Welcome back to Last Week in TV after our one-week hiatus. I had planned to spend most of my time marathoning TV on my to-watch list but I was just hired for the summer session so chances are I'll only get to half of regularly airing summer TV as it is. If you are marathoning something that you're really enjoying, please nominate it in the short form below so I don't miss it. This week's nomination was Dexter and talk about a show that's easy to marathon. Netflix really makes it so you don't watch just one. I ended up watching Dexter for several hours straight. It was far better than I ever expected it to be, mostly because they don't glorify the antihero like a lot of shows and they don't make excuses for him. Still he has a code of honor that he does not deviate from and that gives him some boundaries. I recommend Dexter to anyone who hasn't tried it, even if you are skeptical about it like I was. Other than that, I am still a bit behind on a couple of shows like Community and AD, which I will add in to this post as I have time. Usually I do a season wrap-up column with overall awards and another one with a wish list for returning shows. I'm not sure I'll have time for that at this time but if I don't, I'll combine them with the summer wrap-up and post it in August. Thanks for joining me this season as we talked TV together. I love hearing your ideas and awards too so if you have any special awards for this week or this year, sound off in the comments below. Until next time, happy TV viewing to all.
Show of the Week:
The Flash - 1.23 - Fast Enough (season finale)
I know I always compare The Flash to Arrow, but that's the closest touch point I have for it. Usually The Flash comes out miles ahead of Arrow. I mean just compare Barry to Oliver or Wells to Merlyn. The Flash is simply better in their characters alone. Add its camaraderie and lighter tone and you have a superhero show I can get fully behind…even when they add time travel to the mix. Here though, it is different. The season 1 Arrow finale is one of the best episodes of TV I have ever seen and although this is an excellent episode, The Flash finale doesn't quite get there. In some ways it is similar. A cataclysmic event happens in both after they think they have stopped it. A secondary character saves the day and dies in the process of doing it. Both are overstuffed when they should have let the episode breathe a bit more. The big difference is the pacing and the ending. In The Flash's finale they added in stuff that makes no sense. Why throw in a random wedding? It also felt less like the end of the season than the beginning of the next one. In Arrow's season 1 finale, everything culminated to demolishing the city and Arrow fighting Merlyn. It felt like a definite end. This was far more like The 100's finale, in that the penultimate episode was more of a finale than the finale was. The fight with Wells lost some of its punch by putting it in last week's episode and making it only a small piece of the plot when it should have been the main event. I blame the need to crossover with Arrow and tie into the spin-off series. The Flash is much stronger when it plays out on its own terms and is not saddled with trying to boost other shows. I also think that Eddie's death didn't have the emotional pull of Tommy's on Arrow. In great part this is because Eddie and Barry didn't have the relationship that Tommy and Oliver had, but it is also because they forced his reconciliation with Iris into an episode that already had too much going on. It too felt rushed and thus a little less satisfying.
Still this is the best finale of the 2014-2015 TV season so far and it is in large part because of 4 very well done scenes. The opener with Barry confronting Wells set the tone off nicely. I love how Wells tells Barry that he looks on him with pride and love while at the same time telling him how much he hates Barry's future self. It is a rich dichotomy that Wells' whole mission is to kill the man he helped create. While they cheated us out of what has to be rich back story, what we do know is already powerful. Then to see Barry's reaction when Wells explains that he loves Barry too? Wow! That was some great acting there. The second scene that grabbed me is when Joe tells Barry that he should risk going to the past so he can have both parents in his life. I believe Joe is the most noble character on this show and to watch him risk his entire relationship with his son in order to give Barry a chance at his dream is both heartbreaking and inspiring. To give up your child, even to make them happy, has to be excruciating. While I was still trying to recover from the emotion of that scene, The Flash went and hit me hard with Barry's other father. I love how they set these scenes up back-to-back because it showed that both of them only wanted what was best for Barry and they would give up whatever they had to in order to give Barry what he needed. Henry telling Barry that nothing, not even saving his mother, was worth possibly risking the awesome man that Barry has become was just as heartbreaking. By reassuring that Barry's mother would have been proud of him too, Henry also makes the ultimate sacrifice to do what's best for Barry. Although the two men disagree on what Barry should do, they both have pure motives that speak volumes of their love for their son. Finally, we also get an amazing scene in which Cisco confronts Wells about the alternate timeline. I'm no fan of super-powered Cisco. I like him how he is, but the sheer pain and betrayal on Cisco's face when he relates what happened to Wells is like a sucker punch to the gut. Then Wells has the audacity to just brush off killing Cisco like it means nothing at all. It was startling and yet very much in character. If only a couple of these scenes had been in the episode, it would still have been strong. Having all 4 made it the best episode of The Flash yet. I don't get emotional in TV very often but there were several places in this one that got to me and that's the hallmark of a good episode.
Grade: A
Best Reason to Watch - a freaking black hole was created, which pretty much raises the tension
Best Scene - Cisco confronts Wells
Best Scene (runners-up) - Barry confronts Wells in the beginning / Barry tells Joe that if he time travels, he will lose Joe as a father / Barry and his dad at the jail
Best Pep Talk - Stein to Eddie
Biggest Shock - Eddie kills himself to keep Wells from killing Barry
Biggest Awww Moment - Harry at the prison telling Barry how proud he is of him / Joe reassuring that Barry will never lose him
Most Unselfish - Joe and Henry, who both give Barry conflicting advice because they think that is what is best for him even though their advice would hurt them
Best Change - in the opening spiel, we don't have the normal stock footage and Barry says that today's the day when he gets justice for his dad
Most Confusing - Future Barry has to save Young Barry before Barry-Barry saves his mom. Ugh, time travel.
Most Pointless - Barry traveling back in time did nothing but create a huge time travel problem
Biggest Psycho/Best Manipulator - I can't tell if Wells is trying to manipulate everyone or if he really believes the crazy he's spouting. One thing's for sure, his definition of love is way off everyone else's.
Biggest Huh? - I have no problem with Caitlin and Ronnie getting married, but what in the world made the PTB decide that the finale was a good place for it? There is far too much going on here. Save it for season 2. It's not like you don't have plenty of episodes left to create a memorable wedding scene.
Biggest Surprise - Iris and Eddie did not meet through her dad but through a mugging
Biggest Irony - Thawne had to create the very thing he set out to kill
Biggest Cheat - Wells says it doesn't matter why The Flash and he are enemies in the future but Barry and I really want to know
The "Nope, Still Not Interested" Award - Iris is not any more interesting than she was a few episodes ago
Biggest Ho Hum - Wells' villain monologue about always winning
The "What? Was There No 911 Back Then?" Award - I have no idea why Barry doesn't call 911 first and then have a heart-to-heart with his mom. Actually I have no idea why he time traveled in the first place except to help the spin-off along, which is a terrible reason to make such a huge cliffhanger.
The "Only on The Flash" Award - soda is once again used to figure out when things are happening
The "I Told You So" Award - Let me guess. Thawne figured out The Flash's alter ego because they were talking about secret identities in public places again. Or maybe he overheard the 1.2 billion times they call him Barry on missions. Actually he could just listen to the archived prison phone calls since they talk about Barry being the Flash in EVERY SINGLE ONE of them these days even though they know all prison visits are recorded and monitored. There is NO cone of silence, people!
The "Well That's One Way to Fly" Award - creating a black hole seems a bit extreme to satisfy your inner Superman
Biggest Name Dropping - Wells mentions Rip Hunter
Best Reference - The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
Best Quotes -
1. Barry: "I thought you were the sure one. I was kind of banking on that when I made my decision the first time." Joe: "I was faking it. Sometimes parents do that. Most of the time parents do that. Look, of course I'm scared but I didn't want you to not help your mother because you're worried about me." Barry: "Well I'll always worry about you Joe just like you'll always worry about me. I'm sorry but you can't stop that. Do you think I can do this? Do you think I can save my mom? I mean do you think I'm fast enough?" Joe: "Yes, I know you are." Barry: "You know I've…I've dreamed my whole life about saving her, freeing my dad, and…I never thought I'd have to lose another parent to do that." Joe: "Barry..." Barry: "Joe, it's true. It's true. I've always been so focused on everything that I lost that night but I gained so much too. I was born with one father and that tragedy gave me another and I don't think I can lose you." Joe: "You won't ever lose me. Ever, you hear me. Ever."
