what's going on?" When he can't wolfeye, she knows something's up and demands the truth. Argent, on the other hand, demands payment. Stiles and he argue over a message to the Benefactor to tell him Scott's dead. Stiles: "That's your assassin speak?" Argent: "I said he's dead. What more do you want?" Stiles: "Well it's a little dry. You could have said something like target has been neutralized. You know, the crow flies at midnight. That's always cool." Oh Stiles, no more spy shows for you. The Benefactor wants visual confirmation but Argent says it's impossible since the police are transferring his body in 40 minutes. Nothing like cutting it close. What if the Benefactor doesn't live in Beacon Hills? What if he's on vacation? What if he has car trouble? Have I mentioned just how badly this plan sucks yet? Well I'm going to about 29 more times. One for every minute this episode has left. I do adore Argent and Stiles silently fighting over the laptop though. They need more scenes together. It reminds me of the Supernatural pilot and makes me laugh right until Argent gets tough. He tells the Benefactor if he doesn't get his payment, Argent is coming after him. I'd be worried, Benefactor. If looks could kill…just saying.

Braeden and Derek share much different looks as she patches him up. She tells him to watch for infection and the conversation naturally leads to…arm wrestling? Huh? Whatever. It's all foreplay. Braeden wins by punching Derek right in his wound. Braeden: "When you're human facing off against the supernatural, you need to bend the rules a little bit. I'm going to teach you how to bend." The subtext alone makes me long for a wolfsbane emetic, Day-Glo yellow or black. Thankfully it's back to Argent tapping the hospital security system so Stiles can front a telecommunications base for this brain dead scheme on a hospital bed. Argent, I know you can create better plans than this. Why not take lead here and teach them to strategize? No? Now I need aspirin. So might Scott with all his weirdo dreams. He "wakes" in the morgue drawer and in a scene reminiscent of Kate, climbs his way out. He's happily less werejag crazy though. As he walks down the hallway, Liam throws a ball at Scott in full Nike-endorsed lacrosse uniform. Got to keep those sponsors happy. How about keeping me happy? Liam for the first of 52 times: "That's why you're team captain." After that terrible tryout, I'm surprised Scott and Stiles are even still on the team. Just saying. Scott follows Liam into a classroom with a super cool 180-spin effect. He finds a dead pool code and types his own name as the cipher key. Up pops No Mouth, Crazy Teen Assassin, Blond Assassin, and Evil Scientist. Ha! I like this list so much better. Scott, not so much. He doesn't want to kill but Liam insists because he's the alpha. Scott starts the season 1 motto about being predators not killers. Problem is he can't get the "don't have to kill" part out. Another dead motto as No Mouth attacks Liam with the hatchet as Scott watches.

Malia might wish she was in a nightmare as she ignores Stiles' phone calls and walks into the Hale family vault. Peter as daddy is no dream come true, which he proves when he walks in on her opening the family safe by tearing off the handle. Peter: "I've got to buy a better safe." Oh Peter, this is how you start your first real conversation with your daughter? I laugh but worry about Malia's mental well-being. Inside the vault is Malia's adoption records, but Peter refuses to share. "I can't let you leave here with that." Malia: "Maybe you won't have a choice." Peter: "Is that right?" He guess Malia heard rumors that he's not strong enough, but I have no idea where this is coming from. Yeah Peter was at less than peak performance when he came back but he's been plenty strong since then. Why would anyone think he wasn't strong now? He proves his strength by punching a column in the vault. Malia's action is priceless and since she's the only realist tonight she rolls with the new knowledge and starts to hand the papers back. Live to fight another day and all that. Peter surprises her though. "I said you can't leave with it. I didn't say you couldn't read it." Not that it contains any viable information, just a large blood stain. Awesome. Peter: "You want to talk about it? See a family counselor?" Bwah! Malia: "There's nothing in there." Peter: "I cost me a lot of money for that file." Malia: "You got ripped off." Malia isn't buying it so Peter goes full sob story. Malia: "You murdered people. Not killed, murdered." Peter: "There were extenuating circumstances." You can almost hear the violins in the background as Peter whines about the fire and says he isn't the Benefactor. Hmmm. He plays his final card by telling Malia he can help her track her mom. That gets her attention. Well played, sir.