2. Barry: "Dad, look I know this sounds crazy." Henry: "I think we're way past crazy, slugger."
3. Barry: "We're gonna need something else too." Cisco: "Really? And what's that? 'Cause I don't know about you guys but I'm not at all interested in helping you get yourself killed." Barry: "I need you to build a time machine." Cisco: "Go on."
4. Wells: "I don't belong here in these barbaric times. It's like living amongst the dead." Cisco: "Is that what you told yourself when you killed me?" Wells: "What? What did you say?" Cisco: "It was an alternate timeline, one that Barry reset. I never forgot it. It just kept coming back to me and I can still picture the way you looked at me when you called me a son and you crushed my heart with your fist." Wells: "Cisco, I'm sorry." Cisco: "Yeah, it sucked." Wells: "Yeah, not for killing you. I'm sure I had a good reason."
5. Ronnie: "Now we just need to put it together." Cisco: "Ronnie, I love you but this is a time machine not a bookcase from Ikea."
6. Stein: "Once the collision happens a wormhole forms, opening a gateway into time itself. It's at that moment I plan on shouting something along the lines of 'Eureka!" or possibly "Excelsior!" I am uncommitted."
7. Barry: "I can save mom." Henry: "At what cost? You said time would change. What if it changes you?" Barry: "Well I don't care." Henry: "I do. I am in awe of the remarkable man that you are becoming. All the things you've achieved and not just as the Flash but you, Barry. Your honesty, your heart. You were always a hero and your mom would be just as proud and if she had a say in this, if she thought for one second that you going back to save her would mean you losing what makes you so special, she would never want that. Barry, what I hope for you, maybe the greatest thing that a father can hope for his son, is that one day you will become a father yourself and then you will know how much I truly love you."
8. Wells: "Well sure there's a bit of a risk." Stein: "I would hardly refer to causing an extinction-level event as a bit of a risk." Joe: "Yeah and your accelerator has been about as reliable as the beater I drove in high school."
Nominated Show:
Dexter - 1.01 - Pilot
Note: This review is based on the first 4 episodes. Later on there is more nudity and sex.
I didn't know what to expect from Dexter and in many ways I still don't. For a pay cable show, it is remarkably tame. There is little nudity and what there is doesn't show much. There's no sex thanks to a rape-trauma victim girlfriend, although there's enough sexual harassment to keep a seminar company in business for years. Even the violence is more tame than some of the crime procedurals on TV given that most of it is heard and not seen here. Criminal Minds has more graphic violence. Dexter does have plenty of gratuitous language though. What else it has is a premise more intriguing than I expected. I don't like Dexter and I'm not sympathetic to him but it's rare to see the world from a sociopath's viewpoint. To watch Dexter try to fit in an alien world reminds me a little of Monk but less funny and more creepy. It's sold by Michael C. Hall's stellar acting. I see why everyone was raving. Still the best part is the pacing. The show moves fluently between the serial and procedural elements with very little drag in between. So much so that I watched the first 4 episodes in marathon (all episode awards are from the pilot). If ever there was a show built for Netflix, it is this one and as long as it stays more in the PG-13 rating range than R-rated, I'm willing to see where it takes me.
Grade: B+
Ranking - 4
Audience - people interested in crime shows with a pretty big twist or character studies with a unique view
Best Reason to Watch - you rarely see things from a sociopath's point of view so it is intriguing to see how Dexter navigates a world in which he doesn't care about anyone but pretends to
Most Intriguing Character - Rita
Most Annoying Character - Deb, who may be the most annoying character I've seen all season
Best Perks of the Job - if you're going to be a serial killer, then there's no better way to get new job tips than to run the crime scene
The "Say What?" Award - His cop foster father helped him get away with murdering people? Trained him to be a successful serial killer? Is this what you're telling me, show? Was he a serial killer as well?
Most Creepy - serial killer violating your house and putting a dissected doll in your fridge
Most Adept - Dexter, who plays a human very convincingly what with his doughnuts and joking
Most Interesting Need for Clarification - Dexter assures us that he did not kill his foster parents
Most Disturbing - the sound of the drill is even more creepy than the guy screaming as he dies
Most Gratuitous - in a show about a serial killer, it's strange the most gratuitous thing is the language and not violence, sex, or nudity
Most Inconsiderate - all those people killing on weekends and making cops work instead of getting it on
Worst Decorating - blood spatter artwork for your office cubicle
Most Screwed Up in the Head - You think it's Dexter, right? Nope. It's his foster dad who encourages him to kill people and animals.
Biggest What the Heck - Dexter is driving and the guy just tosses a head at his car. Miami is screwed up.
Biggest Hmmm - Dexter is worried about driving with both hands on the wheel but he isn't at all bothered about killing neighborhood animals as a kid
The "Welcome Back" Award - Julie Benz from Defiance and No Ordinary Family / James Remar from State of Affairs
Best Quotes -
1. LaGuerta: "So then he must have already had the head with him in the front seat. Hhn. That's weird. Why would he keep it there?" Dexter: "I don't know. So he could use a carpool lane?"
2. Dexter: "There's something strange and disarming about looking at a homicide seen in the daylight of Miami. It makes the most grotesque killings look staged, like you're in a new and daring section of Disney World - Dahmerland."
3. Dexter: "Normal people are so hostile."
4. Dexter: "All in all it was a good night. One less amateur filmmaker polluting the internet."
5. Dexter: "Clean and easy. This guy knew how to use a blade." Cop: "So we're looking for a sushi chef." Dexter: "Yes, sushi chef is possible. It wouldn't be my first choice, but hey, you never know."
New Show:
Wayward Pines - 1.01/1.02 - Pilot / Do Not Discuss Your Life Before
Wayward Pines is definitely the most bizarre new show of the season. Its premise starts with an agent waking up in a small town hospital after being in a car accident. As he gets to know more about the town, it gets more bizarre and nothing adds up. Is it a hallucination? A nightmare? A psychotic break? An effect of concussion? Or a real place that reads like a cross between The Stepford Wives and The Hunger Games? I'm honestly now sure what this is, but I can't see how it can just be a hallucination when things are happening outside Ethan's perspective. I have no idea what the Secret Service has to do with all this either. Despite having a whole stock of questions and zero answers, the show's pacing is amazing in that just when I start to lose a little interest something new happens to get my heart racing again. I cannot believe they killed off Beverly like that. Is the entire town insane? Kudos to the director, cast, and crew for making a pilot this intriguing and a second episode that's even better. I can't wait to see the rest of this ride.
Grade: B+ / A-
Ranking - 1
Audience - anyone who likes creepy settings and "Say what?" twists
Best Reason to Watch - this is one of the few shows where having no clue what's going on actually makes things more interesting, for now
The "What the Heck" Award - people just stand around and clap while the sheriff kills Beverly
Most Nonchalant - the sheriff, about a dead body
Most Cryptic - Beverly says she "always believed" Ethan, like they've met like this before
Best Voice Mail - The Burke message says they are sorry to miss the call unless it's a telemarketer. Ha!
Biggest Ouch - duct tape as a bandage
Least Surprising - partner affair because it wouldn't be TV without one
The "Say What?" Award - if he breaks the glass like that, Ethan should not be able to grab it in his hands without cutting himself
Worst Plan - Ethan putting his tracker in his hotel bed sounds like a good idea but if anyone sees him elsewhere, the jig is up and so is the plan to escape
The "Little Warning Please" Award - Ethan digging out his tracker from his own arm
Creepiest Rules: Do not try to leave. Do not discuss the past. Do not discuss your life before. Always answer the phone if it rings. Work hard, be happy, and enjoy your life in Wayward Pines.
Biggest Huh - What does Adam in the real world have to do with Ethan in Wayward Pines?
The "Welcome Back" Award - Malcolm Goodwin from iZombie / Matt Dillon from my childhood and all-around 80's guy / Carla Gugino from Spin City and Karen Sisco / Toby Jones from Hunger Games and the voice of Harry Potter's Jar Jar Binks / Reed Diamond aka the bad guy in almost everything including SHIELD / Tim Griffin from Covert Affairs and Burn Notice / Juliette Lewis from Secrets & Lies / Terrence Howard fresh from Empire fame / Jarod Joseph from The 100 / Lindsay Hollister from Cold Case
Best Quotes -
1. Pam: "Oh we don't have anything of yours but I can certainly put on my Nancy Drew detective hat and check into that for you."
2. Ben: "Okay, get a room." Ethan: "Get a room? The last time we got a room, we ended up with you."
3. Sheriff: "You didn't make it too far, did you?" Ethan: "How do I get out of here?" Sheriff: "You don't."
4. Ethan: "Look, I'm a government agent." Sheriff: "Yeah and Mary Poppins is your grandmother. You're a guy with no ID, no badge, who just stole that car."
5. Sheriff: "We cannot tolerate people who don't play by the rules."
6. Pam: "Hold still Mr. Burke or I'll jam this bad boy straight to the bone."
Weekly Shows:
Battle Creek - 1.10 - Stockholm
It's not often that you feel bad for the good-looking, successful guy in a TV show. He's usually the douche to be honest. Yet I always feel bad for Milt because Russ is just so unlikeable to him but Milt keeps trying anyway. Even the escaped convict is a nicer guy than Russ. In fact, he's the reason to watch this episode. I loved the scene where he's walking his niece down the aisle with Russ attached to him with handcuffs. Ha! Battle Creek is a good combination of humor and action, which I'll miss when it ends.
Grade: B+
Best Reason to Watch - the convict, who was a pretty amazing man
Best Scene - Russ handcuffed to Ford as he walks his niece down the aisle and Russ and Milt tearing up about it
Best Awww Moment - Milt offers to trade himself as hostage for Russ / Russ and Milt hug when they find each other
Biggest Douche - Russ turning Milt down about going for a beer
Best Twist - the fugitive broke out of prison to walk his niece down the aisle on her wedding day
"The "Yeah, Definitely NOT an Idiot" Award - Ford slips Russ' phone into the car next to him at the gas station to get the Feds off his track
The "You Tell Him" Award - Ford gives it to Russ straight about what a douche he's being about Milt
Dumbest Kid on the Planet - What kid sees handcuffs and a guy mouthing "911" and does not get that something's wrong? Of course, it's a good thing that he doesn't because it was a stupid plan in the first place given that the convict has Russ' gun.
The "Does Such a Thing Exist?" Award - Are there people who get high off insulin? I never heard of that.
Best Plan - Russ says he's diabetic and needs insulin
Most Desperate Plan - trying to get the dog to fetch a hacksaw
The "Welcome Back" Award - James Le Gros from Justified and Ally McBeal / Kathleen Wilhoite from Gilmore Girls and Quarterback Princess, one of the few After School Specials I remember
Best Quotes -
1. Ford: "I feel sorry for you. I have more people that care about me in prison than you have out."
2. Russ: "I can't go through the rest of my life knowing that man saved me. He's a narcissistic, manipulative a** who the whole world treats like a god when he's really just the exact opposite." Ford: "Can I give you some advice?" Russ: "Sure." Ford: "Stop being a douche. What that guy did back there, you don't do that to manipulate somebody. You do that, you sacrifice yourself because you care." Russ: "No you see, you don't know him, okay? Milt always needs to be the hero. You know how many times this guy has had his picture in…" Ford: "It's a federal case and he asked for your help, right?" Russ: "Yeah he asked me because he knows that I'm better at it than he is." Ford: "Shut up. He didn't ask you because he needs your help. He isn't being a hero. He's being your friend. Lighten up. Loosen your sphincter for 20 minutes. Go have a beer with the guy. Let him into your life. Maybe get a life."
3. Milt: "You trust him? You….trust someone that I don't." Russ: "I'm just following the evidence, man."
4. Milt: "Is there anything you can tell us about the escapee…uh, Mr. Ford?" Warden: "Sure. He's an idiot. That's why I don't think I'm gonna need your help. He's gonna do something stupid and get himself caught."
5. Russ: "It's just a pointless, futile gesture to make him look good…" Ford: "Who cares? Sometimes the only way to care is with a pointless, futile gesture."
Battle Creek - 1.11/1.12 - The Hand-Off / Homecoming
While I care not one jot about Russ and Holly' relationship, these 2 episodes were interesting despite the time spent on them. I particularly like the latter one on the strength of the confession scene. The acting alone was powerful and it's one of my favorite scenes from Battle Creek. I am however shocked and annoyed that the principal wasn't more upset that her teachers were selling grades. Who else is getting grade hikes and for how much? That's some terrible leadership there on all levels. As for 1.11, the best part of it was the twist at the end. Nice job there, Battle Creek writers.
Grade: B- / B+
Best Reason to Watch - Font's back and the cases are interesting
Best Reason to Fast Forward - the awkwardness that is Holly and Russ
Best Scene - Larry Duncan talking about watching his son's brain deteriorate while playing football
Best Reaction - Guz to Holly's new look
Best Case for Body Snatchers - Russ is the empathetic one who allows a woman to cry on his shoulder, literally and bases his opinion on love
Best Twist - the victim paid the hit man to kill his wife and then took the bullet to save her
Best PSA - football and post-concussive syndrome
Biggest Ouch - Russ outs Holly's leaving
Biggest Shock - someone calls Russ "sensitive" and they are NOT being sarcastic / the football quarterback doesn't want to play football because he wants to be pre-med
Least Shocking - Kowalski is a hit man
Worst Principal - Did she even care that her teachers were making up grades? Really?
Smartest Cop - Niblet because he's right that someone hiring a hit man would have an alibi
Most Surprising - Milt's drawer of broken phones, which shows he has a temper
Biggest Side Eye - Russ broke into Milt's apartment to get his laptop? Hmm. You could have called.
The "Um, Huh?" Award - Why, oh why are they having sex in the evidence room? I still haven't figured out why Holly is into Russ period.
Best Blackmail - Milt tells the NSA guy to do him a favor or he'll leak the news that the guy was using spyware to see if his wife was cheating on him
Best New Insult - dink whistle
The "Welcome Back" Award - Alex Carter, who played one of my favorite characters on Burn Notice / Annette O'Toole, who raised Superman / Eddie McClintock formerly of Warehouse 13 / Michael Beach from Secrets and Lies / Michael McGrady from American Crime Story
Best Quotes -
1. Funk: "Russ actually looks happy." Font: "There's a miracle."
2. Russ: "Yeah about that, you know…boy, Milt you didn't have to cover for me. You know that?" Milt: "I'm just doing what anyone would have done, Russ." Russ: "No, you did what no one would have done. Everyone else, they would blame someone else…like me."
3. Jaycocks: "Do you want me to be the sitting duck?" Niblet: "No, you're a girl so you won't fool him and you're a girl so I should do it." Jaycocks: "The word is woman and…uh, thank you or screw you. I'm not quite sure."
4. Holly: "I mean everyone loved Zuransky." Guz: "Deductive reasoning tells me at least one person didn't."
5. Milt: "You truly believe Derek lost so much money that somebody paid Kowalski $50,000 to have him killed. Seems like a lot of money to pay somebody because you didn't get paid."
The Royals - 1.07-1.10 (season finale)
The Royals is a soapy mess of a show in best way possible. It's addictive in the same way Empire is and the characters are largely just as despicable. I don't know if I will watch season 2 or not, but I do fear for England under King Cyrus. No fictional character needs to die more than he does right now. Still I don't think he's behind Robert's death. That seems too subtle for him. The stabbing of his brother sounds more his speed. I'm guessing Joan Collins is behind the whole thing because…well, she's Joan Collins and she always plays the most manipulative and cunning character in the room. The question becomes why does Liam have the same domino symbol around his neck as the letter Helena receives. She's obviously in league with whomever it is. I get that it means the fall of the royal house but under whose direction and what is the plan afterwards? As long as it ends in killing Cyrus, I'm good. Just don't kill Liam. He's the only real hope for the monarchy and the show now that King Simon's gone.