Back at Imbecile Station, Argent impatiently looks at his watch while the Mamas McCall and Fox stake out the parking lot looking for potential Benefactors. Since Pill Popper is most definitely NOT the Benefactor, Mama McCall asks the most logical question. "Why are we doing this? Why are we asking them to fight these kinds of fights?" MamaFox: "Because otherwise, we'd be asking them to run and hide." And? That sounds like a logical response to me. What is not even in the realm of logical is putting Kira, the only one who can save Scott, in danger. At the Hospital Bed Command Center, the roof camera goes down so Kira volunteers to check it out. Stiles: "Whoa, whoa. This might not be just a malfunction." Kira pulls out her katana: "That's why I'm bringing this." No offense, Kira, but you haven't had much luck with that sword. Right now the smart play is to send Argent with his gun or even Stiles with his baseball bat. He won't have any more luck than you, but he can't bring Scott back either and knows the value of running. Sadly, commonsense is the Big Bad tonight so Kira leaves. Liam: "I'm coming with you." Stiles: "Okay and you're both coming right back. Immediately." He sighs: "Kids." Bwah! Nice to know Stiles is their father. They run to the roof only to find themselves face-to-face with one of Kate's berserkers. Oh goodie. Lights flicker throughout the hospital after the berserker takes out the same box DarkStiles did last season. Flickering lights are the universal sign to run, but the residents of Beacon Hills have no commonsense either. Stiles looks for Argent and gets a gun cocked at his head for his troubles. Since this is either still the Saturday of the botched PSAT or Sunday, he's got to be sick of it. Luckily this time it is Argent, who lowers his gun and checks out his nifty product placed watch again. They've got 18 minutes and Kira's playing ninja on the roof. Naw, nothing wrong with this plan at all.

Hey, Lydia does exist. Good to know since it's supposed to be her year. Looking for answers, she heads in the boathouse when she hears someone behind her. Grabbing a boat oar, she almost brains her mom, who wears the world's most unflattering paisley shirt. Yikes! ScienceMom followed Lydia to the lake house, confused about why Lydia spends so much time there without a boy involved. Hmm, I'd be concerned if there was a boy involved as well but that's just me. Lydia: "Honestly mom, you don't need to be involved in every single detail of my life." ScienceMom: "No, but I'd like to help if I can." Aww, she's come a long way from being the most neglectful parent for the first 2 seasons. Lydia shows ScienceMom the picture of Meredith and surprise, she knows her by name. Sadly, it's back to Scott's nightmares before getting any answers. Flag on that play, Teen Wolf. It's a redux of catch, dialogue, and Liam murdered by No Mouth. Only difference is in between Scott checks out his teeth in the mirror. He has more fangs now so Liam and he debate whether it makes him stronger or more of a monster. While Scott ponders his existential dream self, Derek and Braeden decide it's a great time to flirty flirt over guns. Did anyone even call them about "the plan"? Perhaps they knew the new and improved Sensei Derek would balk at their cretinism. He also balks at guns. "I don't like guns." Braeden: "That's because you've never learned to use one." Derek: "Or because I've been shot…repeatedly." Good point. Braeden grazes over his concerns for the lesson. "You always want to remember how many shots you fire. Running out of bullets can get you killed. It also makes you look stupid." Ha! Another good point. The rest of the lesson is all Charlie Brown for me…wah, wah, wah. She takes the gun away from Derek twice but it's all just a disturbing foreplay before he kisses her and they screw. Oh no you didn't, Teen Wolf. Everyone Derek screws ends up evil, dead, or both. I like Braeden. Not fair.