Overall Grade: B, but Cyrus is a deal breaker for me as is killing off the only good character
Best Reason to Watch - lots of soapy twists and turns
Best Character - Queen Helena, who is running more things than is suspected
Biggest Twist - Cyrus outs Queen Helena and claims Liam and Eleanor are not legitimate heirs of the crown
Best Advice - Gemma is really, really good at public relations
Best Moment - Liam says he has to go back to avenge his father's death
Worst Moment - King Simon dies
Most Cathartic Moment - Liam punches out Cyrus
Best Speech - King Simon calls for a referendum to abolish the monarchy
Worst Time to be Tardy - when you are supposed to have a heart-to-heart with your father, The King
The "Say What?" Award - Prudence is now evil too and carrying King Cyrus' child. Say it isn't so!
Most Childish - Eleanor spray painting over national art
Most Needing to Die - Cyrus, as always
Most Surprising - Helena and Cyrus were working together to stop Liam's coronation
Worst Way to Drown Your Sorrows - drunken karaoke
Best Bromance - Marcus and Liam
Best Alliance - Queen Helena and the leader of the antimonarchists / surprisingly Jasper and Eleanor
Best Casting - Joan Collins as the Grand Duchess of Oxford
Best Revenge - Eleanor hits the panic button to have Jasper arrested after finding out he slept with Helena
Best Confrontation - Simon tells off Helena and Cyrus
The "Okay Then" Award - Robert's murderer just out and out tells Eleanor that he murdered her brother
Biggest Laugh - Liam singing, "I Just Can't Wait to be King" after hearing that Simon is not his father
Best Point - Gemma is right in saying that Ophelia didn't care about her feelings when she and Liam got together so Gemma doesn't care about Ophelia's feelings
Most Kind - Jasper takes Eleanor to see her father
Most Intimidating - Eleanor's new bodyguard
Stalker - 1.19/1.20 - Love Hurts / Love Kills (series finale)
Too much relationship, not enough Janice, fan unfriendly cliffhanger. That's pretty much the summary for the series finale of Stalker, which is a real shame because they had the bones of a great 2-part case. The idea of a serial killer who stalked the victims of previous stalkings had a lot of merit, even if I guessed the killer right away. Finding victims through sex addiction meetings was pretty brilliant too. I would have liked to see them develop this story more, but instead it felt rushed and incomplete because they spent so much time on Jack and Beth and more awkward conversations than any 42 minute show should ever have. To be honest, the powers that be really screwed over the fans. They should have ended with Beth's kidnapping and the killing of Ray and put this storyline more midway through. It was clear that Stalker wasn't going to get a second season fairly early on, what with all the bad press it got. They should have put fans first instead of this disappointing finale.
Grade: C+ / C-
Best Reason to Watch - the case
Best Reason to Fast Forward - Jack and Beth's relationship
Best Character Who Never Got Enough Screen Time - Janice
Most Overrated Character - Jack
Worst Odds - Beth had a stalker-killer ex. Vicky has a killer ex. Jack stalked his ex. If Janice or Ben have old flames in the psycho business, I'm going to start thinking it's the TAU.
Worst Plan - If you are being stalked, you have someone wait to walk you out to your car. You don't tell everyone to go home while you're in the building alone. It's self-preservation and common sense.
Best Detective - Janice, who uncovers a serial killer. My money's on Kristoffer Polaha or the missing Rachel.
The "Well That's Not at ALL Suspect" Award - the serial killer is wearing a stocking over his/her head outside in the daylight where anyone could see him/her
Scariest Thought - it's super easy for someone to get a picture of you putting in your alarm code The "Welcome Back" Award (character) - Ben, I've missed you. Glad you're okay.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Adam Kaufman, formerly of State of Affairs and Without a Trace / Kristoffer Polaha recently of Backstrom and Ringer / David Anders aka the bad guy in everything including iZombie / Sam Witwer from Being Human
Best Quotes -
1. Pam: "These gifts don't fool me. He's one love song away from snapping. He's not right in his head."
2. Clay: "Why does everybody think the worst about me?" Jack: "Because you're kind of creepy."
3. Janice: "Drinks?" Ben: "I have painkillers." Janice: "Fun."
4. Jack: "I need friends at the NSA."
5. Beth: "How's it going?" Jack: "You know a stalking here, a threat there."
iZombie - 1.09 / 1.10 - Patriot Brains / Mr. Berserk
My love of iZombie episodes largely depends on who Liv's eating in them. I wasn't impressed with either of these two brains. Objectively Patriot Brains was better but it gets major points deducted for killing off Lowell, a lovable character with a lot of potential. Mr. Berserk was just stupid, as in Liv was stupid. I don't need that in a main character so I will be happy to be done with Alcoholic Brain for good. It did push forward the story in a great way though. In fact both episodes did so that's why they aren't in the C range for grades. I hope that NOT telling Major comes back to haunt them all though. If there's one thing I've learned watching supernatural shows, it's that keeping secrets from loved ones never works in the end. (See Supernatural as a prime example.) I'd love to see Major become a zombie hunter since he's currently the most loyal, courageous, and downright good character on the show. Having to deal with the hunting world would shake up his. Other than that, Liv and Ravi's friendship continues to be a high point but I’d like to see Liv spend more time with Clive like she used to.
Grade: B- for both
Best Reason to Watch - Major is about 2 episodes away from believing in zombies and figuring out Liv's secret / the Max Rager story gets back on track
Most Intense Scene - Liv confesses her role in Lowell's death to Ravi and then breaks down over Lowell's body
Best Moment - Clive and Liv take out notebooks in tandem to take notes on the roommate's story
Biggest Douche Bag - It's not Blaine this time. Sketchy D-Bag is the correct name for the debate douche.
Biggest Psycho - Sebastian, who somehow makes the typical villain monologue even more creepy
Biggest Cause for Concern - Clive thinks Liv's brain salad smells good
Biggest Applause - finally someone says that Blaine must die…because well, he does
Biggest Turnaround - Liv goes from sobbing in grief to bloodthirsty revenge in about 1.5 seconds
Best Call - Ravi basically saying Liv is being a hypocrite for calling Lowell out on his brain consumption
Worst Call - Ravi did not tell Liv that he got bit by ZombieRat
Worst Plan - killing off Lowell just when he got interesting / not telling Major the truth
Least Use of Brain Power - Liv, who meets with the head of Max Rager to confront him instead of waiting like Clive asked her to, giving him a heads up on the investigation. Then she goes off with the assassin like a newbie.
Most Likely to be a Problem in the Future - crazy zombie assassin
Best Addition - Scott E, who finally mentions the "Z" word
Best Friend / Most Amazing - Major, who takes care of a drunk Liv even though she's being a lousy friend to him
Best PSA - Liv is proof positive that alcohol makes you a moron
Worst Trade Off - If we keep Blaine and lose Lowell, I'm going to be ticked. Blaine is wearing on my last nerve as the Big Bad with all his strutting and poser-ing. We need someone higher up the food chain right now.
The "Welcome Back" Award - Steven Weber, who specializes in smug douche bags these days
Best Quotes -
1. Julien: "Major? Blond pretty boy who looks like he fell out of a Nicholas Sparks movie?"
2. Ravi: "A journalist slash raging alcoholic. Her cerebral spinal fluid practically came out on the rocks with a lemon twist."
3. Liv: "We could just go door-to-door asking where the sketchy d-bag is." Clive: "Half of them are law students. We'd be here all day."
4. Ravi: "After the boat party, whenever you woke up in a body bag, how did you know you were a zombie?" Liv: "The craving brains didn't really speak to werewolves."
6. Clive: "Dr. C., you mind if I take your assistant on a field trip?" Ravi: "I'd sign her permission slip, but my hands are covered in viscera."
Younger - 1.08 / 1.09 - Sk8 / I'm with Stupid
Grade: B- / B
Best Reason to Watch - Kelsey and Liza / Maggie and Liza
Best Scene - Kelsey tells Liza we all have deal breakers
Dumbest Subplot - Liza thinking Josh is dumb
Most Interesting Tactic - I never thought of book club reviews being that powerful before. I guess if you're having trouble finding a publisher, the next stop is Goodreads.