Even a Kira-Liam stupidity pact is preferable. They attack the berserker to typical effect. Liam's thrown into fencing while Kira gets punched. It all looks fancy and it's the only action all night, so I hold to that. While unconscious, Kira flashes back to Scott and her on his bed talking about the plan. If she says it's a good plan one more time, they need to check for concussion. She's the ultimate yes-man girlfriend and that does neither any favors. Scott reminds us they still haven't gone on a date since Beacon Hills keeps getting in the way. May I suggest NOT bowling. Kira says there's no time. Scott: "We could make time." Kira: "Even though people are dying all around us." Again, what's with Kira and Liam being the voice of reason? No wonder I like them much more tonight. Scott agrees it'll have to wait so she suggests a movie when they do. Now that IS a good plan. Go with that…or let a frantic Liam rouse you from your sleep. The berserker is still there, so Kira suggests the run away option while Liam is stupid and attacks further. Huge sigh. I hope you die. Meanwhile the Mamas search the hospital only to find no one in the Hospital Bed Command Center and no video either. MamaFox: "I'm guessing the power doesn't go out very often in this hospital." Mama McCall: "Nope, only when under attack by supernatural creatures." Which is exactly why you should get Scott, call Kira, and get the heck out of there. 16 minutes left folks. Instead they stand around while everyone else runs screaming past them. Say what? Are you kidding me? Both these women are too experienced in the supernatural to wait around and yet they stare at each other until a berserker comes into view. Mama McCall: "Are you still a kitsune?" MamaFox: "Technically." They don't run until he comes after them. Ugh, the tomfoolery!

In the morgue, Stiles tries calling Argent but he's too busy being flung into the room by Kate. Argent yells for him to get out, but it's too late for that. Kate comes in the front and Stiles is stunned. Kate: "Get out of the way, Stiles. I'm taking the body." Stiles: "Why? Visual confirmation?" Kate: "Don't worry handsome. I'm not the Benefactor." Figured that out when you were worth 12 million on the dead pool. Argent pulls out a second gun - he was obviously a Boy Scout - and presses it underneath Kate's chin. Didn't we just learn NOT to do this? Kate agrees. "You're not going to kill me." Argent: "And I'm not going to let you take his body." Stiles: "Okay well obviously you guys have a lot to talk about so maybe…I saw some coffee, a vending machine outside." Bwah! Now there's the Stiles I know and love for the first time this episode. The others ignore him. Argent: "Listen to me Kate, we have a plan." Kate: "And if killing Scott was part of it, you're worse than me." Stiles: "He's telling the truth. We're trying to get to the Benefactor." Of course they are because Kate knows if Scott really had died, Stiles would be a mess right now. It's not just Mama McCall that would have been devastated. Kate sees Argent's watch and concerned face. They only have 3 minutes to save Scott now. Argent: "Take the berserkers and go." She complies while Scott takes trip #3 on the Nightmare Tilt-a-Whirl. This time instead of a ball, he catches a hatchet from a bleeding Liam, who says Scott did it. No Mouth helps Scott hone his technique before Scott butchers Liam. His eyes glow and his fangs protrude as blood splatters his face. It's gruesome but an awesome visual, even more so because Scott embraces his inner monster to kill the one he's supposed to protect. Best scene of the night! Until Kira revives Scott and he's brought back to the living. As he gasps for breath, Kira decides now is the perfect time to kiss him. He didn't need that air anyway. Oh Kira, and I liked you tonight. Scott asks if Plan A worked, but when does it ever on Teen Wolf? No Benefactor and MamaFox lies bleeding in the hospital corridor from the berserker attack while Mama McCall and HotDoc try to save her. Great plan.

Meanwhile Kate heads to Peter. "You were right. He's still alive." Peter: "Thank God." Yeah, but not for obvious reasons. You need to kill Scott yourself to take his power and become the alpha again. It doesn't negate you from being the Benefactor and in fact lands you squarely at the top of the list. Speaking of lists, Malia comes by Stiles' Supernatural Crime Squad Central to post the third dead pool list on the clear, brand spanking new, must have cost a fortune, Wall of Weird. Stiles enters and it's weirder than the wall. Never has a scene between these two fallen so flat or seemed so out-of-character. It starts decently with Stiles walking on eggshells since he screwed up so spectacularly. "Hey, where you been?" Malia: "Talking to Peter." Stiles: "Okay, think that's a good idea?" Malia: "If he can help me find my mother, I don't think I care." Stiles tries to tell Malia she's different from Peter, but she disagrees. Stiles: "Hey, you might be related to him, but you’re not like him." Malia: "Maybe I am. That night I caused the car crash…" Stiles: "You mean when you were out of control on a full moon." Very good point. Except why does he walk away from her, opening up space between them. That's not like him. Malia got into a fight with her mom that night and said she wished they would all die right before they got into the car. She's obviously hurting and feeling guilty. Stiles knows this and his facial expressions are dead on but he's still across the room. It's like the director said Malia needed space in this scene but it's negated by what we know of the characters and their facial expressions. The whole thing comes off as odd instead of poignant. At last he comes near her. Stiles: "Killing doesn't run in a family." Malia: "Maybe it does in mine." Oh baby, I feel for you. Your life has sucked out loud. She turns around, tapes the dead pool list up, and walks out the door. Stiles says nothing. Are you kidding me? This is a kid who doesn't give up when people he cares about are hurting. He'd at least yell her name a dozen times. Instead he stares as we get a close up on the list. Weirdest, out-of-character Teen Wolf scene ever.