Best Babysitter - Liza
Biggest Name Dropping - Philip Roth
Biggest Guts - Kelsey tells Anton's wife that they are having an affair in the middle of an award ceremony
The "Oh This Won't End Well" Award - hints of something developing between Charles and Liza mean big problems between Diana and Liza down the road
The "Say What?" Award - Just because people think Liza's a lesbian doesn't mean they have the right to accost her and kiss her. Back off, drunk lady.
Most Fun - zombie attack or skateboarding home
Least Fun - I'm with Liza here, dodgeball
Most Talented - Liza with her ability to navigate NYC while reading a book
Best Quotes -
1. Liza: "There was nowhere to run. It was like being trapped in a cage with rabid hipsters. If there's such things as artesian steroids, I'm pretty sure they were on them."
2. Jake: "So you're a videogame virgin." Liza: "Is that a big deal?" Roman: "Not if you're Amish."
3. Charles: "So now we're taking pleasure in other people's misery." Liza: "No, we're taking solace in other people's misery and we should do it frequently in order to maintain our sanity."
4. Liza: "Messes make people interesting." Charles: "They do?" Liza: "Yes, the messier the better. Name any great artist."
5. Liza: "Do you think Josh is dumb?" Kelsey: "I'm sure he's dumb. He's a guy." Liza: "Josh dropped out of college." Kelsey: "So did Mark Zuckerberg." Liza: "Kelsey, he doesn't read." Kelsey: "Well if that's important to you, then that's important. I mean we all have our deal breakers."
6. Diana: "You have no idea what it's like to be single and in your 40's. It's like trying to rent out a beautiful apartment where a murder took place. Everyone's spooked."
The Flash - 1.22 - Rogue Air
So was this supposed to be the backdoor pilot of the new spin-off show? Are all these people going to be on it or only Cold? Was this episode to fan service something going on in Arrow? The penultimate episode seems like a weird time for a bad guy reunion unless they are going to be featured in the finale as well. I was also surprised that they captured Wells already. Unless he escapes in the next episode, this is going to be one very different finale than what I was expecting. Still this episode had a ton of action and that automatically raises my appreciation. Plus there was good teamwork. While it didn't work as a penultimate episode for me (which might change when I see the finale), it was a lot of fun.
Grade: B for action
Best Reason to Watch - lots of action
Best Teamwork - Barry, Oliver, and Ronnie
Best Continuity - I didn't even remember some of these villains so it was nice that the writers did
Most Important Crime Fighting Accessory - soda, which only on The Flash is a bad guy sensor
Best Save - Iris, who apparently they are trying to make less useless
Worst Plan - Barry goes to Snart to help him transport the prisoners
Smartest Plan - Snart wants everything about himself erased from all files so he can start again
Biggest Face Palm - Why the heck would Barry ever want to be like Oliver the Douche? The reason I'm watching your show is because you are NOT Oliver, Barry! (And this show isn't written like some daytime TV Maury Povitch special…yet.)
Most Vaguely Ominous - Oliver tells Barry that he might need a favor
Best Question - I like that Joe questions how they are different from those they are pursuing because it means that the show has a conscience. Most superhero shows drive me to distraction because it is increasingly hard to tell the "heroes" from the villains and I never want that to happen here.
Best Quotes -
1. Cisco: "Really not enjoying being one of the good guys this week. Really not."
2. Lisa: "How come you haven't given me a code name. I heard you came up with Captain Cold. What do you think I should be called?" Cisco: "Female inmate."
3. Barry: "You know I just learned the hard way not to trust the bad guy."
4. Joe: "You know the difference between right and wrong and you weren't willing to blur the lines between the two. That's the kind of man you are and that's what makes you different than the Arrow. So please, no more walks on the dark side. Agreed?"
5. Joe: "Damn. You can't get that at Radio Shack."
CSI: Cyber - 1.11/1.12/1.13 - Ghost in the Machine / Bit by Bit / Family Secrets (season finale)
I really don't understand why this show gets so much hate. Yes, it is ridiculously predictable in some ways. In every episode Krumitz and Nelson will have a cute bromance moment, Avery will tell us something we all already know in a PSA manner, and some nerd will run, causing Mundo to chase after him or her. It's a crime procedural. They all have certain things you know will happen. Therefore the only reason I can guess for why this one is particularly loathed is either because it got renewed in place of its parent show or that it is really nothing like it. That doesn't make it bad. In fact, I prefer it to CSI. I like the relationships on Cyber, especially Krumitz and Nelson's bromance, and I find the tech side fascinating if a little scary. I didn't realize there were so many ways for hackers to ruin your life. Identity theft is just the beginning, folks. Add to it a lot more action than I ever figured would be in a computer geek show and CSI: Cyber pleasantly surprised me. What didn't was throwing in the random murder of the guy who killed Krumitz's parents. It felt like the writers were surprised by the renewal and had to find some kind of cliffhanger. Really the show did not need one. This episode was a nice wrap-up to Avery's introduction to cybercrime and had some good emotional scenes throughout. They should have left well enough alone.
Grade: B (until 10 minutes left in the season finale)
Ghost in the Machine Awards:
Weekly Tech to be Afraid Of - game consoles and kids who are smarter about tech than their parents / your computer network / blue tooth hacking guns
Smartest Hacker - Raven realizes the game console is how the kid heard from the gun dealer
The "Yikes, We're Screwed" Award - if kids are so concerned about their stuff in the videogame world that they'd do favors for strangers in real life, we're in big trouble when they're old enough to vote
Biggest Dummy - the video game kid who thought he could leap from one rooftop to another because he did it in a videogame
Most Fun - the team plays a video game together to celebrate their win
Least Surprising - the gun that Viper tries to shot Avery with is unloaded
Most Surprising - Devon decides to have Mundo move back in
Biggest Misnomer - super cookie sounds like a delightful dessert not a tracking device
The "Say What?" Award - If several vehicles come in to the park with sirens flashing and people with FBI vests come pouring out, would you just keep going about your business? Why is no one staring at this spectacle and asking what's going on? Better yet, why aren't they gathering their families and getting out of there?
Most Awkward - Nelson and Simon trying to fistbump/shake hands/hug
Biggest Shenanicanon? - Either it's another day or Trigger stays an awful long time on a library computer, given that Krumitz and Nelson have to fly to Tampa to be there. I can't believe that Trigger would be there any longer than he has to be, given the public setting where anyone can see what site he's on. I'm also not sure why they would chance him being spooked and not returning to the library when they could have the FBI near Tampa get him on that day.
The "I Totally Agree" Award - Mundo is right. Anyone who thinks what they do in the game world they can do in real life is crazy.
Biggest Facepalm - Mundo asks if Avery thinks the perp made them. They are wearing big vests that say FBI on them so it's not like they were trying to go undercover.
Bit by Bit Awards:
Best Scene - Krumitz takes out the bad guy
Best Character Interaction - Krumitz and Nelson
Best Awww Moment - Nelson gets his devices back and sees a digital picture of his parents / Avery convinces Nelson to call his parents
Most Fun - Nelson and Avery sing his mom's favorite song together
Worst Luck - nothing like having the family photos rat your alibi out
Biggest Surprise - Krumitz can run and kick butt when he wants to
The "Say What?" Award - No one told the kid not to go back home? Are they nuts? I would have gotten my kid and made sure he was with me through this. Plus, no one saw the kid heading to his house and stopped him? Are they not surrounding the house?
Best Music - How Sweet It Is (To Be Loved by You) by Marvin Gaye
Family Secrets Awards:
Best Reason to Watch - Avery's original hacking problem is resolved
Best Awww Moment - Krumitz gives Avery a burner phone with all her contacts already uploaded
Best Twist - Avery's patient killed her other patient instead of the ex-husband
Most Intense - Logan damages the laptop in anger against Avery
Best Backstory - Simon's best friend died in front of him in a car accident / Avery's ex-husband
Biggest Hmm - This episode pretty much ended at 37:30, so why did they tack on the murder of the man who killed Krumitz's parents?
Biggest Foul - no one called Avery out for ditching her team and scaring them all like that
The "I Don't Think So" Award - a few sweet nothings doesn't excuse worrying Raven and possibly getting her in trouble at work, Nelson
Least Surprising - Krumitz's sister killed the man who killed their parents
Best Casting - David Dastmalchian, who played Logan, embodied creepy in this episode
Best Plan - Simon doesn't share personal information on any of his agents
Worst Plan - not bringing your team in on your plan
Best Advice - Simon tells Krumitz that he can't hang on to his anger over his parents' deaths
The "Oh Come On" Award - If he's trying to poison you with carbon monoxide, the first step after dialing Mundo should be to throw that beautiful name plate through the windows and let the monoxide dissipate. You are smarter than this, Avery.