I'm still bewildered as Derek gets out of bed and stares over an awesome, Winchester-like gun collection on his table. He should go work for Argent. Or Braeden should. Meanwhile Scott and Kira say goodbye before she joins her mom in Palo Alto and HotDoc runs tests on a resurrected Scott. Kira once again says this was a good plan. Maybe they think if they say it 23 times, the audience will believe it but not happening. Scott makes a huge leap and now believes the Benefactor is a banshee. Uh huh. Okay. That's the most logical conclusion. Away from that nonsense, Lydia tries to piece what ScienceMom is saying together. She pulls out Granny Banshee's ashes and presents them to Lydia. Eww, no thanks. Granny Banshee died in Eichen House (of course) and requested that Lydia spread her ashes over the lake when she became 18, which according to Teen Wolf is in a few weeks. Lilith, my podcast partner, was the first to yell shenanicanon on that one and she's dead right. Basically Teen Wolf is saying Lydia Martin, genius extraordinaire, will not graduate until she is 19. Oh yeah right. Shenanicanon! If this is so she can legally screw Parrish I am Gibbs slapping everyone in the writers' room! Lydia calls shenanigans as well because instead of ashes, she finds mountain ash. She tosses it towards the lake and it magically goes down the line just like at Scott's house in Silverfinger. Lydia: "The whole building. It's all made of mountain ash." Huh? You had two werewolves, a kitsune, and dancing drama down there 4 episodes ago. I will never understand mountain ash canon on this show. From the second we learned about Deaton's front counter in season 3 it has made zero sense. ScienceMom thinks the last note Granny Banshee wrote was utter nonsense too, but Lydia realizes it's part of the dead pool code. She asks if Granny is really dead, which throws ScienceMom for a loop. Doesn't faze me at all because I'm seeing red herrings all over that lake.

Teen Wolf simply does not do the heist/complicated plan thing well. It's no Leverage and they need to stop trying. The plot always sounds fun in concept but fails miserably in execution because it never makes any sense. If you try to apply the least bit of logic, it unravels like Aladdin's flying carpet. The sheer number of assumptions they make is staggering and makes me glad my life doesn't depend on them. First, they assume the Benefactor is currently in Beacon Hills or nearby. There's no evidence of that. Plus Beacon Hills County has 500,000 people, meaning statistically it should cover a decent area. They give the Benefactor 40 minutes to get to the hospital, sneak to the morgue, find Scott's body, and get out before the police arrive. Conservatively that gives him 20-25 minutes to get there. There are parts of my own county I can't get to in 25 minutes. Next they assume he is working alone. What makes them think he doesn't have allies at the hospital, sheriff's station, or coroner's office? Why risk getting caught by coming in person when you can have your local cop plant sneak peek for you when transferring the body? They also assume that the Benefactor cares at all about Argent's deadline. I wouldn't. Like Argent would know who the Benefactor is or where he is located. The Benefactor could wait until Scott's funeral to get visual confirmation and then wire Argent the money. It's not like an assassin will still go after you once you deposit the money even if he's ticked it was delayed. Then there's Kira not zapping Scott well before the time and just having Scott hide out awhile. If the Benefactor did have cameras in the morgue, the jig would have been up watching Scott's friends calmly hover over his body. They sure weren't grieving there, so shock him back to life and then park him away. In all honesty, I don't know how it ever got that far since the defibrillators should have shocked Scott back to life. I mean Kira is basically a walking defibrillator herself. She didn't do anything they wouldn't.