The "Welcome Back" Award (character) - Krumitz's sister
Best Quotes -
1. Krumitz: "So this is your place, huh? Nice, homey." Avery: "Well what did you expect?" Krumitz: "Oh I don't know. Uh, drum set, velvet Elvis, pet alligator." Avery: "Well he's at the vet."
2. Nelson: "Wait a minute. There's a Cyber Most Wanted List. Well what number was I?" Raven: "Um, you didn't make the list." Krumitz: "Hey in my heart, you were always #1."
3. Avery: "Well if you brought me here for a session maybe we should start with your delusional fantasies and your obsessive behavior."
4. Simon: "You're never going to get rid of the loss but you have got to get past this anger because that 10 year old kid who lost his parents is now a 28 year old man."
5. Nelson: "You think he really went to go shoot this guy? I mean if I was 15 years old and somebody told me to go kill someone, I couldn't do it. I'm a grown-a** man and I couldn't even do it now." Krumitz: "Really? You're fully grown?" Nelson: "The best things come in small packages, Krummy."
The Goldbergs - 2.24 - Goldbergs Feel Hard (season finale)
I loved The Goldbergs last year when it seemed like few people knew about it and I felt like I was constantly trying to promote it to new viewers. What a difference one year and a whole lot better time slot makes. The Goldbergs is a hit and up almost 30% in the ratings. Woo hoo! It's the one comedy success story I have from last year. If anything, The Goldbergs has only gotten better this season. Sure there were a few episodes that weren't my favorite, usually ones involving Beverly going way over the top at school. Still, overall the balance between comedy and heart has been outstanding and this episode is no different. I adore Murray overhearing Erica saying how much he means to her. It was a sweet father-daughter moment and he wasn't even in the room. I'm not sure what season 3 will bring, but I can't wait to have more of the Goldbergs on my TV.
Grade: A-
Best Reason to Watch - family and all its ups and downs
Best Aww Moment - Erica tells Beverly that she loves Murray while he's listening from the hallway / Barry puts his arm around Adam and asks if he's okay
Saddest Moment - Adam learns Dana is moving to Seattle
Best Reaction - Erica to Murray telling her that he loves her
Weirdest Fight Ever - Murray and Erica in an "I love you" battle
Most in Need of Remedial Geography - Barry, who thinks Seattle is in Canada
Biggest Facepalm - Adam plans to pull the fire alarm instead of getting Dana's combination from a friend
Best Save - Coach's over the top locker drug search to get the letter back for Adam
Best Montage - extended end segment placing the real video next to the show video
Best Music - If You Leave by OMD
Best Quotes -
1. Murray: "Okay, you're rage cleaning. Before you wipe a hole in the counter, tell me what I did." Beverly: "Why can't you just tell the kids you love them?" Murray: "You tell them a hundred times a day. How much love do these people need?"
2. Erica: "He's my dad. I love him more than anything. Trust me. He knows."
3. Erica: "Mom, stop rage juicing. If you want to talk, I'm right here." Beverly: "How could you?" Erica: "I've done some questionable things lately, so if you could just say out loud what I did first…just so we're all on the same page." Beverly: "Your father said, 'I love you,' and you didn't say it back." Erica: "Yes, that is definitely the worst thing I've done this week."
4. Laney: "When my mom left, it crushed my dad so I swore I'd never be so dumb to fall in love myself but you're just so dumb you made me fall in love with you anyway."
5. Murray: "I tell the kids I love them every day by putting a roof over their heads." Beverly: "Yeah, well what's gonna happen when Erica leaves for the summer? Where's your fancy love roof then?"
Supernatural - 10.22 - The Prisoner
Generally I'm not a fan of Supernatural's penultimate episodes. They are usually where the emotional fall out consumes all the time so they're low on action. Not in this case. I loved seeing Dean going turbo mode on the Stynes and I have no problem with the throw down with Cas either. I do have a problem with him being a huge hypocrite though. After all the fallout of Dean trying to save Sam multiple times, he has no right to speak harshly to Sam even about Charlie's death. Speaking of, I'm glad she got a hunter's funeral. It's a good way to send off a character that was mostly good for the story, once they stopped having her save everyone that is. I am a bit disappointed that the Styne storyline was over so quickly. They could have made good season-long Big Bads.
Grade: B
Best Reason to Watch - Dean goes off the deep end
Best Scene - Sam vs. Crowley
Best Action - Dean kills Monroe and the others / Dean and Cas fight
Best Consistency / Best Speech - Sam brings up how Dean never let him die
Most Anticlimactic - Dean shoots Eldon in the head, which was smart but less cathartic
Most in Need of Fleeing - Rowena, because a ticked Crowley on your tail is never pleasant
Biggest Cheat - not letting us see Dean take down the others
Biggest What the Heck - Never thought I'd hear folk music on Supernatural. This is like when they played Fall Out Boy in Bloody Mary.
Biggest Overreaction - kidnapping the kid who knocked your cousin down and dicing him up for spare parts
The "It's about Time" Award - Crowley is finally acting like the King of Hell. This softer side of Crowley wasn't working for me, although the snark always does.
Quickest Escape - Dean doesn't lie so if he says he's getting out in 30 seconds you better just hand over the keys and put your hands up
Most Sane - Cyrus Styne, who wants out of his family stat
Biggest Hypocrite/Jerk - Dean, who would have done the same thing in Sam's place. Don't you dare throw this in Sam's face after whining about him not looking for you in Purgatory.
Biggest Gasp - Dean kills the kid. I knew he was going to and it still affected me anyway.
Best Quotes-
1. Sam: "Cas look, I've been the one out there messed up and scared and alone and Dean…" Cas: "Did whatever he could to save you." Sam: "Yes. I mean it's become his thing. I owe him this. I owe him everything. Look I know he pretends that he can ride the mark out but you and I know the truth. We know what happens if we don't cure him. We both know where that road ends." Cas: "Black eyes and blood." Sam: "Yes. Go. Find him, Cas. Keep him safe."
2. Crowley: "You're right. I am the monster and I've done bad. I've done things you can't even imagine. Horrible, evil, messy things…and I've loved every damn minute. So thank you Sam for reminding me who I really am."
3. Sheriff: "Oh you can't take on the Stynes. They own this town. They're practically gods around here." Dean: "Yeah, well I kill gods."
4. Sam: "When it's done with you, you won't be you anymore. Dean, you're all I've got so of course I was going to fight for you because that's what we do."
5. Dean: "That's for lying to me….and that is for my Baby. Now, who're you talking to?"
Supernatural - 10.23 - Brother's Keeper (season finale)
I have no idea what just happened here. I've stopped trying to make sense of Supernatural but this is way beyond that. All I know is that if Baby dies, the darkness is going down. As for this being the finale, well it was all about the brothers and that's exactly what Supernatural should be. I am not wildly crazy about Swan Song like most of the fandom but this reversal of it was well done. It was Sam's chance to give everything for his brother, albeit with pictures instead of the Impala. I love how Sam would not stop telling Dean that he was a good person, even when Dean was hitting him. Of all the things this season got right, it finally fixed the brothers after the disaster that was season 8. I liked Sam far better this season and it was a nice switch to make the season arc about Sam having to save Dean for a change. This wasn't classic Supernatural by any stretch. It will never be the quality of SPN season 1-3 again, but this was the best Supernatural has been since Jeremy Carver took over and that's enough for me these days. I'm still rooting for the return of the real king though. Eric Kripke, come back and save your show from the pretender!
Grade: B-
Best Reason to Watch - Sam fights for Dean with everything he has in a reversal of Swan Song
Biggest Fake Out - I was about to be even more irate with Jeremy Carver than usual when the acapella version of Carry On Wayward Son started. Not that I think it's bad because I don't. You just don't mess with tradition. When we got the real thing, I was appeased.
Biggest Adios - no getting the deposit back on that motel room
Biggest What the Heck - Mark or no mark, since when is Dean okay with sacrificing Sam? Oh yeah, in the same Carver-afflicted universe where Sam doesn't search for Dean. Bah and a pox on your whole house!
The "Well It Made Sense at the Time" Award - with a problem like the mark, it does seem better to bring out the big guns and take the consequences
Least Shocking - Supernatural is blaming God for Lucifer as well. Huge sigh.
Most Surprising - Well I guess Death is not going to reap God after all. Dean Winchester killing Death. That's not going to come back to bite them at all I'm sure.
The "Say What?" Award - Why is Crowley's way not negotiation? It seems like giving him Rowena would be a better platform for discussion.
The "Liar, Liar" Award - Dean can say it until he's blue in the face but he's nowhere near good
Most Nostalgic - the picture of Mary, John, and the boys survived
Worst Negotiation - Rowena says she gets her freedom AND the codex after doing the spell
Most Handy - Dean can suddenly cook authentic Mexican. Cool.
The "Um, I Don't Think So" Award - Dean did not just give away Baby. Nope. Unnh unh.
The "Nice to Meet You" Award - Rudy, may you not be like Garth. That is if you even make it through the next 37 minutes. (Nope, you didn't even last 10 minutes. Oh well.)
The "Welcome Back" Award (character) - SPN is the only show where I miss Death
The "Welcome Back" Award (clothing) - Dean's black t-shirt not hampered by flannel
Best Continuity - so now everyone's summoned a crossroads demon / Death's love of junk food
Best Memory - Death remembers how the Winchesters have screwed him over in the past
Best Meta - Oscar is going by Seth at this time, which is coincidentally Adam and Eve's third child after Cain kills Abel
Bets Quotes -
1. Sam's whole 8 minute speech about how the Winchesters are good
2. Crowley: "Who summons anymore? Couldn't you call?" Cas: "You're not in my contacts list."
3. Dean: "No games, no second thoughts. I know you know what this is. I know you know what it can do. Now I've tried to fight it. I've tried to beat it on my own and I…I can't. I've got no moves left except you." Death: "Well I never thought I'd see the day. My goodness, Dean Winchester has tipped over his king. But I won't kill you, Dean."
4. Death: "Our conundrum is simple, Sam. Your brother cannot be killed and the mark cannot be destroyed, not without inciting a far greater evil than any of us have ever known." Sam: "What evil?" Dean: "The darkness." Sam: "What the hell is that?" Dean: "What does it sound like? Does it sound like a good thing?"
5. Seth: "How do you know all this?" Crowley: "A hamster told me."
6. Crowley: "Forbidden fruit. Well for starters it’s a quince, you dummy, not an apple. Not a problem. Golden Calf or what's left of it. Check. Something Rowena loves?" Cas: "I would have thought it would have been you but…" Crowley: "Spare me. I lived it."
Young & Hungry - 2.08 / 2.09 - Young & Sandwich / Young & Pretty Woman
Ugh! Just ugh! I care not one jot about Gabi and Josh hooking up. I just want to laugh and nothing about 2.09 did that. It might be time for me to drop this show. Will they-won't they does nothing for me. Hooking up with your boss does nothing for me. Right now I want to fast forward every time Josh or Gabi is on screen and only watch the parts with Yolanda, Sofia, and Elliot. Sadly they are usually on screen with either Gabi or Josh. Once again, I wish there was a spin-off. We're about halfway done with this season but the next 3 episodes will tell me all I need to know.
Grade: B- / D
Best Reason to Watch - Yolanda, Sofia, and even Elliot
Bets Reason to Fast Forward - Cooper-Gabi-Josh love triangle
Best Trick - Yolanda gets Josh to sweep the floors while he's distracted
Most Nosy - Gabi just cannot butt out of other people's business
Biggest Hypocrite - Sofia who is also keeping things from Gabi so she can't exactly be upset that Gabi kept something from her
Least Likely to End Up on Dateline - Sofia does background searches on the guys she dates
Best Revenge - Cooper tells Gabi all about Josh making Sofia lie to her
Best New Addition - Alan
Worst Judgment - Josh sleeps with Caroline again
Worst Timing - Josh tells Gabi that he loves her after Cooper comes back and moves in with her
Most Nostalgic - Zima
Best Quotes -
1. Marco: "I haven't seen you since the Madonna concert." Eliot: "That was a terrible place to dump me. I haven't been able to listen to her music since." Marco: "Honey, no one has."
2. Gabi: "Hey Cupid, meet Sofia Maria Consuela Rafaela Rodriguez. This is gonna be an AutoCorrect nightmare."
3. Eliot: "Well Alan showed me his big surprise. He liquidated his retirement account and bought a karaoke bar. I'm gay and Asian and I still think that's a stupid idea."
4. Gabi: "You know what's breaking bad? Your dating life."
5. Gabi: "Yes, I know what an orgasm is. I just didn't know that you could register for one."
Elementary - 3.24 - A Controlled Descent (season finale)
Elementary has been by and large disappointing to me this season. It hasn't fallen off the rails completely like Sleepy Hollow or become some hollow image of its former sense like Grimm, but things have been off all season. The real appeal to this show besides twisty cases is the relationship between Sherlock and Watson. When that gets damaged the show suffers and sadly their relationship has been off all season. The best part of season 3 was the introduction of Kitty and they sent her packing far too soon. Now it feels like they are throwing everything at the ideas board to stave off cancellation. The writing smells like desperation and I'm afraid hooking Sherlock back on drugs is the final last ditch effort. One I am not a fan of by the way. I have no need to watch a semi-comatose Sherlock struggle his way out of heroin. I'd rather have the old camaraderie back and continue with some great, twisty cases. Elementary has lost its way as surely as Sherlock has and it's time to brush off those season 2 DVDs and get the magic going again. Oh and as always, find a way to bring Moriarty back. She's the best part of Sherlock.
Grade: C+
Best Reason to Watch - hopefully this gets rid of Oscar for good since he has to be locked up for kidnapping
Best Moment - they find Alfredo alive
Most Cathartic - Sherlock beats the heck out of Oscar
Worst Twist - Sherlock starts using again
Best Part of the Cliffhanger - maybe we'll see Sherlock's dad
Biggest Douche - the guy who thinks his Charger is stolen
Biggest Lowlife / Most Desperate - Oscar, who isn't happy until he's bringing everyone else down with him
Most Amusing - Sherlock trying to bond with Alfredo over Abbott and Costello flicks
Best Continuity - Sherlock brings up Alastair's death
Least Welcome Return - Oscar, who is always annoying
Best Quotes -
1. Oscar: "What? It doesn't bother you - the shooting gallery last night. Seeing everything that you saw. Wow. You're like…you're like cured now?" Sherlock: "That's one of the dumbest things I've ever heard you say and I've known you a long time."
2. Sherlock: "You seem quite certain that if he is in trouble, it's of his own making." Alfredo's Mom: "I'm not but if life with my son has taught me one thing, it's that you need to be ready for anything. If he did fall, I don't want him dragging you down with him. He wouldn't want it either."
3. Watson: "If Oscar thinks that taking you to a shooting gallery is going to help you find his sister, he's not just deranged. He's an idiot."
4. Sherlock: "There are methods of torture that even your pathetic frame could endure."
5. Sherlock: "I'm not really a fan of sharing, Oscar. I have no intention of opening up now."
Grimm - 4.22 - Cry Havoc (season finale)
This has been a topsy turvy season for Grimm. While Trubel was around, it was decent. There was more action and fast plot movement. Then Trubel left and besides Sleepy Hollow, I've never seen a show disintegrate into a hot mess faster. It has become clear that the writing staff on Grimm has no more ideas on what to do with the characters. How else can you explain the sudden vilification of Juliette and the current sanctifying of Adalind? Adalind apparently doesn't need to redeem herself from ALL the junk she's pulled. She just needs to get pregnant and get rid of her hexenbiest powers. Then all of a sudden everything's forgiven and she becomes instant Juliette 2.0. What the heck, writers! Since when have all the characters undergone a lobotomy? Ugh! This is just poor writing, period. There's refreshing the story and giving it new life. Then there's hoping the audience has amnesia and just goes with all the out-of-character junk you throw at them. Season 5 is likely my last with Grimm (and possibly NBC's if the ratings don't stop dropping) since the only good thing that's happened in this last half is that you finally brought Trubel back on and maybe gave her a plotline.