Speaking of Kira, having her on the roof fighting berserkers was the most brain dead part of this whole DOA plan. Well that and trying to sell me that Mama McCall, Argent, and Mama Fox all signed off on this lunacy. No parent ever agrees to this, supernatural kid or not. Then there's that huge leap of Benefactor banshees in the end. Really? Because common sense says the Benefactor didn't show up (or sent Kate) for the reasons listed above. All they know about banshees, they know from Lydia and Meredith. Neither had the power to say exactly which person would die, just that someone would so how's that helpful? A banshee confirming death is coming in a hospital is about as spectacular as predicting I'm going to purchase milk, bananas, Cheetos, and pizza at the grocery store. It's just going to happen. Nothing about this episode made any sense, but kudos to the acting. Melissa Ponzio rocked it hard in the scene where Mama McCall breaks down over Scott's death. Her screams still haunt me, even knowing the character was acting. I'm also curious by the frequently falling anvils practically yelling that Scott will kill someone this season. In fact I'm far more intrigued by who and the circumstances than anything else that happened in this episode. He's obviously going to have to kill in order to save someone he loves, but will it be his mom or Stiles? I certainly hope it won't be Liam or Kira. The reason the Motel California scene was so powerful is because it was Stiles who saved Scott, not Allison. If they want this to have the same emotional punch, it's going to have to be someone he considers family. And no, that doesn't include FedDad.

Grade - C-

Best Visual - Scott red eyed and covered in Liam's blood

Best Reason to watch - the acting

MIA - logic and common sense

Most Improved - Kira, Liam, Mama Fox, and FedDad in that order

Best Acting - Mama McCall breaking down at news of Scott's death

Best Moment - Mama McCall gets reassurance from Stiles before taking MamaFox's hand

Biggest Question - Is this the worst plan the Teen Wolf pack has ever come up with or is it still teen armored truck heist?

Biggest Surprise - Mama McCall knew all along / she didn't stop the plan

Most Practical Question - Why not use Kira to keep the food cool until Mama McCall can pay bills?

Biggest Missed Scene - Mama McCall beating them all for forgetting to mention that Scott might die

Best New Skills - Argent's surveillance hijacking

Best Character Interaction - the Mama's

Worst Déjà Vu - Scott crawling through the drawer reminded me of Kate in the 3B premiere

Most Interesting Camera Work - 180 of Scott walking into classroom. I hated it when it had no purpose in season 3 but here it helped sell the dream sequence weirdness.

Other Questions:

Why isn't Scott revived by the defibrillators if essentially that's what Kira is?
How did Kate and Peter know Scott's body was in the morgue if Peter isn't the Benefactor?
Do banshees predict the future as well because no one on the Benefactor suspect list would have motive to kill for that long except Gerard and I have no idea why he would wait so long? Plus Liam's still on it.
Is Meredith really dead? Did she know Granny Banshee? Is she the Benefactor?
Why exactly is Peter not supposed to be strong?
Was this episode set in an alternate reality where Kira and Liam are the best, smartest, and most rational?
How does Kate have control over the berserkers?
Is Braeden evil and/or destined to die now that she's screwed Derek?
Who will Scott save when he purposely kills someone this season?
Will Lydia ever get to work with the pack again this season or is she destined to be a lone wolf?
Will anyone ever try to stab the part of a berserker's body that isn't covered in bone, like his stomach?
Will Kira take her Hem Haw disease with her to Palo Alto or will Beacon Hills continue to be infected?
Will the pack ever create a plan that actually sounds like a good, viable, realistic idea?
Is Liam dressed in his lacrosse uniform purely to sell Nike products?
What should we call Liam's dad since I can't keep calling him HotDoc?

Screencaps by Screencapped.netHypable, Teen Wolf Wikia, Gotta Watch It, Geekiary, Forever Young Adult, Pinterest, TW Season 4, Pinterest Malia,

About the Author - Dahne
One part teacher librarian - one part avid TV fan, Dahne is a contributing writer for SpoilerTV, where she recaps, reviews, and creates polls for Sleepy Hollow, Arrow, White Collar, Grimm, Teen Wolf, and others. She's addicted to Twitter, live tweets a multitude of shows each week, and co-hosts the Warehouse 13 "Endless Wonder", Sleepy Hollow "Headless," and Teen Wolf "Welcome to Beacon Hills" podcasts for Southgate Media Group. Currently she writes a Last Week in TV column for her blog and SpoilerTV. ~ "I speak TV."
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