Grade: B+
Best Reason to Watch - they offed Juliette (but sadly not Adalind)
Best Reason to Have Season 5 - Trubel, who's the most interesting character they have
Best Action - Nick vs. Kenneth / fight at the Royals' rental
Best Plan - Nick, for once, has a smart plan where everything goes right. Hiding the severed head in Prince Kenneth's room was inspired.
Best Scene - Trubel shoots Juliette
Most Intense - Nick throttles Juliette
Most Gruesome - Nick plunges a spike in Kenneth
Biggest Heartache - Nick over his mom
Worst Subplot - Adalind's freaky purple eyed kid
The "Guess That Didn't Work" Award - They kill off all Nick's neighbors so they can surround the house and yet Hank, Trubel, and Nick just walk out the back door. So much for overkill.
Biggest Say What? - I don't get it. Is Trubel working with the FBI: Wesen Squad? What did Chavez means when she said, "Get her."?
The "No Truer Statement Has Ever Been Said" Award - Trubel: "I never should have left."
The "Too Cool for Weapons" Award - Monroe doesn't need to bring anything to a fight. He is the fight.
The "Yet Another Reason Why Adalind Must Die" Award - Rosalee is stuck babysitting again
The "Oh Please" Award - King Frederick tries to tell Juliette that the royal family has always been on the side of hexenbiests when Renard's life clearly shows otherwise
The "I'm with You" Award - Trubel to hearing Adalind is pregnant with Nick's baby and Juliette's a hexenbiest. That's the same face I was giving the writers right before I facepalmed.
Best Reaction - Nick figures out that Juliette set up Mama Grimm
Worst Reaction - Adalind, who overreacts badly whenever questioned about the head
Best Plot Twist - Meisner kills the king and takes Diana
Best Save - Monroe attacks the Wesen who attacks Hank
Best Indiana Jones Moment - Wu starts with the 3-prong dagger but ends up going shotgun
Biggest Huh - Why did Trubel drop her weapon? It's the beginning of the fight and even still you'd want to take the evidence with you, not leave it at the crime scene. Urgh! Portland is wearing off on Trubel and that's never good.
Biggest Facepalm - Adalind, when dropping off a head in your hotel room to frame a prince, use gloves so your fingerprints aren't all over the plastic wrap. It'll be hard to pin the murder on Kenneth if you're so careless.
Best Cheers - Rosalee and Monroe try to relax after a long day of getting rid of Jack the Ripper and cutting up bodies for potions
Least Sympathetic - King Frederick, who is just as likely to feed you to the lions as reward you
Most Done with This - Wu, who kicks Kenneth in the knee to get him down and then pushes him over when he protests
Most Useful - Kenneth, who started forward plot movement when he came and tied up a moronic loose subplot with his death
Biggest Vigilantes - Team Grimm, who completely bypass any semblance of law or police work to take down the Royals
The "Welcome Back" Award (character) - Meisner, who's the only thing interesting about the Royals plot
Best Quotes -
1. Trubel: "Goodbye, Juliette."
2. Hank: "He's kind of dead, Nick. I don't think he's going to be answering any questions."
3. Wu: "Okay this is crazy. I'm going back." Hank: "No, no, no, no. This is the way Nick wanted." Wu: "Okay I'm sure Nick can handle this guy but he killed Nick's mom. What if he kills Nick?" Hank: "Then we finish what he started."
4. Hank: "We're gonna need you on this." Trubel: "You've got it. I never should have left."
5. Meisner: "Down with the king."
The Messengers - 1.05 / 1.06 - Eye in the Sky / Metamorphosis
The Messengers is progressing nicely, adding in little twists I didn't see coming. For instance, I had no idea another "angel" would be joining them. Currently I don't know what to make of Koa but I'm with Raul. I don't trust her and I don't think the others should either. You cannot make someone get on board with teamwork and common goals. Still she could go either way as a character. If she continues to make things harder, I'll want her gone. If she just adds a bit of tension and a new skill set to the team, then welcome aboard.
Grade: B / B-
Best Reason to Watch - the plot is getting more engrossing all the time
Best Character Interaction - Nadia and Peter
Best Twist - Pestilence is a computer virus
Least Surprising - Peter keeps the car from leaving / Richards is in charge of the meteorite now
Most Surprising - Nadia shoots Ronnie
Most Fun - story time with Raul
The "Say What?" Award - Why does the screen show Koa's wings but not Rose or Raul's? Do they only show up sporadically?
Worst Plan - Shouldn't they let someone who knows how to use a computer go meet the hacker? It seems strange to give that job to Rose when Nadia is the one who knows her way into the hacker scene.
Most Disgusting - Raul's burned hand
Biggest Oops - Peter pulls off the bathroom door when he's embarrassed by walking in on Nadia
Biggest Psycho - Erin's husband, Ronnie, who is paranoid about their safety
Biggest Huh? - How many winged people are there on this show? Who is this lady?
Biggest Mistake - don't tick off a fallen angel because they get answers by any means necessary / not telling Alan the truth
Biggest Face Palm - Does no one on Team Thwart the Apocalypse know how to Google it? How hard can it be to get an old lady's address?
Most Helpful - Nadia with her gun and computer skills
Best Reference - The Hunger Games
Best Quotes -
1. Raul: "It's a vision." Rosa: "No, it's a blackout." Raul: "Well I'll drink to that."
2. Nadia (to Raul giving her a gun): "You're kidding me, right? You want to give me a pack of smokes and some tequila while you're at it?"
3. Peter: "It's kind of hard to have faith in anything when you don't know where you come from." Nadia: "Maybe for now it's enough to know where you belong."
4. Peter: "I swear she was just here. She said we need to follow the signs." Erin: "What's that supposed to mean?" Peter: "I don't know. I barely passed algebra."
5. Raul: "Tell me you didn't just heal that kid." Erin: "What can I say? I'm a mother."
6. Alan (after braining someone with a rock): "What? It's in The Hunger Games."
Community - 6.09 - Grifting 101
Grade: C+
Best Reason to Watch - the group goofy dancing together
Best Scene - Britta punches out the grifting teacher
Most Vulnerable - Jeff, who says they're always picking on him
Best Use of Music - retooling the Community theme in the style of The Sting's theme song
Best Meta - talking about how The Sting is an awful movie
Best Continuity - bringing up how study group started
Best New Addition - Ryan Ridley
Best Reference - The Sting
Best Quotes -
1. Abed: "I'm starting to think that real grifts only happen in the movies and even in the movies they barely make sense."
2. Elroy: "That's something even I can mock and I live in an RV. I'm judging you and my dinner table folds down from a wall."
3. Frankie: "Okay. How many times have I told you people the faculty lounge is not a bar. Alright, pack it up people. Come on. You don't have to go teach a class but you can't stay here."
4. Annie: "You can't expel Britta. She's been here 6 years. 3 more and she'll have her 2 year degree." Abed: "Britta keeps me grounded in reality. You can't expel her with 4 weekisodes left in seasonmester."
5. Abed: "Jeff, you haven't even looked at the new course catalog. I'm like a kid in a candy store." Jeff: "The candy has lost its appeal now that I work at the store. You might say becoming a teacher here gave me diabetes."
6. Abed: "I've always wanted to learn more about grifting ever since I saw 1990's The Grifters starring John Cusack, Anjelica Huston, and almost no grifting."
Screencaps by
TV Fanatic,
TV Fanatic, and
Battle Creek Enquirer.
About the Author - Dahne
One part teacher librarian - one part avid TV fan, Dahne is a contributing writer for
SpoilerTV, where she recaps, reviews, and creates polls for The 100, Grimm, Teen Wolf, and others. She's addicted to
Twitter, live tweets a multitude of shows each week, and co-hosts the
Sleepy Hollow "Headless" and
Teen Wolf "Welcome to Beacon Hills" podcasts for Southgate Media Group. Currently she writes a
Last Week in TV column for
her blog and SpoilerTV.
~ "I speak TV."
